OREO GATE: Keep Your Cookies Away From My Kid! | The Treehouse Show

0:00 Do you have a storage unit that you've been holding onto for months, if not years? Do you tell yourself that this will be the month you finally go close it down after that rent payment clears? But it's still there, month after month. This is Trey from the Treehouse Show, and if this is you, you need OPT Services. Call OPT Services, and they'll give you a free estimate on clearing out your storage unit, but then they'll show you what separates them from other companies. They'll go through your items, separate the ones that have value, sell them, and split the profits with you. so you can finally close the door on that storage unit and make some money in the process. Give them a call or text today at 214-952-9831 or go to their website at nojunkinyourtrunk.com. That's nojunkinyourtrunk.com.

0:52 It is time to leave your worries outside. And laugh with us inside the Treehouse. I'm Dan O'Malley, along with Trey Trenholm and Jerry Caldwell. Coming up on the show today, we have got for you Crooked Jess. Really, dude? You're playing to the livestream crowd already? Trey, for those that are listening on the quote-unquote regular audio version of the Treehouse Show podcast at the end of the week, Trey has resorted to Pulling up his puppy. Lily, his new Chihuahua puppy, is now at the microphone in front of Trey.

1:33 Osama bin Lily. Osama bin Lily. Little terrorist puppy. I don't think a face like that could be a terrorist. That's what she wants you to think. Don't sell her shorts, sir. She's capable of many great things. Oh, my goodness. So what she is is a honeypot. She uses her looks to get in and get everything that she needs. So in addition to puppy cuteness here inside the treehouse today, we've got Crooked Jess. Trey is ugly. And the Dallas Cowboys criminal empire rolls on all today.

2:19 Trey's not ugly. Trey's old. For a lot of people, Trey, those two are interchangeable. We can discuss. Yeah, so that's all coming up today inside the treehouse. But first, we are going to start out with one of the most ridiculous internet arguments that I've seen in a long time. OreoGate. Are you guys familiar with OreoGate? I first saw this like a week ago, and it just keeps coming back around. OreoGate is the Internet's newest parenting war. Can one mom ban Oreos from every kid's lunch, or does her daughter just need to learn the brutal lesson of adulthood? A school mom group chat showed a parent asking everyone to stop packing Oreos because her daughter feels excluded. Another mom answered, essentially, that's life.

3:25 Because she's, that mom doesn't allow her daughter to have Oreos. There's no, this is a really important, there's no food allergy. There's no risk of harm to this girl. It's just that mom. Right. It is, Oreos are banned in this house. And when my daughter goes to school, she's surrounded by Oreos, and now she feels excluded. So because of this, the Oreo Nazi mom is now spreading her beliefs into the mom group chat saying, you guys need to stop having Oreos in your kids' lunches because they're tempting my child.

4:10 The other moms basically said, tough. They started their own group chat. Well, yeah. The 17-post Instagram saga has millions of views, but the conversations are unverified. And, you know, you never know. It may not be 100% real, but that's true of anything on the Internet. But for our purposes in here today, we're going to assume it's real. Because, honestly, whether or not the source material is real, people's reactions to it are. So there are people out there that actually do believe that other parents should fall in line with the parenting of one, saying everyone should comply, no one should have Oreos.

4:57 If one kid can't have Oreos, then none should have Oreos. Where are they from? Nazi Stan? Karenville. Karenville, yeah. Now, look. This is something I find fascinating on a couple of levels. One is as a fat kid growing up, I wish my parents would have implemented a little more stringent dietary guidelines, not just for me, but for our household that didn't happen. So a little Danny run amok. I never, so that's, I never, we, we never had a lot of junk food around my house. Like I, I never liked peanut butter as a kid. Um, I didn't really like sweets until I quit drinking. Never had Oreos, never had cookies, nothing like that. I mean, it was always a treat to go over to friends' houses because they had that stuff.

5:53 It's interesting you bring that up because I don't remember necessarily my household being filled with Oreo-type things, but I would just overeat as a kid. I do remember very much because we're talking about the 80s. The house was full of good old sugary cereals, which that might as well be a box of Oreos, honestly. And I ate cereal like I would never eat it again. Every single morning I ate a bowl of cereal big enough that you would probably think I would think that I was never going to have cereal again. If I needed to put on if all of a sudden, for some reason, I needed to put on weight. I would just go buy a big box of cinnamon toast crunch and a gallon of milk.

6:39 Talk slower. Talk slower, baby. And just bowl after bowl. All the bowls. Just right. But this is also, Dan, I don't remember if we had this discussion on or off the air about us not having kids anymore. I think it was off the air, but yeah. So yeah. But this is a reason why it's probably good. I had never had kids because if I was a parent in this group, I would stuff my kids bag with a, with a thing of double stuff Oreos every effing day.

7:23 I would take it a step further. I would give them a couple extra and be like, give this one to the kid that's missing out. Oh, absolutely. Just to have everybody get together, send all of their kids with one extra Oreo and. I would go along the premise of, you know, they say, well, do you have enough to share with the class? Yes, I do. Here you go. You two are adorable in your pettiness. Oh, you would take the high road? No, I'd take the much, much worse road. I would go so low. You'd be like, dude, that seems a little much. So in this scenario, because I don't like being told what to do, and if I don't like being told what to do, I really am not going to like you telling me, like a lot of parents, how to parent my child and what I should do because you're doing something that I think is absolutely freaking crazy.

8:11 So what I would do is I would have an outright Oreo cookie party. I would have Tiff's Treats lined up, stacked deep in the parent drop-off line, ready to come in with trays of cookies and treats and not just Oreo cookies but Oreo cookie cookies and cookies and cream ice cream all delivered right there for everyone at lunch everyone these kids are going to be surrounded by Oreos I might even hire a dancing Oreo to come in okay So I think I might be going too far with it. While at the same time, I would not want my.

9:02 I could see myself being the parent that is not allowing my kid to have Oreos. I would treat them very much like a treat and be like, you don't get these whenever you want them. This is a special thing. Because I was a fat kid and I want to instill proper food relationships with kids. but I'm not going to take that militant attitude and make everyone else subscribe to it. Well, it also gets to the forbidden fruit theory of, you know, if you make something, you tell your kid. Clear your throat. I guess you had too many Oreos for breakfast. Yeah. If you tell your kid that they can't have something, well, that's just going to make them want it more.

9:43 That's right. And I'm not saying they can't have it at all, but just. you know, but much like reason moderation, like with, with you and what you're talking about, it's not Oreos that are the issue. It's the moderation. That's an issue. Moderation is, is a, been a problem with me in my entire life. It's like if I like something, I want all of it. Please, tell the recovering alcoholic about problems with moderation. Oh, yeah. I know who I'm talking to. Trust me. I read the room. I know there is a level of relatability between you and me on a whole other level. But that's also... That's also the same reason why I never got into drugs is because it's like, look, I like all the things. Right. So I know it's best for me to just stay away from that.

10:28 Listen, I've never done coke for a reason is because I always knew I had an addictive personality. Just booze snuck up on me. But I mean, there's a reason if I bake cookies, I give 90 percent of them away because I know I will eat all of them. That's right. You know what the best thing is? Like there's a reason why. stereotypically chefs are fat, right? It's because they have to taste everything as they go. That's one of my favorite things about cooking, especially holiday cooking. If I'm smoking a turkey or deep frying the turkey or steaks on the grill or something, and you're carving it up afterwards, you get the nibbles before everybody else gets it. And then when someone says, hey, stop eating that, I say, oh, whoa, whoa, I cooked it. This is quality control. And in order to quality control, I need to eat an entire deep fried turkey thigh. Basically, this all comes down to, is it okay for you as a parent to tell all the other parents what to do with their kids so your kid and you ultimately feel better about your decisions? Absolutely not. It's asinine to me to think that other people would be like, you know what, if Karen doesn't want her kid to have Oreos and therefore doesn't want me to put Oreos in my kid's lunch, then I'm going to respect that.

11:58 Yeah, again, and I would at least understand the request if we were talking about a food allergy that was potentially harmful to the kid. But otherwise, F all the way off. Look, I mean, I get it. I've been on a plane before where a child was on the plane and the flight crew announced, because of this severe peanut allergy, we don't have certain snack options available to you. In the golden age of Southwest Airlines, they just handed out peanuts. And then the food allergy people put a stop to that. Yeah.

12:42 I know, and this is a weird place to be in because on one hand, I don't want that kid to die, but I really wanted some goddamn peanuts. Especially when they were honey roasted. I know, it's the good ones. Oh, God, so good. It'd be like, what is it, American or Delta, they hand out the little Biscoff cookies or something. If they were to say, sorry, no Biscoffs because they got peanuts in it and we can't have it, I'd be like, You show me where they are. I'll come to them. That's half the reason I booked this airline. When you're sitting in the big seat on Spirit Airlines, you could get your pick of their little snack tray, which wasn't bad. It really wasn't bad. And I'll tell you right now, the peanut allergy airline was not Spirit. Spirit did not give a, pardon the pun, a flying fuck about your kid's peanut allergy.

13:29 They would charge you extra. That's right. And they would charge you more for the epinephrine shot. Huh? You can't break glass in case of an emergency if you need an epinephrine shot. Instead, it was swipe, then you could open the door and take it. You have to pay for it. Everyone in the chat is saying, yeah, absolutely. I would send more cookies to school. Linda's just showing off that she's eating a giant cupcake. How dare you, Linda? You know what? Real quick, though, that's the beauty of adulthood, is if one morning you wake up and you want a cupcake for breakfast, then By God, you eat it. That's right. There's also kind of the conundrum, though, for me. It's like.

14:15 The age when you're a kid and into your 20s, that's when you really should be enjoying those things like Oreo cookies and the fast food and the gym because that's when your body can handle it the most. Not enough, obviously, to be detrimental to your health down the road, but that's when you can handle that the best. And so, you know, telling the. Kid, I want you to have Oreo cookies because I'm trying to instill in you healthy eating. You've got to make up for that sometime. But here's the thing. In reality, an Oreo cookie has so little to do with healthy eating. That's such a much broader subject. We just now changed the food pyramid from what was completely just stupid. I'm not trying to get political one way or the other, but the old food pyramid was absolutely ridiculous.

15:09 Ketchup counts as a serving of vegetables. Yeah. Well, and not only that, and to me, the food pyramid was political in nature, but not in a, you know, right and left type of way. Everyone got to share the blame on that one because it was straight up the food industry. Yeah. Lobbying and saying, here's your new food guide. And all the politicians, all of them, R's and D's and I's and F up's. All of them are like, okay. And the next thing you know, we have this upside down food pyramid. You looked at what the majority of crops were and then what was the base of the food pyramid? You know, wheat, corn, bread, all the, all the stuff, which I love, but that's not, that's not the foundation for a healthy diet. And seriously, you look, go look. I mean, I was at Kroger yesterday and And I hate to see it, but you go follow a fat person around the grocery store and you'll understand why they're overweight.

16:13 I've heard somebody say it, that one of the best ways to shop healthily at the grocery store is to stay out of the. Middle of it. Yeah, you stay on the perimeter. On the outside perimeter, yeah. Also, the best tip I can give you is don't go hungry. And look, I know we all should know this at a certain age. And we've all made the mistake, even as an adult. I occasionally still make the mistake, and I leave the store regretting it. I'm like, God damn it. Don't ever go to the store hungry. And if you haven't eaten something, here's another additional little trick. When you go to the store, if it just wasn't possible, the first thing you do, go in there and buy like a liter of water and chug that. Chug the water so your belly will feel a little full, and you won't be as tempted to get the stuff you don't actually need. At least it not only hydrates you, but it also fills your willpower bank just a little bit. It's one of the great things about Costco.

17:12 You can pop in there and eat a couple of slices of pizza or have a dog, and then you can shop. And that way you're not hungry because you go to Costco hungry, you're in trouble. On the other hand, I've gone to Costco hungry on purpose because I'm going to eat today. Oh, yeah, the sandwich. Yeah, exactly. Going on Sunday at about 11 a.m. I also noticed this the other day. So you know the show My 600-lb Life? Mm-hmm. Now there's a new one I just saw on my guide on my TV, My 1,000-lb Sister. It's like, Jesus Christ, did no one talk to them yet about healthy eating? These shows are getting more extreme. It's like it started with 600-lb Life. Now we're going to 1,000-lb Sister. There's 1,000-lb Sisters.

17:55 There's 1,000-lb Roommates. Like I it's we glamorize. I mean, there, there is a guy, uh, on Tik TOK. His name is like James Bola, I think. And anyone familiar with big pun, the rapper that died. Yeah. Okay. Did you ever see what he looked like before he got fat? I don't remember. You should Google it. He, he actually played linebacker. I think he played linebacker at Miami. Or he was drafted. Like, he was built. Damn. This guy's the same way. This guy used to be, you know, in shape, everything else.

18:37 And then, and this is where, and it speaks to so many other social issues. People don't give enough credence to the fact that people will do anything to be popular on social media. Because this guy has a ton of followers now. He eats butter straight. His breakfast, he will eat two packages of Oreos in a bowl with whole milk. Like it's cereal. All right. That sounds good. Like they they've, they've counted in one meal. This guy will consume like 7,000 calories.

19:19 Except he's not jumping in the pool like Michael Phelps. Right. Um, Yeah. And look, you're 100% right, Trey. Now, I will say this, that goes back to some type of a mental health thing. And it's almost like you were saying, like with alcohol, alcoholism kind of snuck up on you, right? And I think the food thing and the social media thing is similar to alcoholism. The door opens a little bit and you go through and then you get the feel good dopamine stuff. And then it grows over time. And then you end up basically addicted to it. I don't think it's, I think it's, I think a lot of, for a lot of people, it's a decision.

20:03 I don't think it sneaks up on them. Like this guy, he started doing food videos, like, the hashtag mukbang, I think is what it was. And, uh, and then he got more and more popular for basically overeating and obviously he monetized it. So instead of doing it responsibly or anything else, I mean, hell there's, there's a chick on Tik TOK that does eating competitions where she goes to these places that, you know, like the 72 ounce steak and Amarillo and, uh, She just travels the country doing that. I mean, she's got a ton of followers, but she's skinny. I've seen her. Yeah. This guy, I mean, it's just, it's disgusting to watch him eat.

20:49 So let's go from Mama Karen in the Oreo, you know, group chat. And now let's shift over to another discussion of food. And that is, how to deal with people stealing your food at work. Now, this is something that we've all dealt with numerous times in our professional lives, especially because a radio station break room is a cesspool for free food and food lurkers, food murchers. Sorry, food moochers. That being said, we're talking 20 years ago. When I'm starting out in radio, 20, 25 years ago, almost 30 years ago now, a good portion of my diet where I got food was in the radio station break room because back in the day, food places were dropping food off in the radio station all the time. That's how Chipotle got big, by the way. They kept dropping off those mega-sized burritos at the radio stations, and we all got on the air and talked about how big these burritos were. And that was how I had food in my belly some days.

22:03 Mm-hmm. I remember that. The good old days. But yeah, yeah. Now it's a little more sparse. Anyway, so let's get Daniel Cook from Cook DFW Roofing and Restoration into the treehouse. 833-COOK-DFW is the phone number to get your free roof inspection and property review scheduled. The website, cookdfw.com. I'm going to say some scary words, Daniel. Super L- And the effect that is going to have on weather, especially in the North Texas area. You know, you're right.

22:45 We just are officially in going into the Super El Nino. The reason why is because it's warmer than a regular El Nino. And it does prelude that we will have a wetter, higher rain percentage than than a normal year. Or should we say on El Nino? So there are some differences, speculations. Nothing is set in stone. This is not a guarantee that we're going to have a deluge of water for the next year. I mean, that's just not what it means. Scientific data says, hey, we might have a wetter than normal. We could have more storms. It could be just a lot of rain. We all need to go out and build arcs. I don't know. But, I mean.

23:26 Be prepared. The moral of the story is every day you live in North Texas, especially in North Texas, be prepared. Know how your home is sitting. Know how your roof looks. Know how your windows are working. Know if your doors have holes in them. I mean, just know your home. Know your home. Call us out. We want to educate you. We will come around, walk you around, show you things that you should know, and then we can help you with getting them taken care of. And no pressure, all education. And Daniel and his fine team at Cook DFW will take care of you, the homeowner. With very, very gentle hands. I know because I've been in them. 833-COOK-DFW. That sound bad? Sounded bad. 833-COOK-DFW. Get that scheduled today. The website, cookdfw.com. In those break rooms, if you had something good coming in, the mass email would go out. and everyone showed up in the blink of an eye. It was like Doctor Strange with the sparkle circles in Endgame. Everyone just showed up at the same frickin' time. It was like Food Avengers assemble in the break room.

24:33 People you couldn't find with a scout team any other time of the day, but when food got to the break room, appeared, like you said, yeah. Like. The end scene in Endgame where all the portals open up and they all rush in. And it really was like you're looking around at these people you haven't seen in months and you're saying, Hargett, I thought you died. Uh-huh. And he's just back. It's like, oh, it's a bluebell ice cream party. Everybody shows up. But. And then just regular break room stuff, though. It's like you've got, like, if you're trying to eat healthy or whatever, you've got your food, you're bringing your lunch because you're working in radio or you work in a corporate job, you haven't had a raise in years, so maybe you're bringing your lunch. You're trying to eat healthy or save money.

25:24 You bring your food to work and then some a-hole eats it. Which is exactly the story that Trey has for us today. So, yeah, this woman, she posted on Reddit. Evidently, it's since been taken down, but She said, you know, am I... This was an am I the asshole section. Said she works at a fairly large company, but they have their own little, you know, refrigerator. And said never had a problem with people taking my stuff until there was like a merger and like these 10 people came in to their group. And all of a sudden, things started disappearing.

26:05 And so one day... one lady told her, oh, hey, I saw so-and-so eating your strawberry jam. And she goes, oh. She goes, oh, that's a shame. And the woman goes, well, just because you're stealing your food? She goes, no. She goes, well, I double dip and I have herpes. I think she's sorry. She goes, I get cold sores all the time. Yeah, you got herpes. Right. Yeah. And She basically was asking, and obviously that got around, and she was like, what am I to ask? She goes, I really don't have cold sores, but I wanted it to stop. And I'm like, hey, bravo to you. How did we never think of that?

26:52 That is awesome. I love that. Good on her. How did we never think of that? I don't know. I did it with office supplies. I don't know why I never thought about that. I mean, obviously not the herpes thing. You just write this as a left-handed thing on something and nobody will ever touch it. That is true. That is absolutely true. I labeled all my stuff left-handed. Left-handed scissors, left-handed pens, left-handed stapler. I'd leave it out on my desk. Nobody would ever touch it. I don't typically do this, but I can't resist. Is that how Ben and Skin stay employed? They just put left-handed on their show?

27:33 Left-handed microphone. Left-handed microphone. We can't. No, that's just too much. That's too much trouble. Left-handed content. I do love this, though, in the chat. People stealing your food out of the break room, right? Double AJ in the chat says, I never had this problem. It sounds like something that would be easily resolved with a claymore. Is that pie? Oh, good lord. I take no issue with how she handled that. I think you absolutely, you know, if someone takes something that is not theirs, stealing, They need to be taught a lesson. That simple. I remember one time in the radio station break room, I had these, the Jimmy Dean Delights breakfast sandwiches, right? Because I'm trying to eat well. It's not the normal Jimmy Dean breakfast sandwiches in the freezer. It's the light ones. And I have my name on them and everything. So everyone knows they're mine. I go in one morning to get my breakfast sandwich for breakfast. And the box is empty. The box is left in the freezer. Empty. Just to add insult to injury. Except for the note. On the inside

29:05 of the box. Hey, Dan, I'm sorry. I was starving last night. And this was the only thing in here. Torres. And I was immediately... I was immediately okay with it because I knew he got paid dirt and he was desperate and he left a note. So on one hand, I was pissed because now I had to figure out my breakfast, but I gave him credit for leaving. a note and I knew that he did it out of desperation and I totally understood it. I was like, you know what? That's the only choice he had. That's fine.

29:49 Good for him leaving the note. So I was, I was mostly fine with it. And I thought it was hysterical because he left such a sad note and he signed his name to it, but he left it in the box. It's like I told him, it's like, dude, you could have just sent a text message giving me the heads up. He's like, well, I didn't think about that because it was late. He was doing like a late night shift. I think that was when we were doing mornings. Yeah, but that had been Ted McKay. You probably would have popped a cap in his ass. No, Ted McKay could do whatever he wanted. Oh, had Torres taken the food from Ted McKay? No. I had Ted McKay taking it from you. What about Domino?

30:29 Oh, I'd have chucked him off the roof. Along with his leather vest. Yeah, no, there are some people that would have done it. Note or not, you're going off the roof. The random burrito eater. There was one day, I'm not sure if you were still there when this happened, but God, what's his name? He did He was sort of a side character. He did traffic on the ticket for a while. His name started with a D. He worked for TTN. Doyle. Doyle King. I had an issue with Doyle King. I'm trying to remember the specifics of it, but one day in the break room, he had come in and he had thrown all the food in the break room away. He took it upon himself to clean the break room. Which would have been nice had that stuff been there for a really long time. But see, what had happened was Bluebell had come in with their new flavor for us to try.

31:39 And for us, I mean those of us on the show. We did it separately so Dr. Strange's sparkle circles wouldn't show up and everyone rushes it and then we can't taste what we're supposed to taste, right? So we did it in phases. Phase one, Those of us on the show tried the ice cream. Phase two, Golden Perry, the executive assistant for iHeartDFW, would send out the mass email inviting everyone to the break room to enjoy the ice cream party from Blue Bell. In that time, Doyle had gone to the break room and thrown all of it in the trash. So then all these people show up and there's no ice cream. And I went on a war path. Like, who did this? And then they said it was Doyle King. And I went into TTWN's offices like I was on SWAT. Like, I'm kicking in their dorm like, where's Doyle? Where is this Jack? And I don't think he was there or something like that. So I don't even think I ever got a chance to actually visually confront him. And because of that, I took his photo from his ID badge and I printed it off.

32:57 And I posted it around the break room. And then I posted it around the entire radio station offices saying, do not feed this man. This man gets nothing. It may have been something else on there, but that's the general gist of it. He was persona non grata in the tree house. Wasn't there also an ice cream party where he was specifically not invited? Thank you for that reminder, Jerry. Yes. And in honor of Mr. Doyle King, we threw a second ice cream party for everybody except for Doyle King. And that was a mass email I sent out. That was how petty I went on that MF. Man, it felt good. How dare you throw away God's greatest ice cream gift to this planet. and the thing is he did it out of spite because he was so mad at people not cleaning up in the break room he just thought we all left it and just threw it away just made a huge assumption despite the fact that my office is right next to the break room he could have just come and said hey what are you doing and that I could have told him people are coming don't touch it but instead he was spiteful about it and then I double spited him back.

34:18 So you were the Kendrick Lamar at Bluebell he was No, you were. I don't get it. Never mind. Oh, wait. Sorry. Yes. Now I get it. Yes, I was. Yes. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. They ain't like us. I had a different person in my head for some reason. All right. So that's the level of my pettiness. That was probably the biggest one in radio. So still to this day, F you, Doyle King, and you're throwing away of stuff. He never came and talked to me about it either. Let's move on. Today is, for those that are hearing this on the regular audio version of the Treehouse Show, today is Thursday, September 3rd, 2026. Let's celebrate today with some birthdays.

35:11 One second. Hang on, I got to scroll down to my birthdays. All right. Still scrolling, still scrolling. Jesus, the prep service is hot today. Oh, wait, that's today's birthdays. Hang on. Stall for a second. We're doing the live stream and I need to do tomorrow's birthdays. You know, typically when one segues to another segment, they have said segment ready. Well, see, I thought I did, but then I didn't. So that's what happened.

35:52 I mean, we have people watching the show that expect us to be slick. Oh, they haven't been around very long. That right there is up there with Jerry saying, have fun in Mordor. All right, hang on. Okay. Now it's time for birthdays here inside the treehouse. Thursday. Thursday. September 3rd 2026 despite his best efforts charlie sheen is 61 today that's impressive at a certain point you just kind of got to tip your hat and be like i'm good on you.

36:39 Did anyone anyone watch the documentary he came out with a year or two ago. I did not i just i i didn't care I got sucked into the whole tiger blood nonsense when he was going through that drug fuel phase. We all went to American Airlines Center to see the traveling circus that was that show. And I don't even think we stayed, what, 30, 45 minutes? We were like, this is dumb. We're leaving. But yeah, I mean, it's such a weird thing because you're talking about someone who is extremely talented. from an amazing Hollywood family, his dad, Martin Sheen. He's done some of my favorite projects in Hollywood history. Garbage Man. Minute Work, Trey.

37:28 Minute Work, sorry. Minute Work is a phenomenal movie. I don't disagree with you there. And that is a trash heap I will die on. He also was in one of the greatest baseball movies of all time, Major League. Young Guns. Young Guns. And, I mean, I never really watched it, but his sitcom, Two and a Half Men, obviously incredibly popular. I mean, he pissed, talking about pissing away, you know, a run. And a fortune. The, I'm actually surprised because I would have figured Two and a Half Men would have been like right up your alley, Trey. You might, you should watch it. It's very good. It's crass in a lot of areas, which, which we like a lot. I.

38:14 It's not a, Not like a decision I made to not watch it. I just have never really taken the time to watch it. Yeah, I might give it a whirl. So I'll give you the quick premise of the show. Charlie Sheen's character lives in L.A. He's a womanizing jingle writer. And his desperate chiropractor brother and kid come to live with him. It's pretty good. Then he ruined it. and then, uh, and then he was able to have a semi successful followup with anger management. Uh, I think that was on FX. Uh, but yeah, this is, it's interesting. You see a different careers are up, down, up, down, up, down. And Charlie Sheens is obviously one of those. And then earlier in his career, also one of the greatest war movies of all time, platoon, and then opposite Michael Douglas and wall street.

39:10 That to me, by the way, is I think probably the greatest example of what the eighties were like. Uh, Well, what are the other great 80s movies? Navy Seals. Oh, amen, brother. Oh, I love that movie. That is so good. Trust me with your money and your life, not your wife. I'm pretty sure that the actual Navy SEALs probably have that stapled to a wall somewhere. Garrett Hedlund is 42 today. He was one of the running backs in Friday Night Lights. He was in Tron Legacy, Four Brothers, and he was in Country Song. This is one of those guys, if you don't recognize his name and his face immediately, when you see his face, you'll be like, oh, okay. If you saw the Friday Night Lights movie, he was the kid that played Tim McGraw's son.

40:08 Okay. Costas Mandalore is 61. He's best known as Mark Hoffman in the Saw franchise, but some of us know him also as the guy who was almost Joey in Friends. If you remember in one of the episodes of Friends where Joey decides to go in for an experiment with a twin, he grabs one of these other actors at one of his auditions that looks like him, and it was Costas Mandalore. The reason why they had him on their radar for Friends is because this was a guy that I think had the role or was up for it alongside Matt LeBlanc. Matt LeBlanc got the role. His career and life took off. Costas Mandalore, eh, not as much.

40:52 But then he ended up in the Saw franchise, so it wasn't totally terrible. Kaia Gerber is 25. She, in her own right, is a model and actress, partly because she is the daughter of Cindy Crawford and Randy Gerber. Hollywood looks so much like her mom. It's unbelievable. I think I saw a video of her getting out of a car on social media last night. And I genuinely thought it was Cindy Crawford. I was like, Oh my God, Cindy Crawford looks amazing. It was like, Oh, Cindy Crawford's daughter is like, Oh, okay. And Cindy Crawford does still look amazing. They could easily put her in front of a Pepsi machine again and Pepsi sales will go up. Yeah. She, we were talking about Salma Hayek yesterday. Cindy Crawford's another one where, And she's in her 60s now.

41:35 She still looks fantastic. Clearly, that skin cream she's been pimping for years works. Yep. Or it doesn't, and it's just because it's going on freaking Cindy Crawford. Meanwhile, the skin cream is like, man, that really paid off, guys. Good job. Meanwhile, the ones that were doing stuff with Kathy Ireland, like, ooh, I think that was a myth. Yeah. It's a good thing we put her face on furniture. That's actually it for some of the big birthdays. Oh, actually, there are actually a couple of interesting birthdays here in the sports world.

42:17 Jenny Finch, Olympic softball gold medalist, is 46. Sean White turns 40. Three-time Olympic snowboarding gold medalist, also known as the Flying Tomato. He turns 40 today. Good for him. as I do one more scan, and Damon Stoudemire, just for the hell of it, Damon Stoudemire is 53 today, and that just, for some reason, makes me feel old. It's like, how is Damon Stoudemire 53? Damn. Former NBA Rookie of the Year, nicknamed Mighty Mouse. Ah, yeah. Okay, speaking of sports, a pair of former Dallas Cowboys have made news, not because of anything good, but all because of things bad. So Tony Romo was arrested for operating while intoxicated a while back. And he initially denied any wrongdoing, heavily denied it in the body cam video.

43:19 And then when more body cam video came out of him doing stretches in the garage for his roadside sobriety testing, we all thought, oh, that man's going to jail. And so he pled no contest to his operating while intoxicated charge in Wisconsin, which was probably for the best. His attorneys probably said, Tony, we watched that tape and we think it's best that you plead no contest. And so he did. But he also did the other smart thing, and that is he made sure to post a long missive on social media talking about the reason why. he was drinking that day. And that is because of multiple back surgeries from his NFL days. He had gained an addiction to pain pills and to help get off the pain pill addiction. He overcompensated with alcohol, something Trey knows all too well, being sober for 10 years. These are things I'm sure you hear about in Alcoholics Anonymous all the time.

44:25 Yeah. That being said, that being said, uh, problems do not equal excuses. He is taking responsibility for it. It's funny. Tiger Woods just pled out his DUI this morning. Talk about someone who is... You can tell back surgeries have wrecked him. The painkill thing, like you were about to say, that is a serious blight on this country. The medical industry, health insurance, and the pain pill, the prescription first mentality. It's dangerous. And as you can see, it leads to other problems in addition to its own problem. Did you guys read Tony's statement?

45:17 I did not. It's really long. I won't bore you with all the details, but basically he takes responsibility, says, hey, look, playing football hurts. And I took pills and then I tried to stop taking the pills. So I drank some. And now I'm working with a team of doctors to get me the help I need. Thank you very much, Tony Romo. Well, the other thing about that is which. His other passion, which is golf, not good for the back either. Look, it's been like three or four years since I've gone to Topgolf because of a back issue. And I didn't play quarterback in the NFL for as long as he did. Like, I'm a little stiff getting out of bed in the morning, but I mean, I wouldn't even just pick up a sand wedge at Topgolf because my lower back was killing me so much a few years ago.

46:11 I can't imagine what it takes to actually play golf at a high level that he does in order to get to your baseline to take the pain pills to be able to swing like that. So I get it. I hope he gets the help that he needs, and I think he will. That being said, he's not the only former Dallas Cowboy making headlines in bad ways. Emmitt Smith, NFL legend, Dallas Cowboys Ring of Honor member, all-time leading rusher in the NFL, has been implicated in a Ponzi scheme. Oh, no. This one fascinates me because the first thought you have is, you shouldn't need money, dude. Why are you doing a Ponzi scheme? And then when you get a little more of the details on it, you start to think, well, maybe it's not so much him directly. It might be an association type of a thing. So there's a I'm trying to stall here. I'm trying to pull up the link here. He was implicated in like a two and a half or three million dollar Ponzi scheme that I believe they're saying they were using him as an endorser slash spokesperson to then use to get others to join into the scheme. Right. So now this is not a criminal thing. This is purely a civil deal right now. Yes, Trey.

47:43 I honestly, as far as Ponzi schemes go, you say two and a half, three million. That's really nothing. Mm hmm. I know. I'm used to the Bernie Madoff stuff. If you're not pushing hundreds of millions of dollars, is it really a Ponzi scheme? Or is it just like, I'm just trying some pyramid scheme? Yeah, you're Amway. Exactly. Who wants pampered chef? But yeah, I mean... I'm always fascinated when former athletes who made lots of money in their careers get implicated in certain things that's money-related. Because those of us who never had that level of fame, success, and money, we're like, why would you do something so seemingly stupid with it?

48:42 Now, granted, he did not make the money that they do now, but he still... you feel like should have been well off. And, and he's, I can't, I can't see him actually taking part in a Ponzi scheme, but I can certainly see him like so many other celebrities, athletes, whatever, that their entourage, you know, put him in the middle of something that he didn't really know what he was getting into. Yeah. Emmett Smith is accused of cheating a native American investor out of two and a half million dollars. He allegedly used money meant to fund a Texas solar project to instead pay back a company that had previously invested in his ventures. The lawsuit filed Monday in Delaware's Chancery Court from Kittewa LLC, the tribally owned investment and economic development arm of the Eastern Band of Cherokee Indians. It claims the former Cowboys running back is longtime business partner David Mosley. and their commercial real estate company, 413 Solutions, Inc., convinced Kitawa to provide a $ 2. 5 million loan for the purported solar project. However, Kitawa says it has not received a penny despite the loan being more than two years past due and numerous requests for repayment. So again, this is a civil thing. It's a lawsuit. He's not being implicated criminally in this. But, you know, Emmett Smith, Ponzi scheme, $ 2. 5 million.

50:09 It does make a lot of headlines. I mean, is it a Ponzi scheme or just a bad investment? That's what it sounds like to me, yeah. That's a fair question. Speaking of bad decisions, I think it's probably in your best interest, everyone, not just you, Trey, not just you, Jerry, not to do business with someone called Crooked Jess. if you're going into any sort of a deal and the person you're going into that deal with is known as crooked Jess, anything you do, I feel like is, is kind of your fault here.

50:49 Especially if, uh, where does crooked Jess reside? Florida. Yeah. I, I am. Yeah, a buy and bust operation went bust after Florida police entrusted Jessica Crooked Jess Straubel with $ 60 to score some crack cocaine. As an undercover officer watched, Crooked Jess walked over to a St. Petersburg residence that facilitates transactions for illicit narcotics and disappeared into the property's backyard. Surprisingly, Crooked Jess did not return with the crack. After an hour... The deputy concluded that Crooked Jess had no intentions of coming back to facilitate the transaction and had deprived me of my money for her own use. Come on, officer.

51:39 Well, here's my... Okay, I understand they're doing an undercover sting, and we're just talking about $ 60, but it really doesn't look good on the police department that they lost the person that they gave the money to. for months. It took them months to track down Crooked Jess. How? How does it take that mug to track down Crooked Jess? When you see her mugshot, you would think, even though it's Florida, she would stand out. A little bit, and I'm going to show you the mugshot here. Give me just a second. Here's this, and that, and here. Here's Crooked Jess. Okay, first of all, How do you have a hard time tracking that down? I feel like it'd be easy to track her down because she would leave a wake of cracked and broken flock cameras behind her.

52:38 Yeah, I think just go to wherever the local meth park is. You're going to find Crooked Jets. The local meth park? I'm just assuming Florida, they've got, you know, meth crack parks. Look, it is interesting how the U.S. is developing. I mean, in our Super Plus episode, we're talking about California publicly funding jerk-off huts, and in Florida, they've got meth parks. Now, I will say this. Crooked Jess is not an attractive photo taker. She might be beautiful in real life. Sorry, I couldn't finish the sentence. This is obviously not a glamour shot of her. She didn't choose this. This is a mug shot. She may look completely different in the light of day. I don't know. But I do know, Trey, that you're a pretty good looking fella. And so when you updated your profile photo recently, I thought, oh, Trey looks pretty good. He looks professional. He's wearing a polo.

53:41 He has unveiled his new one person's treasure business. And he's got a new professional profile photo to go along with it. And then someone deep down in the comments couldn't help but say, Ooh. Yeah, that was, uh, they, uh, I forgot exactly what they said. It's Katie. Yeah. Katie Muck. Yeah. She goes, you know, you're better looking, you know, AI didn't do you justice. You need to take a better picture. Your skincare. I know your skincare routines better. Like, damn. No, I, I, Only thing I had AI do to that picture was take the background out. And like, you know, Katie, I am painfully well aware. I have aged a lot in the last six months. You know, sorrow does that to you, but didn't need you telling me that.

54:39 To me, that's right up there with like, whenever someone says, sorry, if you find this offensive or sorry, sorry, if it's like, don't, don't, you're going to say it anyway. Don't apologize on the front end. But she didn't even. Did she say sorry first or she just go like, oh, no, she. Didn't hear all. See if I can pull this up so I can show the class. I mean, she did. Everyone's everyone in the comments on Trey's announcement with his profile photo and his new business venture. And everyone's like, yeah, this. Is a great idea. I'm going to call you for this. And then out of nowhere, Katie slides into the comments, tags Trey. This is a fabulous idea and hope to be in contact soon.

55:21 But this is a horrible picture of you, darling, because I know from everything else that you take very good care of your skin and this is not you. Man, you just got bodied in the comments. Oh yeah. I was really, I don't take good pictures. And when I, so I took that picture and it was, I was fairly pleased with it. It was okay. Yeah. Katie. Katie from the top turnbuckle. We call this the humble elbow. Yeah. The elbow of age.

56:12 That'd be a good episode title. Katie from the top turnbuckle. Thanks for hanging out with us today inside the treehouse, especially to our ultimate treehouse subscribers hanging out in the chat live. Double AJ's on fire this morning for Crooked Jess's mugshot. He says, Olin Mills couldn't find lighting soft enough for her. Are we talking about her or me? You know what? Good question. We'll see if you get bodied in the chat yet again. We'll see you next time right here. Oh, good luck, Diego.