April 9, 2026
Aging is a Pain In The ASS! | Thursday 04.09.26

We start off today talking about the feel good story of Artemis II and their arrival back on Earth on Friday. We then dig up an old blooper from WFAA's own Cynthia Izaguirre, learn why old men are shoving things up their ass, birthdays, and the dog should have been innocent until proven guilty!
LINKS:
Leave your worries outside and join Dan O'Malley, Trey Trenholm, and their hilarious guests for laughs about funny news and viral stories with ridiculous commentary inside the Treehouse Show.
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Want more Treehouse, check out our YouTube exclusive shows at
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YouTube dot com slash at Treehouse on air.
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Sorry, got a got a big situation, hap it It
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is time to leave your worries outside and laugh with
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us inside the Treehouse. I'm Daniel Malley along with Trey
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Trenholm and Jerry Caldwell and my bug.
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Yeah.
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Say, and for all the people that pay extra for
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the behind the scenes video and stuff, you're welcome.
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Yeah, you got it all right there? Uhh, Like I
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don't know what it is. I don't know if because
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like Tara and I right now, we're we're staying on
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Saint John at our crash pad, so it's a smaller
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space and we've got both cats and our dog and
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we're all in this confined space. Like as I look
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over my shoulder, you can actually see the little kitchen
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island cart with the you know, the the pam cooking
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sprays all over here. So because in our house on
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Saint Thomas, we don't typically let the animals in the bedroom,
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we just try we try to keep that as our space.
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So it's one of the cleanest places in the house
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when we're on our crack, when we're at our crash
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pad on Saint John. We're all basically in the same vicinity.
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We're all breathing the same air, and so I realized
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this morning, I think we're inhaling a lot more pet
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dander and fur than we normally do. So my bugs
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have been going crazy the last week and a half.
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I mean, wow, believe yeah, so wow. While Artemis is
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busy exploring.
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Space, you're exploring innerspace.
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I am. I am the Indiana Jones of my NAIs
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old cafvity. So anyway, yay, there you go. Uh speaking
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of Artemis, Okay, I haven't done a complete check in
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yet on it today, but I know we re established
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contact when they came around the dark side of the Moon,
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having gone farther than any human has before as far
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as distance, and they've sent back some amazing photos. And
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there was one photo that they sent back. I don't
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think it was necessarily of the dark side of the Moon,
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but it was of some crater. And when you type
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in moon crater to try to find an image that
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you saw before, there's so many of them. I can't
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find the exact one. The one that I saw, though,
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I think it was a real one, but it was perfect.
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It was almost like a holiday cookie cutter type diagram
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thing on the surface of the Moon, and I was like,
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is that a real photo? I mean, it was amazing
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because I've also seen photos that people are jacking with
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the flat earthers saying, hey, new photos from Artemis two
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and that's a bunch of floating discs. It's a bunch
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of float earth discs.
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Did you see the one with with like the earth
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looks like the snow globe on the turtle's back.
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Oh? Man, I had looked that one up.
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Awesome, that's all.
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That's so good. Oh but yeah, so, I mean, this
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is the hard thing about the day and age we
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live in is there's space exploration going on. They're sending
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us photos and videos and things, but then there's that
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we got some trolls in the middle of it, posting
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out other stuff that might be AI or photoshop or something.
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And occasionally, if you're scrolling social media, you're not exactly
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sure if you saw a real image or in one
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of those one of those fake ones that are just
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trying to mess with people. But yeah, so, like a
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lot of the photos I've seen that I think are
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real are obviously just stunning, and that one that had
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like that, it was almost like a perfectly symmetrical crater
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type thing, and it was so perfect looking. That's what
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made me think, maybe that's not real. I don't know,
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but still just one of the one of the few
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feel good stories of twenty twenty six. The Artemis two
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space mission.
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Yeah, it's it's been fascinating and and oh yeah, what
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they're going back will just I mean, I'm sure NASA
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is still analyzing a ton of stuff and as they
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release it.
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Yeah, it's just it's it's fantastic stuff.
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And is they're analyzing their photoshopping out aliens?
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Yeah, that pesky man in the moon.
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Yeah, but you stick your head back down. So when
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is uh, when is Artemis supposed to splash back down?
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What's the what's the timeline?
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Do I have?
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Friday evening?
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I think it's like seven oh seven Central time off
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the coast of California.
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Right, They've got like a two hour window in there.
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Now that the government is back to being mostly funded,
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does that mean they'll be able to get through customs?
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Okay when they splash back down?
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How does that work? Do you get? Yeah?
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Do you do you get a special lane from like
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lunar travels versus say, can kun.
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You're gonna have to take the space boots.
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Off, all right, So Friday evening, prime time, that's a
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great time to come back. I have a feeling that
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they probably planned that a little bit so everyone can
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watch them come home fingers crossed safely. Because this is
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this is the sort of the most crucial part when
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you think about it as far as the space mission.
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You've done all the main things and you just got
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one main thing left, and that's just get home safely.
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Yeah, And.
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Almost sixty years later, all the space missions, that still
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comes down to one thing.
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The heat shield.
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Yep, goddamn heat shield.
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Yeah.
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And that's that's the remarkable thing about artemis Is And
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you know, it's basically it's an enhanced design of the
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Apollo capsule, and that they were really good at the
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design back then, because that's still because at the end
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of the day, we don't produce an engine strong like
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you basically have to find the right angle and hit
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the gravity because you can't really fight. We don't have
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something strong enough to fight, you know, getting through the
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atmosphere of the burn.
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So you just just you're just there and you get
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the right angle and get through it.
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Yeah. And I learned that and retained that from the
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fantastic eighties movie Space Camp. Jerry, you remember that that
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was they had to hit they had to hit the
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exact right I shouldn't say right angle. They had to
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hit the exact proper angle yep for re entry, because
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if they don't and it's too steep, then they burn up.
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And if it's not steep enough, then they bounce off
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the atmosphere and probably blow up or something. So I
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remember that from Space Camp, which, by the way, if
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you've never seen Space Camp, I don't know if it's
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good as an adult.
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As a kid who cares, it's a core memory.
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Listen to the cast, a little Joaquin Phoenix, Tate Donovan
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who was kind of cool back then, Kelly Preston, the
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guy that played Lamar from Revenge of the Nurse. They're
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all in Space Camp. Oh, and Kate Capshaw also in
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that movie. Missus h missus Steven Spielberg.
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Uh Lamar from from Revenge of the Nurse. Because he
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was also in Iron Eagle.
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He was.
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Played some dichotomy of characters.
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The man's got range uh huh, and Jerry, Am I
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remembering this correctly? Leah Thompson also in Space Camp? Or
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am I conflating her with Kelly Preston? I think I am.
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Kate Keshaw, Leah Thompson, Kelly Preston.
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It is yep, Okay, I got it. That's a hell
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of a movie. It's also when I first fell in
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love with dire Straits. It's a really random pull on that.
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Just trust me. If you see the movie, it'll make sense.
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But yeah, I learned about the re entry through Earth's
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atmosphere because of Space Camp. It's got to be the
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right position otherwise you die. Right and now here we
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are Artemis two having to do the same thing in
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the twenty first century. At least we're consistent.
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That the the tiles that they're using are leaps and
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bounds better than even what they had on the very
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last Shuttle launch and reentry.
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Oh is it that porcelain tile that looks like wood flooring.
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That's good stuff, Yes, very durable.
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Yes.
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Would just love to see someone's face when NASA shows
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up at the tile off and be like, all right,
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so we need l a bunch of your tile here.
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What's a for rocket.
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Away?
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Okay, so we get splashed down, splashed down, seven o'clock
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Friday night, Primetime. Hopefully that goes well. Where are they
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supposed to be splashing down? Are they still splashing down
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or are they doing like the SpaceX rocket return? Are
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they just going to land on a platform?
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No? Still they splash down off the coast of California.
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Okay, yeah, it still takes too much fuel to have
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a thrust system to slow them down enough to land them.
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I love that while we're exploring space, we're still budget conscious.
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That's right.
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No, no, no, no, that's going to be too much gas.
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If you've seen gas prices, they're a little high lately.
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Things are happening in the Middle East. So I think
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it's better we just you know, parachute our way down
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and save the fuel.
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Still I don't think we I still don't think we
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build an engine that can do it. And it's one
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thing when when when you're when you're talking about these
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launches where those castles, engines, everything else come back after
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a low earth orbit. It's another thing when you're talking
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about full blown hurling back towards the Earth.
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You're right because right now the Orion where all the
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astronauts are. They're not in the rocket anymore. They're in
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the capsule, right exactly, So now he doesn't have a
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big engine on it, so got it right. You could
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still use the heat shield to slow them down to
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you know, merely terminal velocity, at which point you could
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then fire engines all that, but that would require a
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lot of fuel on board the actual capsule, which would
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be extra weight in the launch in the beginning. And yeah,
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so it is technically budgetary. So in terms that my
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non space brain can understand, they're on the rocket, and
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the rocket go take take off towards the Moon, and
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then when they get far enough beyond the atmosphere, then
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then the rocket goes away and then it's just the
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tip that we take the space.
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It's it's still very much the Apollo system of they
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stages get get the Oriyan capsule off and then ultimately
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ditch that and it's it's just the capsule like like
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it was in the Apollo.
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Missions, and then the tip comes back home, parachute splash down,
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fish them out right fingers crossed man. We need we
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need to win, We need a w we need to
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feel good, and that would be the way to make
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be a nice a nice bow on the last week,
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week and a half, a nice feel good moment, something
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to be proud of. Be like, ah, yes, we did something.
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Uh when is the next one supposed to be? Do
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we know next? Sure, it's on the schedule somewhere next Okay.
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Yeah, approximately a year from now.
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And then twenty eight is when they plan on landing
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on the Moon.
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Yeah, putting people on the moon?
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Yeah, do we know what they're supposed to do when
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they get there? Are they gonna do like a repeat
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of you know sixty nine with Apollo twelve or eleven?
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They've got a much better game plan.
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They're gonna they're gonna play pickleball instead of golf.
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Yes, on the Moon.
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All right, Well, we've had fun with that, and we've
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done something that Hollywood's been doing a lot of lately,
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that is, we rebooted a classic. We took our intellectual
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property of Going to the Moon and we rebooted it
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and we remastered it, and hopefully it all goes according
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to plan. There are some things in the past though,
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that I'm sure some of us wish would just stay buried.
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I'm a big fan of WFAA's Cynthia isigide. She's an
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outstanding anchor and has been for a number of years now,
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for a number of years now Channel eight in Dallas
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Fort Worth, and but.
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An incredibly nice person.
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I'm sure that she wishes this didn't exist, but the
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internet is forever, along with TV news.
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Bloopers view Eric wyhan Mayer who climbed the highest mountain
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