YouTube Ep 18 | Dear Treehouse | Don't Put Zyn Pouches In These Holes

0:01 It is time to leave your worries outside and laugh with us inside the treehouse. I'm Daniel Mallley along Raj Sharma and your host for our YouTube exclusive show, Tredy Trenholm. Thank you, Dan, Welcome Dan. I found something now. Actually this is really going to be more of a gen z what the fuck is wrong with them? But we have that amount of time, but we'll give it a shot. But in this context, you know, I also thought of you, Dan, all right. I wish I was kidding, but we need to talk about rectal zenning. Share this with.

0:48 Okay, the fuck man, I really don't like this association that you have created. Okay, Like it's one. Thing, it's a thing I've heard about this. Well, I'm less concerned about the rectal s inning right now. I'm curious about it, but not for that reason. I don't know anything about it. What I'm what I'm concerned with right now is how you keep making this association between anal play and me, and that ain't cool. It's also not true. I should probably mention that you just started with that that just keeps on giving and I can't get away from it because on one hand, I should be thoroughly offended, you know.

1:44 But. Giving. But if it's funny, I'm. Gonna back into it like you do. It's a constant struggle that I find myself in, which which is me as the person or me as an entertainer. Gotta grease yourself up for either. I wish I was kidding, but we need to talk about rectal zenning. Share this with somebody who you suspect has put one of these you nowhere, This see Dan, tis not the smarter, faster way to.

2:29 Get a buzz. And I can't believe there's something worse than four zen when you take substances. Remember that? Okay, hang on that just well, no, no, no, I'm focusing on something else. I'm the foreskin is not or the fore esen is not lost on me? For but is the zen in the rectal zinning? Is that the non tobacco pouch thing? Is? Is that? What that is? Yes? Got it? Okay? Like you didn't know, Rack, I. Don't keep up with all the tobacco or non tobacco trends.

3:13 You just didn't know what it was called. You just call it Tuesday, just hit play lee. You bypass something called first pass metabolism. That your livers built in filter. Without it, you absorb way more, way faster. It's the same reason people have ended up in the er from alcohol inemas. The same dose that you would take my mouth is going to hit you like a freight train. Now apply that to nicotine six milligrams in up your butt. That's not casual. That's a chemical gut punch. Literally, we're talking nausea, dizziness, heart palpitations, you might even faints.

3:58 Plus you don't want to lose a zen up there? Do you put yours on a string? All right? Well? Or is it just on the beads? Okay? First of all, I am not into assplayed the way that you guys seem to think I am. Despite all the funny punch lines throw ot over the last year plus, it's the second of it. It's more into. You see what I mean? You see? Do you see what I have to put up with? And then another aspect of this is I don't do tobacco products anymore. And when I did, as sure as hell didn't stick them up my butt because they went where they were.

4:40 I put them where they were designed to go, which was my mouth. If I did dip, it was going in my mouth. That's where it's supposed to go. When I smoked, I've smoked it through my mouth, that's where it was supposed to go. Occasionally I got drunken stuck one up my nose, sometimes two, but that's it. Nothing tobacco related. Everyone near my butt. This is a tobacco well non tobacco, but tobacco adjacent. Whatever this zen stuff is. I don't know what it is. I've seen the z yn and it looks like it's a tobacco pouch thing, but I guess it's not. And then it's a it's basically a nicotine pouch. Okay, it's a nicotine pouch, but no tobacco. Yes, So it's sort of like vaping. Like vaping, there's no tobacco, you're just getting nicotine and you know, strawberry, fruitcake whatever, smoke.

5:33 That it is the dipping form of vaping. See See this actually is a great metaphor for gen Z, is that the stuff we did, like actually smoking and actually dipping, had tobacco in it. Gen Z, they've foregone the substance but still are doing the other part of it. Like they're not smoking tobacco, they're vaping juice. That's like, And I know I know a lot of women that do the zen A lot of women. That's odd to me. But yeah, I mean like when when we did this stuff, when we dipped, it had tobacco.

6:14 When we smoked, it had tobacco, And now gen Z when they do these things, they don't have the tobacco. They're just going through the motions and I don't understand any of it. So, in other words, it lacks substance. I smoked. Get cancer like an adult, right. Get cancer like a goddamn Marlborough man. Should not the zen dude? Yeah, the zenbreo. That should be a zen bro, not a zen dude. Think about that. Just forget everything about life and generational conflict, right, and forget cancer and forget popcorn, lung and all these things. Okay, we got the Marlborough man on one hand and the zen bro on the other. Which would you rather be?

7:05 I'd rather be the Marlborough man. I know the Marlboro men smoked so much in during the shoots that the horse actually died of cancer. Somewhere. The zen Bro's like should have done this in. The horse actually died of I think I don't think it was lung cancer, but it was some sort of cancer because the shoots were closed back in the day, like you know, doing the promos for him. That's a lot of cigarettes. To kill a horse.

7:46 And he died of cancer as well, But I would think so. Yeah, my aunt, after my uncle passed away, when she remarried, she remarried the Marlboro Man and the actual yes, and he was a manly man. But and he did in fact pass away with cancer. Yeah, Trey, I've known you for like twenty years and I don't think I've ever known this about you. Well, it's not so not very close to My dad and his brother were not the closest of people, So. I don't give a fuck about that you were related to the Marlboro Man.

8:29 It's not really well fine, but question, did your aunt marry the Marlborough Man before or after the horse died of cancer? I ask because I want to know if he rolled the horse into the wedding. I do not know, but I'm going to assume before because I don't believe a horse was involved in the wedding. I wasn't invited to the wedding, so I don't know. Oh, well, I'm pretty sure if the horse from the ads had been involved, I think you would have at least heard about it. Yeah. Mine worked for RJ. Reynolds in Atlanta, and in their breakroom, like you know how like they have like you know, normal breakrooms they have like sandwiches and you know, muffins and stuff like that, they had platters of cigarettes and you could smoke in the building.

9:17 Oh. I have not smoked in a long time, but that sounds sweet just thinking back to twenty two year old me, going, man, that would be awesome. Well, the the screwy thing about this is having done both. Actually, I've dipped, I've smoked, I've vaped. Like vaping was harder to quit than smoking because the biggest thing with vaping is you can do it in so many other places that you can't smoke. Dipping, I said, if I had a pick of an addiction, I could have and not have any consequence for I would dip. That was my favorite thing.

10:04 But what was your go to dip? In the end, it was a skull mint pouch. I started off Copenhagen. I actually started at the top and then went down. Yeah, like a goddamn man. Yeah, like there's Marlborough Man and then there's Copenhagen. Tray. Oh, I mean Copenhagen is an art form. It is because it gets your teeth. Yeah. Well, I mean it's just it's so fine and you have to know like how to pack it and everything else. But and not only that, like packing it. Packing it was something I could never do because I can never I didn't have that finger dexterity to pack it with my finger, you know, like tray still got it. It's like riding a bike. You can snap it to today. But uh, where was I going with that dexterity? Oh?

10:49 Not only could Trey pack it like a champ, but he could dip while he drank and not and the two would not Like he wouldn't swallow the dip. The dip would stay where he wanted it, and the liquid could wash around it, through it, whatever, but that dip stayed where he wanted it in his mouth. Now that that is how you dip. That's a skill. Yeah. I was a skull of wooden green long cut. Yeah did that? I mean? Uh? And that was the scary. With the pouches, I could do, eat, drink, talk, whatever and keep it in my mouth for hours on end.

11:29 Right, are the kids today like the jen Alphas the teenagers Jen Alphas teenagers right now? Gen Z is all in their twenties, right correct? Okay, So is jen Alpha doing the Zen as teenagers like we were doing DIP as teenagers? I think so. The reason I ask is because like the Copenhagen finger where you can snap the can and pack it. So when I dipped, I was like fifteen, sixteen years old, and I did it like most guys my age because it was the baseball thing to do. And I only did it for like six months, But it's an amazing thing to think back to the nineties or a bunch of fourteen fifteen sixteen year olds up and down the dugout snapping their fingers and trying to hide the can in their bag as they pack it from their parents in the stands. But when you weren't packing the can, there would just be guys sitting on the bench between innings and like just snapping their fingers, practicing, and the parents.

12:28 Are just just clueless. As to what this thing was. I think, isn't that why they invented Big League two? Isn't that what it? That was? What that was for it. Was a gateway to tobacco. I thought it was a substitute. I don't know, but I. Started with I started with Big League two when I was like five. It eventually moved on to the heartstuff heroin but shredded. Yeah, I thought it was. I thought it was supposed to be like a little uh like to help you get away from And they even banned uh tobacco in uh major league baseball, right, I believe they did.

13:15 Yeah, yeah, but the. Big leagu chew. Yeah, it was well. It was also to keep kids like they wanted to be like their you know, major league heroes. Again, this is back in the day where baseball was far more popular than it is now. But yeah, so yeah baseball player, especially with do those big hunks at chew and people, you know, kids could do it with bubble gum and look like their hero. It was, yes, it was. It was so you could mimic the guys you watch on TV. Oh gotcha, Okay, I thought it was the other way around. No, And believe me, we did it. And I still remember the at the ball field. You'd go to the snack stand, the concession stand, and you could get the pouch of Big League Chew, which was designed intentionally for children to look like adults chewing tobacco, but great flavored.

14:09 That's the amazing thing about the eighties. It's one of the amazing things about growing up at gen X is the adults had the real version, and then we had the candy version as kids. We had we had big we had Big League Chew to look like chaw. We had candy cigarettes to look like actual smokes. Uh. And there's something else. Uh, the dip the dipping sticks kind of remind I never did heroin or anything, but it's like a scooping of something on a foil, and that necessarily, uh you know, correlates that's heroin. Damn. Yeah. The pixie sticks sort of like cocaine and you know, sweetness and a straw. There's something else that I'm that I'm forgetting about also, that we as kids had the candy version of the real stuff that adults had. I'll think of it.

15:03 At some point you were you were putting pixie sticks up your nose. Hey, you're supposed to eat it, not to snort it. Well, no, no, I I ate it. I mean, I know, I know you were born in Oklahoma. But good god, my beginning meth kit. You just go with the baseball doug out and some guy has just poured out his uh, his his stick onto a spoon and he's melting it down. Fisher Price my first meth uh. My first meth lab. God, I had it in my head and it's killing me now. It really did. Because as kids we had the candy versions of all of the real stuff that adults had, with the Big League Chew for chaw and now I've even forgot the other stuff since happened, candy cigarettes and else there's a big one of them. I'm forgetting what it is.

16:03 I remember they had the candy cigarettes that you could. Like puff on and then like kind of blow out and like powder would come out to look like smoke. Wow, I don't think I ever got those, Yeah, I. Mean did you, like, you know, some people had like the little Fisher Price, you know, little medical kit with this placed at the scope and I mean, were you tying your arm off and like. Practicing playing tourniquet. I remember the other thing. So it's big League chew that looked like chaw, the candy cigarettes that look like cigarettes, and then the ib C root beer that looked like a genuine beer bottle. There's three things right there that we had as kids that we looked like miniature versions of our parents. Smoking, dipping, drinking all right there, and you could get them all at the snack stand at the ball field.

17:09 Yeah, that's why my parents never put me in activities. Well, they didn't do any of that stuff. So they saw me doing any of that, I would have got my ass whooked. That was standard fair and drinking. Yeah. The only thing, the only thing my baseball dug out I was missing. The only thing my baseball dugout was missing was actual kids puffing on the candy cigarettes in the dugout. They just had actual cigarettes. There was There's always that one kid.

17:49 It's always the one guy. It's always the one guy. He's standing next to the manager. They're sharing smokes. He's like, here, you got a lighter. Here you go to me. His name Ms. John Cruck. I mean, and that's that's what I think, you know. I it sounds so stupid, but that you could actually when we were kids, I don't know, my dad would send me to the store with like a business card or a little note from him saying you know, please give him, you know, Carlton's and they would. Yeah, it was a magical time. It really was interesting when you think about it, because all this stuff that's been happening with the Stranger Things finale, you've got the younger generations posting on social media things like, let me get this straight. Back in the eighties, your parents just let you go on a bicycle not knowing where you were going for hours on end. Yes, not only that, but we were armed with candy versions of addictive substances.

18:56 Well not only let us encouraged it. Oh yeah, man, did it demanded it when I got When I got to the house, it was get out of your school clothes and go outside. And there was a corner store right at the end of my street. And we didn't have to Like a couple of people in the neighborhood like their parents smoked. There was no note needed. They just knew who the kids were. So my buddy like AJ and Sonny would you know my parents didn't smoke, but AJ and Sonny were like, Hey, we're going to walk down and grab you know, a candy bar or whatever it was, and a drink. And I got to get my dad's cigarettes and there was no questions asked.

19:36 It's like, hey, what's up kid, Hey. My dad needs a pack of you know, a marble red hundreds and done. And that's when it was. Like I think it was like a dollar ten for a pack of cigarettes something like that. And yeah, my. Dad was so lazy. Wait wait, wait, we have do the thing all right, say it again, Treydan Raju and I will do thing, Tray Goup. My dad was so lazy, lazy he sent me at twelve years old to drive seven mile We live seven miles outside of town, to drive seven miles into town with a note to go buy him cigarettes.

20:21 He had you drive, well, he stayed at home? Is he him? No, it wasn't the country. It was like, ah, it's the country. There are no rules. I mean there's laws, but there's no rules. How did you reach the like I wasn't. I was a small kid, like I had a growth spurt when I was thirteen. But how did you reach the pedals? Did you stand up and drive? No? It was uh trying to think. He had me take a jeep. The jeep so, I mean, it wasn't if he pulled the seat all the way up, could reach the pedals.

21:02 That's incredible. Wow. Country living is country living is a completely different world, Raja. I mean you grew up in Mesquite, which is country light because it's the suburb of Dallas and it's very hicified. But it ain't the country, no. But I also grew up with very you know, British men or parents you know that lived in London for twenty years, So there was no there was no possible way. I was taking a car I did. I never snuck out of the house. I never did that once in my life. When people are like, oh, I snuck out, I got through this and I went.

21:48 My parents said no when I rolled the car button. Never did anything like that. I will. This isn't the but at a future date, if y'all remind me to tell the story about how my dad caught me smoking. Oh how old, Oh gosh. It's probably fourteen thirteen, fourteen, okay, huh, but it's a good one. But for now, so one more little psa. Whatever you do, don't google this, especially if you're at work. It's gonna sound fake, but it's real. People have sent me the videos. Yeah, I went viral on Snapchat. That was a whole other thing. I didn't have the right settings on. They sent me all kinds of videos.

22:36 Don't do that. Make sure your settings are right. There are guys who have started I can't believe that I'm saying this. I've started putting zen pouches under their foreskin, not in their mouth at least. All well, good news, Drake. You don't have to worry about me doing that because I am circumcised. Oh me too. I was hoping you would give us some guidance on this. I know. If I'm going to go anywhere near this thing, then the only way I could do this would be if I just shoved it right in my ear. And I'm not doing that. Yeah, I'm good. I'm Jewish, So. All right, So there is no unshe thing inside the treehouse.

23:23 There's always Cherry. I had to say this, but I think I know that he's a key. I think I know he's cut. That's a weird thing to know. Yeah, there's lots of weird things I know about people that have been with this show for a certain period of time. But cut or uncut mm hmm. Not only that, but inside the treehouse there's two levels of cut or uncut one is whether or not they're circumcised. The other is whether or not they had a vast sectomy, and whether or not I saw that as well. Okay, so you saw a live of a sectomy, so it was true.

24:07 Two of them. Yeah, it's not bad, I mean they I mean it's it's very quick and it's a very small procedure. It's not very invasive at all. No, it's not. I mean we did it in the whole way as people were walking by, with clients going oh. H h, you've lost me. It was done at the radio station twice. Uh, once inside the studio and once just outside the studio in a little area that you could see from the studio. Just pants down, vast deference out. Medical procedure happening.

24:47 Yes, but I don't think that's legal. By the way, I'm pretty sure the doctor did that found out and so did the patient. Should have stayed with the four Zen for all things Treehouse. Go to Treehouse on Air dot com. Catch regular episodes of The Treehouse Show podcast everywhere you get your podcasts, and we will right here on YouTube. Be sure to like and subscribe. Thank you so much for hanging out with us. We'll see you next time, right here inside the treehouse.