Dec. 4, 2024

Gettin Krampus | Wednesday 12.04.24

Gettin Krampus | Wednesday 12.04.24

We're still not sure where Raj is, and we're thinking about turning it into a game.  We start off today talking about human washing machines and the bad jokes that followed, then how much cleaning is too much?  Next, we discuss the Top 5 workplace...

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We're still not sure where Raj is, and we're thinking about turning it into a game. We start off today talking about human washing machines and the bad jokes that followed, then how much cleaning is too much? Next, we discuss the Top 5 workplace Don'ts, Krampus parade and festival, and what happens when a GenZ loses their cell phone.

LINKS:

Wild human washing machine promises to rinse you clean in 15 minutes | TechSpot

Swearing, Social Media and Salary Talk: Top Taboos for US Job Seekers

'Mama, PLEASE!': Atlanta Teen Seen on Video Erupting Inside AT&T Store After Mom Allegedly Disconnects Cellphone Service, Drawing Thousands of Shocked Reactions

The Treehouse is a daily DFW based comedy podcast and radio show. Leave your worries outside and join Dan O'Malley, Trey Trenholm, Raj Sharma, and their guests for laughs about current events, stupid news, and the comedy that is their lives. If it's stupid, it's in here.

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WEBVTT

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It is time leave your worries outside and come laugh

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with us inside the treehouse. I'm Daniel Malley, along with

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Trey Trenholm and Jerry called well today. It is Wednesday,

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December fourth, twenty twenty four. You are inside the treehouse

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and you are welcome. I have great news, guys, great

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great news to start the day. Japan is giving us

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new technology because they have unveiled a human washing machine.

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And that what a wife's for.

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Oh, should have seen that coming. We'll see you tomorrow

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inside the treehouse. M hm, bad host, Dan bad Posts

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should have seen that one coming, super obvious. Anyway, Japan

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is throwing new technology at us. A human washing machine

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is expected in twenty twenty five, not nineteen fifty five.

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Tray, so a robot wife.

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Okay, well then it is Japan, so that will actually

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track pretty well. This is a great example of one

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of the things that I live by. Okay, I have

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a few tenants that I live by, one of which

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is it's not just what you say, but how you

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say it. I'm a firm believer in how you say things.

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It's supremely important. And this is a great example of

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that because there's a couple different ways to read that,

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where you'd get different meaning out of it. I'll show

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you a human washing machine is coming in twenty twenty five,

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versus a human washing machine is coming in twenty twenty five.

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A human washing machine is coming in twenty twenty five,

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which leads Tray to think, well, we already have those.

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They're called wives.

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But this is.

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Versus a human washing machine is coming in twenty twenty five.

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No wife joke there, Well, I mean maybe there's still

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works for.

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Of a mistress joke at that point.

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Happened again. I should have seen that coming. We're just started.

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We can't stop the show yet. I don't care how

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funny you get, Drey. I say that, but you keep punching.

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All right. We might.

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Never say never, but let me actually get to this

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stupid story. A luxury bathwear brand in Japan is working

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on a new human Sorry now I need to do

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it myself, a new human washing machine to replace bathtubs.

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In English. The name literally translates to human washing of

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the future. It's based on a design someone came up

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with over a half century ago. An early version debuted

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at an expo in Japan in nineteen seventy, but this

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one's more high tech. Are we just imagining this expo?

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It's just a chicken address and this guy's trying to

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sell it like he's Tony Stark, Like, nah, man, you're

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not fooling us. The device itself looks like the cockpit

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of a fighter jet and fills with water, so it's

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like an enclosed tub. Oh hell no, uh huh. You

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were not getting me into a capsule that fills with

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water and calling it a cleaning device. No, they haven't

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really revealed a ton of other details, but apparently it

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uses microscopic bubbles to blast the filth off of you.

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Oh good, it's an encapsulated power washer that you can't

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get out of. Meanwhile, artificial intelligence tracks your vitals to

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make sure you're comfortable. Water tripperture is just right. Oh good,

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So now the machine knows where my threshold is and

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can mess with me.

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That's not at all what I I You know, thing

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that was from Japan. I was just thinking a robotic

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geisha with a good grip.

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I think that was more of a hope on your part,

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Tray than in reality. This machine will supposedly also dry

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you off, and the whole process takes about fifteen minutes,

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So it's faster than a nice soothe than a nice

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soothing bath, but it would still be quicker to just

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take a quick shower. They're unveiling the prototype at a

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conference in April, with plans to eventually sell them. No

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word on how much they might cost, while also keeping

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in mind you could just walk through a car wash

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with a with a snorkel tube who still takes baths.

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I have not taken a bath in years, So I'm

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with you, Katie takes him. Oh yeah, women, do I

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think train's talking about men?

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Well? Just I mean, it's one thing, you know, But

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the idea that you're getting clean by sitting in your

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own funk, that's always puzzled.

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Me, puzzles everybody. But it's we've been sold that it's

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relaxing and that it's good for you, and.

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Well it's it's a cooozy tub all that. Yeah, it's

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very nice and relaxing, but I don't I'm still if

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I were going to do that, I'm still going to

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take a shower to actually get clean.

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Yeah, because you are soaking in there, not just in

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the dirty bath water, but it's also your dirty butt water.

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I get it.

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You're you're protected by the soap? Are you the lies

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we tell ourselves? It's kind of like for a germophobe,

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it's got to be one of the worst things ever

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when your significant others already in the tub and say, hey,

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you want to get in with me, and you're like,

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oh no, you're disgusting bathwater. But that's why. One of

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the sickest things I still ever heard as far as

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a pickup line is a dude telling you, chick, I

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would drink your bath water. Mhm. That being said, I

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do look forward to someday when I'm in a nursing

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home and I get the spongebad. That's different.

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Or in the tree visit us online a tree house

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on air dot com. You're in the tree house. Visit

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us online a treehouse on air dut.

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You can talk back to us right here inside the treehouse.

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Go to treehouse on air dot com the little microphone

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lower right hand corner. Click on that. You can leave

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us a voicemail. So it's sort of like a like

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a tree mail, but it's a talk back inside the treehouse.

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So if you hear something you want to contribute to

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or just something you thought of, that you want to share,

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go to Treehouse on air dot com, look on the microphone,

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record that message and send it on in right here

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inside the treehouse. And we are back inside the treehouse.

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I'm Dan along with Trey and Jerry. What's the movie

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you guys were talking about in the break? I've this

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does not sound familiar to me. I was too busy

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watching really bad films to hear about this apparently good one.

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Silkwood the movie.

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It was Meryl Street. Yeah, an actual I want to

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say it was an Academy Award winning film from the eighties,

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at least I think it was nominated. Women that worked

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in a nuclear reactor, nuclear facility and if there was

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a leak, the decontamination process was you were stuck in

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a room that was obviously had the shower heads, but

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then these metal brush like steel wool brushes would scrub you.

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Uh.

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It's a brutal scene that I have. It's one of

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those things I still remember.

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So it's with them like basically naked getting brushed by

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steel steel wool because of radiation.

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Yeah, but it's one at a time.

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But yeah, they were they were like on brooms. They

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had long wooden handle, so that everybody could stay out

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of range, and everybody's in has mat suits except for

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the naked person being showered. And okay, I mean you

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know it's Meryl Streep naked and they're just they're really

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rooting a good time there.

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It's just, Yeah, I've not seen that movie, but I'm

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pretty sure I saw the Skinemac Chain Heat four version

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of it. At one point. I enjoyed mine. They made

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They made radiation cleaning look like fun m hmm. I

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think that's why the chains were a lot. Uh, speaking

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of long broom type things, Trey your single, So I

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don't know if you've if you've seen this with any

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of your past relationships, and if you've seen Daisy Year

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TWELVEA doing it, God bless her. Uh, Jerry, you live

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with your girlfriend Katie, So I'm wondering maybe if if

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this is gonna apply to you. So the other day

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I was I was at home, sitting in the office.

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I was doing some works and doing some recordings. The

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door was closed and I opened the door, come out

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and head towards the kitchen, and and that's when I

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see my wife doing something that I've never seen before.

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She had the long nozzle attachment of the vacuum cleaner,

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and she was vacuuming the knobs around the cook top

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range in our kitchen m hm. And our eyes met,

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and I walked back into the office and closed the

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door and tried to pretend that I didn't see anything

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because I know, And this is where I need your help, guys.

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This is because I know that if I stayed and

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maintained eye contact for more than three seconds, I was

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going to be tasked with doing something similar, and I

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wanted know part of that detailed cleaning process. So have you, guys,

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ever walked in on your significant other cleaning something so

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weird you walked away and hoped that she'd forget the

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whole thing and would forget having seen you at all. Uh,

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Because let me be clear, I appreciate the effort wholeheartedly.

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I mean, when you absolutely positively want your kitchen cleaned,

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then my wife apparently knows how to do it and

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was busting out the long nozzle vacuum and sucking up

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the knobs, which sounds bad as I say it out loud.

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I never witnessed anything that was you know, maybe turn

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around and walk away. I mean, I lived with someone

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who was quite anal about cleaning. I mean one of

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the things like she would disassemble the vacuum cleaner weekly

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to clean it.

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Wow, that's actually a very good idea. It's probably healthy. Yeah,

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with someone that OCD, though, Trey, Uh, if she was

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that OCD, does that mean she didn't want your help

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because you wouldn't do it properly? Yes, you lucky bastard.

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There was nothing I would if I vacuumed, I didn't

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do it slow enough or whatever. Yeah. No, she also

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ironed underwear too. Wow.

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That that's a that's a level that I don't understand.

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Yeah.

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I didn't either, but but that's that was your moment.

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For me, it was walking out, walking into the kitchen

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seeing my wife vacuuming the stovetop range, and I thought,

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I don't want any part of this. I'm going to disappear.

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It was probably the same for you when you walked

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into the room and saw your ex ironing underwear. You

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were like, oh, I'm out.

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Yeah, I I well, it was one of those moments

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where you normally you're like, what are you doing? And

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I didn't. I did not ask because I did not

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want an explanation because it was I was like, yeah,

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whatever floats your boat.

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Sweetie, it's like walking up It's like it's like being

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on a hike in the woods and stumbling upon a bear.

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It's best to just slowly back away and and just

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hope it doesn't follow you.

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For me, it's when a storage cavity would place whatever

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in the apartment is being rearranged.

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Oh yeah, I think that. I think that's happening today

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at at my house because we have like the storage

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room slash laundry room, and I and I remember putting

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something in there this morning and my wife gleefully saying,

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this is gonna look completely different when you see it next.

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Yes, chills down my spine. I'd be glad I was

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going to work. And it's like we have essentially the

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same stuff. You know, maybe there's one or two things

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that are new, But how come this organization is better

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than the last one, which was also better than the one.

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I mean, it does not just three learning cabinets.

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That's exactly what it is. It's not going to make

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sense to you. As long as it makes sense to her,

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and as long as she gives you a reorientation quarterly,

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then things are going to be okay. For the most part,

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unless you're me, and which case you forget the reorientation

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and you're still looking for a fork from across where

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it used to be and you're just lost inside your

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own home.

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But you probably remember the lines from Police Academy five.

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When they went to Miami High Tower fought a gator

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co starred Wayne Gretzky's wife.

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It's a miracle you're still married.

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That is really, really true.

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You there. Visit us online that Treehouse on Air dot com.

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It really is. That's when they went to the police

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conferences in Miami.

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You're in the treehouse.

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Visit us online at Treehouseonair dot com.

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Be sure to check out all things Treehouse at Treehouse

233
00:16:30.879 --> 00:16:33.200
on air dot com, and give us a follow on

234
00:16:33.240 --> 00:16:36.679
social media. Across all social media platforms, you can find

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the Treehouse at Treehouse on Air. That's at Treehouse on Air.

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And I'm thinking about starting up a new game and

237
00:16:44.000 --> 00:16:46.759
that's called and Trey had this idea. It's very good,

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very solid. I like the idea, very interactive for you.

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The listener.

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Where in the world is Raj Sharma. We believe he's

241
00:16:54.679 --> 00:17:02.279
somewhere in Texas. We're not saying he's missing, but he's

242
00:17:02.320 --> 00:17:06.440
not here inside the treehouse. So consider this a brown

243
00:17:06.480 --> 00:17:12.640
alert from inside the treehouse requesting to find Raj Sharma,

244
00:17:12.720 --> 00:17:15.599
who's about six to one, one hundred and ninety pounds,

245
00:17:15.880 --> 00:17:22.079
forty nine years old, usually surrounded by laughter and jamison.

246
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So if you if you see a man who matches

247
00:17:24.960 --> 00:17:29.160
that description roaming around Texas, probably somewhere in the I

248
00:17:29.160 --> 00:17:35.279
thirty five corridor, and he doesn't look like he's being

249
00:17:35.359 --> 00:17:38.119
held up by border patrol, that's probably him. So if

250
00:17:38.119 --> 00:17:40.319
you could just let us know where he is and

251
00:17:40.680 --> 00:17:44.119
give him a snack too, because he's probably gonna be hungry.

252
00:17:43.640 --> 00:17:47.200
And if he's on an airplane, it's okay, yeah, it is.

253
00:17:47.240 --> 00:17:49.559
He's not gonna do anything wrong, it's it's fine. He

254
00:17:49.599 --> 00:17:51.119
wants to get he wants to get where he's going

255
00:17:51.200 --> 00:17:56.799
as well. So where in the world is Rosh Sharma.

256
00:17:56.920 --> 00:18:00.480
New from inside the tree it's a brown alert, which

257
00:18:00.480 --> 00:18:03.319
if he was here, he would laugh at other stuff

258
00:18:03.359 --> 00:18:07.799
going on inside the treehouse today, very important things such

259
00:18:07.839 --> 00:18:12.240
as Trey. You mentioned Steve Guttenberg and police Academy because

260
00:18:12.279 --> 00:18:16.119
you mentioned Police Academy five. And when you mentioned Police

261
00:18:16.119 --> 00:18:18.720
Academy five, were you surprised that I knew that that's

262
00:18:18.759 --> 00:18:20.079
the one where they went to Miami.

263
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I was, I was really searching for just a really

264
00:18:25.559 --> 00:18:29.839
eighties esoteric reference, And yeah, I have to even had

265
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I said three, I knew you'd knew the plot, but five,

266
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I thought maybe you'd not. You'd they had died off

267
00:18:35.039 --> 00:18:35.359
by then.

268
00:18:35.400 --> 00:18:38.759
But clearly it's funny that you mentioned five because five

269
00:18:38.880 --> 00:18:41.400
is one of those that when you're talking about the

270
00:18:41.480 --> 00:18:44.920
fifth Belise Academy movie, and it doesn't even have Steve

271
00:18:44.920 --> 00:18:48.400
Gutenberg in it. And that's the one that I've probably

272
00:18:48.480 --> 00:18:52.200
seen the second most of all the Police Academy movies.

273
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I don't know why. It just is that it says

274
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a lot about my not necessarily taste, but just things

275
00:19:03.680 --> 00:19:05.680
that I've seen because it's not it's not a great movie.

276
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It's not a good movie.

277
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It's bad.

278
00:19:06.920 --> 00:19:13.039
It's terrible. But you're right, it's it's Police Academy five Assignment,

279
00:19:13.119 --> 00:19:16.759
Miami Beach. And they got a knockoff Gutenberg in there,

280
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but all the other cast was in there. Michael Winslow,

281
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High Tower, like I said, fights a gator. They go

282
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to the police conference in Miami, and yeah, it's police

283
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Academy five.

284
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Yeah, because the rest of the cast that they really

285
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they kind of peaked with police academies and Gutenberg at

286
00:19:33.559 --> 00:19:35.559
least had some other better roles.

287
00:19:36.160 --> 00:19:40.119
Mm hmmm. Yes, he was in Lava Lancelo. That was

288
00:19:40.160 --> 00:19:52.200
the the sci fi film from a handful of years ago. Wow. Yeah,

289
00:19:52.240 --> 00:19:58.759
I love it in here. My weirdness is rewarded. H

290
00:20:00.920 --> 00:20:03.319
And this is technically work for us, so it really

291
00:20:03.440 --> 00:20:06.759
really works out for my benefit and hopefully for yours

292
00:20:06.799 --> 00:20:09.359
as well. But speaking of things that you do at work,

293
00:20:09.400 --> 00:20:10.920
there are some things that people say you are not

294
00:20:10.960 --> 00:20:14.079
supposed to do at work, and they're very, very very

295
00:20:14.119 --> 00:20:17.759
taboo things. A Harris poll asked one thousand Americans to

296
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name the top workplace taboos. So these are things you

297
00:20:21.720 --> 00:20:25.839
should never do at work? All right, you're ready for

298
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the top five? Yes, all right. Gossiping about a colleague,

299
00:20:32.200 --> 00:20:35.480
you are definitely not supposed to do that. But I

300
00:20:35.519 --> 00:20:39.000
have to ask, have you guys gossiped about a colleague?

301
00:20:41.599 --> 00:20:41.759
Yeah?

302
00:20:42.400 --> 00:20:44.559
First, yeah, absolutely answer that. Yeah, of course we have.

303
00:20:44.680 --> 00:20:47.759
We've all done that. We work in radio. Well, I

304
00:20:47.759 --> 00:20:51.400
think I did that this morning. I did it about

305
00:20:51.400 --> 00:20:56.279
a minute and a half ago, saying where's Raj so three

306
00:20:56.319 --> 00:20:59.400
things for us. We've all gossiped at work. We're guilty

307
00:20:59.440 --> 00:21:02.920
of that. Number four of the workplace taboos. These are

308
00:21:02.920 --> 00:21:05.079
things you're not supposed to do at work, dating a

309
00:21:05.119 --> 00:21:09.839
manager or anybody above you. I have not done that, Trey.

310
00:21:12.599 --> 00:21:16.240
I have dated someone above me, yes, and a boy

311
00:21:16.359 --> 00:21:23.240
who uh no, h is it?

312
00:21:23.400 --> 00:21:23.519
Is it?

313
00:21:23.640 --> 00:21:24.319
Somebody I know?

314
00:21:25.559 --> 00:21:25.880
Maybe?

315
00:21:27.200 --> 00:21:31.839
Uh? But uh? But I have never. I have never

316
00:21:31.920 --> 00:21:33.720
dated anyone below me.

317
00:21:34.400 --> 00:21:38.640
So you snob, well.

318
00:21:39.200 --> 00:21:42.279
You know in corporate, but you know, especially in the

319
00:21:42.759 --> 00:21:46.119
restaurant bar business, that happens a lot, and it doesn't

320
00:21:46.119 --> 00:21:46.759
play out well.

321
00:21:46.960 --> 00:21:50.799
And I've never seen it play out well in any industry.

322
00:21:50.839 --> 00:21:54.319
That's why I've told people throughout my career, even when

323
00:21:54.359 --> 00:21:56.240
I was young, I knew not to do that, and

324
00:21:56.279 --> 00:21:59.599
I didn't, and I'm proud to say that I haven't.

325
00:22:00.079 --> 00:22:02.359
So not only no one below, no one above, no

326
00:22:02.440 --> 00:22:08.759
one to the side. I have laterally you have laterally, yeah,

327
00:22:09.079 --> 00:22:09.839
anybody I know.

328
00:22:10.519 --> 00:22:12.559
No, it's no fun.

329
00:22:12.920 --> 00:22:19.599
Let's go back to you Tree. What I almost asked,

330
00:22:19.640 --> 00:22:20.759
who do you date? But then I have to go

331
00:22:20.799 --> 00:22:22.680
back to when we were at one O five three

332
00:22:22.759 --> 00:22:25.319
days and all the saleswomen, so I can imagine there's

333
00:22:25.319 --> 00:22:30.640
probably four or five in there, but that's it, I am.

334
00:22:31.039 --> 00:22:33.839
That would be lateral, that wouldn't be above you. Cour

335
00:22:34.039 --> 00:22:36.079
tell me. Tell me about the candlelight dinner with you

336
00:22:36.119 --> 00:22:42.200
and Pittman. Did he did he fly you in on

337
00:22:42.200 --> 00:22:45.839
his jet? Did he let you sit in his lap

338
00:22:45.880 --> 00:22:49.759
while he flew? Did he ask you if you like

339
00:22:49.799 --> 00:22:55.240
Gladiator movies?

340
00:23:03.319 --> 00:23:06.759
You're listening to the tree House. Visit us online that

341
00:23:06.920 --> 00:23:26.160
Treehouse on Air dot com. You're listening to the Treehouse.

342
00:23:26.799 --> 00:23:30.880
Visit us online that Treehouse on Air dot com.

343
00:23:30.920 --> 00:23:34.200
You can get even more Treehouse when you subscribe to

344
00:23:34.240 --> 00:23:38.960
the Treehouse on Patreon, Patreon dot com slash Treehouse on Air.

345
00:23:39.519 --> 00:23:44.119
Three levels of Treehouse Plus to choose from Treehouse Plus,

346
00:23:44.160 --> 00:23:48.119
Treehouse Super Plus, and Ultimate Treehouse. That is where you

347
00:23:48.240 --> 00:23:51.799
get what Trade likes to call all the Stupid inside

348
00:23:51.920 --> 00:23:55.960
the Treehouse. That's full video episodes along with uncensored mini

349
00:23:56.000 --> 00:24:01.559
episodes all there inside our Patreon Patreon slash tree House

350
00:24:01.799 --> 00:24:06.480
on Air. Thank you very much. We are back inside

351
00:24:06.599 --> 00:24:09.039
the tree House now. I'm Dan, along with Trey and

352
00:24:09.279 --> 00:24:15.039
Jerry called well, we actually didn't finish the things you're

353
00:24:15.039 --> 00:24:18.400
not supposed to do at work. According to one thousand people.

354
00:24:19.559 --> 00:24:22.119
We were all guilty of gossiping about a colleague. We've

355
00:24:22.119 --> 00:24:24.440
all done that. Number four was dating a manager or

356
00:24:24.440 --> 00:24:27.039
someone above you. Tray says he's done that. Jerry says

357
00:24:27.039 --> 00:24:30.599
he's only done Latterally, I've done none of that because

358
00:24:31.160 --> 00:24:36.000
workplace romance is a really bad idea, and that's where

359
00:24:36.400 --> 00:24:37.880
that's where we ran out of steam. We're not ran

360
00:24:37.880 --> 00:24:39.599
out of steam. It's actually where we found out. That's

361
00:24:39.640 --> 00:24:43.119
when Trey and I heard CEO Bob Pittman had their.

362
00:24:45.200 --> 00:24:46.279
Rendezvous.

363
00:24:47.480 --> 00:24:49.160
I'm just glad to see that he's using that plane

364
00:24:49.160 --> 00:24:52.000
for something more than just iHeart festivals. But there are

365
00:24:52.039 --> 00:24:54.400
three more things that we have not touched on yet,

366
00:24:55.640 --> 00:24:57.279
as far as the things you're not supposed to do

367
00:24:57.400 --> 00:25:01.920
at work, and those are making any amount of alcohol.

368
00:25:03.680 --> 00:25:08.079
All three of us have absolutely done that without a doubt.

369
00:25:09.480 --> 00:25:13.240
People say you're not supposed to, but all three of

370
00:25:13.319 --> 00:25:15.440
us have definitely done that. I'm not saying we've done

371
00:25:15.480 --> 00:25:18.039
it today. I'm just saying that we've done it. Kind

372
00:25:18.039 --> 00:25:21.359
of a requirement, We've done a lot of it. Jerry's right,

373
00:25:21.440 --> 00:25:23.119
it's kind of a requirement in our line of work

374
00:25:24.400 --> 00:25:26.200
unless you're trade in which case, you've drink so much

375
00:25:26.240 --> 00:25:29.319
at work that you're full and you've stopped. Yes, which

376
00:25:29.359 --> 00:25:32.960
is a hell of a feat. Number two, using drugs

377
00:25:33.000 --> 00:25:45.559
at work? Wait have I? Oh, I did salvia a

378
00:25:45.599 --> 00:25:48.960
couple of times, So does that count as a drug?

379
00:25:49.319 --> 00:25:55.279
As a plant? Well, I think what's that tray?

380
00:25:55.759 --> 00:25:56.960
So is weed? So yeah?

381
00:25:57.160 --> 00:26:00.960
Yeah, all right, yeah I did drugs at work. Then again,

382
00:26:01.000 --> 00:26:02.799
if you work in radio, you probably have.

383
00:26:05.920 --> 00:26:06.160
Trey.

384
00:26:06.200 --> 00:26:07.680
You're not really a big drug guy, so I don't

385
00:26:07.680 --> 00:26:10.640
know if you've done that, we're chripching drugs. Yeah, but

386
00:26:11.480 --> 00:26:12.319
what about you, Jerry?

387
00:26:13.880 --> 00:26:16.559
You know, I avoided it because I was like, this

388
00:26:16.640 --> 00:26:20.279
is not a good idea. But I did at one

389
00:26:20.359 --> 00:26:23.839
point on a lunch break because I lived close to

390
00:26:23.839 --> 00:26:29.759
where I worked, went home and had lunch and smoked

391
00:26:29.759 --> 00:26:32.079
a bowl before I went back to work, and I

392
00:26:32.119 --> 00:26:34.440
was like, this is fine. I'm just gonna be alphabetizing

393
00:26:34.519 --> 00:26:36.400
things for the next four hours.

394
00:26:36.480 --> 00:26:37.119
It'll be fine.

395
00:26:37.440 --> 00:26:39.119
And I went and I got a bunch of stuff

396
00:26:39.440 --> 00:26:41.119
and I came out and I did it, and I'm like,

397
00:26:41.200 --> 00:26:43.200
all right, you know, I've been out here probably forty

398
00:26:43.200 --> 00:26:45.000
five minutes, almost hour. I looked at my watch, it'd

399
00:26:45.039 --> 00:26:46.480
have been like seven and a half minutes. I was like,

400
00:26:46.519 --> 00:26:49.599
oh my god, I'm never doing this again.

401
00:26:49.839 --> 00:26:52.640
No, it was absolute torture. So that's two out of

402
00:26:52.640 --> 00:26:54.920
three of us have done drugs at work and number

403
00:26:54.960 --> 00:26:57.880
one of the things you were absolutely positively not supposed

404
00:26:57.920 --> 00:27:01.279
to do at work. That's getting drug during work hours,

405
00:27:01.759 --> 00:27:04.599
which is apparently worse than just drinking at all at work.

406
00:27:06.039 --> 00:27:08.839
We've all three absolutely gotten drunk at work. I don't

407
00:27:08.839 --> 00:27:10.640
even need to ask you, Trey or Eugerry.

408
00:27:10.680 --> 00:27:11.880
I know the answer.

409
00:27:13.160 --> 00:27:17.240
And again I'm not saying we are now, but we're

410
00:27:17.240 --> 00:27:19.640
also not saying that we're not exactly correct.

411
00:27:25.519 --> 00:27:25.880
All right.

412
00:27:25.960 --> 00:27:27.839
I'm not sure if you guys are prepared to see

413
00:27:27.839 --> 00:27:29.440
when I'm about to show you, but I'm going to

414
00:27:29.480 --> 00:27:40.000
show you anyway. Is this the scariest Christmas parade you

415
00:27:40.119 --> 00:27:59.039
have ever seen? Is this? So if you're just listening

416
00:27:59.319 --> 00:28:01.599
and not watch this show, which you can do on

417
00:28:01.680 --> 00:28:05.240
Patreon dot com, slash Treehouse on air plug for the

418
00:28:05.519 --> 00:28:13.359
subscription channel. It's a snowy mountain village in Austria. And

419
00:28:13.559 --> 00:28:17.200
instead of it being like an AI generated video of

420
00:28:17.240 --> 00:28:22.119
places you need to visit on Instagram, instead it's demonic

421
00:28:22.160 --> 00:28:26.039
looking crampuses walking down the street banging on metal drums,

422
00:28:26.400 --> 00:28:28.720
and a dude who's I guess is sort of like

423
00:28:28.759 --> 00:28:32.400
the band leader of the Crampus March, but instead of

424
00:28:32.440 --> 00:28:36.000
a twirling staff, it's a staff that's large, made of

425
00:28:36.000 --> 00:28:40.759
wood and on fire. And the crampuses that are in

426
00:28:40.920 --> 00:28:47.519
line behind them are an intricate handmade suits made of

427
00:28:47.640 --> 00:28:52.119
various animal firs, horrific looking masks on their faces, and

428
00:28:52.279 --> 00:28:56.160
long horns, all of which, of course symbolize the joy

429
00:28:56.160 --> 00:28:57.000
of Christmas.

430
00:28:57.839 --> 00:29:01.119
I'm going to tell you what it looks like, and

431
00:29:01.359 --> 00:29:05.000
this is gonna, This is gonna. I don't know, Dan,

432
00:29:05.079 --> 00:29:06.880
this movie was somewhat popular, so you may not have

433
00:29:06.920 --> 00:29:13.279
seen it, but uh Ester movies, this looks like something

434
00:29:13.319 --> 00:29:16.839
out of the ending scene of the movie Dragnet with

435
00:29:17.000 --> 00:29:18.359
Dan Akroyd and Tom Hanks.

436
00:29:18.440 --> 00:29:22.799
Oh yes, not only have I seen it, I had

437
00:29:22.799 --> 00:29:26.319
the same and thought you did. Because they got the

438
00:29:26.359 --> 00:29:32.160
furry leggings. The Crampus Marchers have the furry leggings like

439
00:29:32.359 --> 00:29:37.359
Dan Ackroyd and Tom Hanks did in the classic Hades

440
00:29:37.400 --> 00:29:42.119
film Dragnet where they do the dance as well. That's

441
00:29:42.160 --> 00:29:44.640
exactly what these look like. They're like like sheep, except

442
00:29:44.680 --> 00:29:46.480
it's brown instead of white on the leggings. So the

443
00:29:46.519 --> 00:29:48.720
costumes on the Crampas is a brown. The leggings on

444
00:29:48.799 --> 00:29:53.039
dragnet were white. You got right, I've seen that movie.

445
00:29:53.519 --> 00:29:56.720
Jerry's right, he said it during a break. Whoever's listening

446
00:29:56.799 --> 00:29:58.400
to this, You know, the younger ones, they are gonna

447
00:29:58.400 --> 00:30:00.240
have a whole list of things they need to go.

448
00:30:01.799 --> 00:30:04.000
And you know what, they should be thankful because we're

449
00:30:04.039 --> 00:30:09.680
giving them a treasure trove of fun. Absolutely. So let's

450
00:30:09.720 --> 00:30:13.240
go back then to the Crampus Parade twenty twenty four

451
00:30:13.960 --> 00:30:17.079
in Austria. And this is apparently a thing every single

452
00:30:17.160 --> 00:30:20.039
year they do. Actually I guess this would be last

453
00:30:20.119 --> 00:30:22.279
year because they haven't done the one this year yet

454
00:30:22.319 --> 00:30:26.880
I don't believe. Because the Crampis Parade in Austria happens

455
00:30:26.880 --> 00:30:33.839
on either, according to my research, December fifth or sixth. Okay,

456
00:30:36.559 --> 00:30:41.880
it is called Crampis lof or Crampus Parade often takes

457
00:30:41.880 --> 00:30:45.119
place on either Saint Nicholas Eve, which is December fifth,

458
00:30:45.240 --> 00:30:50.279
or Saint Nicholas Day, which is December sixth, And that's

459
00:30:50.319 --> 00:30:53.279
apparently what this is. This is the Crampis Parade that

460
00:30:54.079 --> 00:30:57.839
happens every year in Austria. So all these guys are

461
00:30:57.839 --> 00:31:00.759
addressing these elaborate crampus looking costs whoms. They just look

462
00:31:00.839 --> 00:31:05.240
like furry monsters with demon faces, huge antlers, one guy

463
00:31:05.519 --> 00:31:08.799
holding a big torch and the other guys playing metal

464
00:31:08.880 --> 00:31:13.680
drums as they walk down the street in an alp village.

465
00:31:15.400 --> 00:31:16.039
What's that tray?

466
00:31:16.400 --> 00:31:20.599
They look like if an elk banged an e walk.

467
00:31:22.079 --> 00:31:40.519
It's very accurate, and and played metal drums. Here they

468
00:31:40.519 --> 00:32:00.240
are walking on the street banging on a drum. Is it?

469
00:32:00.279 --> 00:32:02.319
Is it just me? Or does it look like they

470
00:32:02.400 --> 00:32:05.119
just got the return to office memo from the CEO?

471
00:32:07.079 --> 00:32:07.279
Right?

472
00:32:07.880 --> 00:32:09.759
And this is them on the commute on the way

473
00:32:09.759 --> 00:32:13.799
back in. All right, I'm gonna come in, but I'm

474
00:32:13.799 --> 00:32:15.160
not gonna be happy about I'm gonna put on my

475
00:32:15.200 --> 00:32:18.880
crampas outfit and bang on my metal drum. Those drums

476
00:32:18.920 --> 00:32:23.599
look like that. They look like cook tops.

477
00:32:23.759 --> 00:32:27.640
That's It's like they went to make actual like steel

478
00:32:27.720 --> 00:32:30.799
drums and then just didn't.

479
00:32:32.079 --> 00:32:35.160
I have some experience with the Caribbean steel pan drums

480
00:32:35.200 --> 00:32:36.680
and they don't sound anything.

481
00:32:36.519 --> 00:32:40.000
Like this, No, not at all, And the guys playing

482
00:32:40.039 --> 00:32:41.640
it look nothing like this either.

483
00:32:42.279 --> 00:32:45.039
Right, Well, the guys playing these they do they they

484
00:32:45.599 --> 00:32:48.160
they're so big. They look like they just couldn't leave

485
00:32:48.160 --> 00:32:50.039
the cook top because they couldn't go with the out

486
00:32:50.200 --> 00:32:52.680
without eating that long and just strapped them to their chest.

487
00:32:55.000 --> 00:32:57.400
But literally they look like they're they're they're five by

488
00:32:57.440 --> 00:32:58.440
five mm.

489
00:33:01.079 --> 00:33:09.640
It's like the opening act for Gore. I'll say, Jerry,

490
00:33:10.279 --> 00:33:16.519
I'd buy tickets to that show or VIP tickets Psilocybin.

491
00:33:17.400 --> 00:33:22.119
You're listening to the Treehouse, Visit us online at treehouseonair

492
00:33:22.279 --> 00:33:23.039
dot com.

493
00:33:23.400 --> 00:33:25.200
That's one mush bit I think twice about.

494
00:33:25.200 --> 00:33:37.720
Though you're in the Treehouse.

495
00:33:38.559 --> 00:33:45.039
Visit us online at Treehouse air dot com.

496
00:33:45.200 --> 00:33:48.400
Be sure to follow us on social media the handles

497
00:33:48.440 --> 00:33:52.359
across all social media platforms at Treehouse on Air. That's

498
00:33:52.400 --> 00:33:55.880
at Treehouse on Air. Give us a follow on social media.

499
00:33:55.960 --> 00:33:58.400
I think you'll be glad you did. Back inside the

500
00:33:58.400 --> 00:34:00.640
Treehouse now, I'm Daniel Malley along with you trend home

501
00:34:00.720 --> 00:34:04.839
and Jerry called well, and I'm a little fascinated by

502
00:34:04.880 --> 00:34:10.800
the Crampus, not just the creature itself and its origins,

503
00:34:11.599 --> 00:34:14.199
but the video that we just watched of the Crampis

504
00:34:14.280 --> 00:34:18.920
parade from from years ago or last year whatever, it

505
00:34:19.000 --> 00:34:21.079
was because the next Crampis parade is supposed to happen

506
00:34:21.079 --> 00:34:25.079
in a day or two in Austria. Apparently, the people

507
00:34:25.119 --> 00:34:28.360
that take part in these parades, these costumes are very intricate,

508
00:34:28.679 --> 00:34:33.199
and apparently they're handmade. So this isn't like there's not

509
00:34:33.280 --> 00:34:37.360
like a Crampus store that creeps in somewhere in September

510
00:34:37.400 --> 00:34:38.920
and then they just go there and buy one for

511
00:34:39.000 --> 00:34:41.639
eighty bucks. They're making these things by hand, and they're

512
00:34:41.679 --> 00:34:44.599
really elaborate, and they're terrifying looking. I mean, I can't

513
00:34:44.599 --> 00:34:48.800
imagine children being at this parade. But and I know

514
00:34:48.880 --> 00:34:53.199
there was a movie called Crampis that came out years ago.

515
00:34:53.920 --> 00:34:56.400
I will admit I have not seen it, but I

516
00:34:56.440 --> 00:34:58.400
also have to say it's been on my list and

517
00:34:58.599 --> 00:35:03.000
for some reason, I just haven't come around to seeing

518
00:35:03.039 --> 00:35:05.239
it yet. I don't know why I want to. I'm

519
00:35:05.280 --> 00:35:09.199
curious about it. I did see was It Violent Night?

520
00:35:10.440 --> 00:35:12.840
A couple? Was that last Christmas or the Christmas before?

521
00:35:13.199 --> 00:35:13.280
That?

522
00:35:13.400 --> 00:35:16.639
Was excellent film. That was the one with Chief Hopper

523
00:35:16.679 --> 00:35:25.480
from Stranger Things plays a Valhalla Santa Claus. Excellent, excellent

524
00:35:25.480 --> 00:35:28.519
movie that I've seen. But the Crampist movie I've not.

525
00:35:28.719 --> 00:35:32.559
Do you guys know anything about the Crampus just a

526
00:35:32.559 --> 00:35:33.039
little bit.

527
00:35:33.920 --> 00:35:36.760
I've got some very close friends that are German and

528
00:35:36.840 --> 00:35:39.679
they've told me a little bit about it well.

529
00:35:39.679 --> 00:35:44.840
According to Wikipedia, the Crampis German is a horned anthropomorphic

530
00:35:45.079 --> 00:35:49.400
figure who, in Central and Eastern Alpine folkloric tradition man

531
00:35:49.400 --> 00:35:51.360
There's a lot of hard words to say, is said

532
00:35:51.360 --> 00:35:54.320
to accompany Saint Nicholas on visits to children during the

533
00:35:54.440 --> 00:36:00.679
night of December fifth, Crampus Knocked or Crampus Knight, immediately

534
00:36:00.679 --> 00:36:03.519
before the feast of Saint Nicholas on December sixth. In

535
00:36:03.519 --> 00:36:07.159
this tradition, Saint Nicholas rewards well behaved children with gifts,

536
00:36:07.559 --> 00:36:14.559
while Crampus punishes badly behaved ones with birch rods. Although

537
00:36:14.559 --> 00:36:18.840
bitch rods would be really funny as well, leave it

538
00:36:18.880 --> 00:36:24.360
to the Germans to make Santa scary absolutely. The origin

539
00:36:24.440 --> 00:36:28.440
of the figure is unclear. Some folklorus and anthropologists have

540
00:36:28.559 --> 00:36:31.719
postulated that it may have pre Christian origins. Yeah, it

541
00:36:31.760 --> 00:36:35.119
probably does. In traditional parades and in such events as

542
00:36:35.480 --> 00:36:39.239
the Crampus Run, young men dressed as Crampus attempt to

543
00:36:39.239 --> 00:36:41.960
scare the audience with their antics and Crampus is featured

544
00:36:42.199 --> 00:36:46.599
on holiday greeting cards called Crampus Carton. I just like

545
00:36:46.679 --> 00:36:48.719
the idea of a Crampus run where instead of it's

546
00:36:48.760 --> 00:36:51.079
a running of the bulls and it's people running from

547
00:36:51.119 --> 00:36:53.559
the bulls, I like to think it's children running from

548
00:36:53.559 --> 00:37:06.079
these crampuses with their bitch rods. You better run what

549
00:37:07.960 --> 00:37:09.199
Crampus is going to get you.

550
00:37:10.920 --> 00:37:15.039
Somehow. I just I just feel like that the crampus

551
00:37:15.039 --> 00:37:17.239
prey turns into an all day drinking affair, and then

552
00:37:17.280 --> 00:37:20.519
at night there's a Crampus that's an outfit, looks more like,

553
00:37:20.519 --> 00:37:22.079
you know, like assless chaps.

554
00:37:25.760 --> 00:37:26.000
Yead.

555
00:37:26.039 --> 00:37:28.360
And right before that in Germany he said, watch this.

556
00:37:28.639 --> 00:37:36.320
Yeah, look up to my rod, my mighty mighty bitch rod.

557
00:37:40.599 --> 00:37:42.119
All right, I'm really into the Crampus thing.

558
00:37:42.119 --> 00:37:42.239
Now.

559
00:37:42.280 --> 00:37:44.400
I like how they show up. It's like the good See.

560
00:37:44.599 --> 00:37:47.199
That's one of the things that that didn't make the

561
00:37:47.320 --> 00:37:51.719
leap across the Atlantic. Santa did the Saint Nicholas thing

562
00:37:52.320 --> 00:37:54.400
rewarding well behaved children with gifts.

563
00:37:55.480 --> 00:37:56.159
We didn't get.

564
00:37:56.119 --> 00:38:02.639
Crampus in America. No, just Cole, I think you got

565
00:38:02.719 --> 00:38:04.679
to bring the I think I like the crampis angle

566
00:38:04.760 --> 00:38:08.360
on it. You could really you could really change some

567
00:38:08.480 --> 00:38:13.239
lives of some children. Look, I mean we have heaven

568
00:38:13.280 --> 00:38:16.960
and Hell. Right, we have heaven and Hell. You've got

569
00:38:17.000 --> 00:38:19.800
you've got Jesus and Lucifer. You know, you've got God,

570
00:38:19.840 --> 00:38:23.199
and you've got Satan. You know, in America we have

571
00:38:23.280 --> 00:38:25.639
Santa Claus, but we don't have Crampis, and we I

572
00:38:25.679 --> 00:38:33.480
think there's a room for him. Absolutely. I just can't

573
00:38:33.519 --> 00:38:34.639
wait to see the parade go.

574
00:38:36.760 --> 00:38:39.159
Yeah, I want to see this, see the inflatable that

575
00:38:39.239 --> 00:38:44.960
goes with Macy's, especially if it's assless.

576
00:38:44.639 --> 00:38:52.760
Chats The New York City Crampis Parade, brought to you

577
00:38:52.760 --> 00:38:53.639
by Jaegermeister.

578
00:38:58.360 --> 00:39:04.000
You're in the visit us online.

579
00:39:04.039 --> 00:39:19.559
I'm Treehouse on air dot com.

580
00:39:19.599 --> 00:39:23.119
If you're in the tree house, visit us online.

581
00:39:23.119 --> 00:39:27.000
I'm freehouse on air dot com.

582
00:39:27.119 --> 00:39:30.360
You can visit us online our website Treehouse on air

583
00:39:30.440 --> 00:39:33.360
dot com. That's Treehouse on air dot com. While you're there,

584
00:39:33.400 --> 00:39:36.039
the lower right hand corner has a little microphone you

585
00:39:36.039 --> 00:39:37.920
can click on that leave us voicemail, send us a

586
00:39:37.960 --> 00:39:40.960
message inside the treehouse. You can talk back to us

587
00:39:41.400 --> 00:39:44.960
right here inside the Treehouse at Treehouse on air dot com.

588
00:39:45.000 --> 00:39:47.679
The little microphone or the lower right hand corner allows

589
00:39:47.800 --> 00:39:50.719
you to do that. Back inside the treehouse now, I'm

590
00:39:50.760 --> 00:39:54.280
Daniel Malling, along with Trey Trendholme and Jerry called well,

591
00:39:54.320 --> 00:39:56.000
now that we know a little more about Crampus and

592
00:39:56.039 --> 00:39:59.320
how awesome of a figure he is or she, I'm

593
00:39:59.360 --> 00:40:02.320
not sure if it's their female. I didn't look between

594
00:40:02.320 --> 00:40:05.000
the free leggings on that video, and I'm not going

595
00:40:05.079 --> 00:40:10.239
to go to Austria and ask. There is something though

596
00:40:10.280 --> 00:40:14.159
that does loosely tie into Crampis I think, I think

597
00:40:15.119 --> 00:40:22.519
and that is not another teen tanter? Do you guys

598
00:40:22.559 --> 00:40:26.719
know what it sounds like when a teenager gets their

599
00:40:26.800 --> 00:40:29.159
cell phone plan canceled at an AT and T store.

600
00:40:30.079 --> 00:40:37.199
M oh my, yeah, you're about to find out a

601
00:40:37.480 --> 00:40:47.480
raise play that for you again. This is this is

602
00:40:47.519 --> 00:40:49.400
just the portion I can play because the rest of

603
00:40:49.440 --> 00:40:59.400
it is eglative field mamrase. I mean this this girl

604
00:40:59.480 --> 00:41:04.199
is like thirteen, maybe maybe fourteen. Mama's in there at

605
00:41:04.199 --> 00:41:07.360
the AT and T store canceling the plan, canceling the phone,

606
00:41:07.800 --> 00:41:11.639
and this kid is losing her God mind.

607
00:41:12.000 --> 00:41:16.519
I mean, I would imagine if you were you know,

608
00:41:16.599 --> 00:41:18.760
I'm sure there's a recording somewhere if someone getting sentenced

609
00:41:18.760 --> 00:41:21.480
to the death penalty that would sound similar to this.

610
00:41:22.400 --> 00:41:25.239
I've also seen people get sentenced to the death penalty

611
00:41:25.239 --> 00:41:36.519
who took it better than this. Right exactly right in there,

612
00:41:36.519 --> 00:41:38.639
you can kind of hear Mama say shut your ass up.

613
00:41:38.679 --> 00:41:41.280
And then after that at this little clip, right after

614
00:41:41.320 --> 00:41:43.400
the part that ends, I can't air the rest of

615
00:41:43.440 --> 00:41:45.639
it because that's when Mama tells her to shut it up.

616
00:41:47.159 --> 00:41:57.719
Sounds so yes, Jerry starts out sounding like a demonic

617
00:41:57.719 --> 00:41:59.880
possession and then moves into like a jaguar roar.

618
00:42:04.159 --> 00:42:16.280
Let's endalyze, mom. Now, so this is her as a teenager.

619
00:42:17.360 --> 00:42:27.920
Imagine her in ten, fifteen, twenty years. I think I

620
00:42:27.920 --> 00:42:33.000
think she just rocketed to the top of the crampis list.

621
00:42:35.400 --> 00:42:38.239
I'd like I'd like to I'd like to see that movie, please.

622
00:42:40.920 --> 00:42:42.599
I'm sure her mother would like to see that movie.

623
00:42:43.719 --> 00:42:45.639
Something tells me if this kid was brought up with

624
00:42:46.119 --> 00:42:49.320
believing in Crampus, she wouldn't be having a teen tantrum

625
00:42:49.360 --> 00:42:50.599
like that in the cell phone store.

626
00:42:52.719 --> 00:42:56.480
If I had ever done something like that, I mean,

627
00:42:57.159 --> 00:43:01.800
you would hear of the screams of anger then followed

628
00:43:01.800 --> 00:43:03.440
by just the wails of pain.

629
00:43:05.400 --> 00:43:07.880
If you ever did anything that sounded like this, Tray,

630
00:43:08.039 --> 00:43:10.880
it would be the last sound your body ever produced.

631
00:43:11.000 --> 00:43:13.679
Uh huh, because your dad would have snuffed it out.

632
00:43:14.400 --> 00:43:19.400
M Maybe that's what it was. We didn't need crampis.

633
00:43:19.440 --> 00:43:25.360
We just had belts, yes, And in Tray's case, it

634
00:43:25.400 --> 00:43:27.760
was just actually named belt. It was a belt with

635
00:43:27.800 --> 00:43:31.880
the name belt on it that his dad used. God,

636
00:43:31.920 --> 00:43:34.679
just imagine if imagine if one of our parents brought

637
00:43:34.679 --> 00:43:39.320
out a belt that said crampus on it. You wear

638
00:43:39.360 --> 00:43:43.000
the mask antlers and start doing the will stop there?

639
00:43:43.039 --> 00:43:44.519
All right? Thanks to hanging out with us inside the

640
00:43:44.519 --> 00:43:46.519
tree House. Be sure to check out all things Treehouse

641
00:43:46.559 --> 00:43:49.559
at Treehouse on Air, dot com, and on social media

642
00:43:49.639 --> 00:43:52.480
at Treehouse on Air. For me, it's at the Dan O'Malley.

643
00:43:52.519 --> 00:43:55.320
For Tray at Tree Trnentholme one and for Jerry called, well,

644
00:43:55.360 --> 00:43:57.599
it's at that Jerry guy. Don't forget. We've a brown

645
00:43:57.599 --> 00:43:59.599
alert out for Raj Charmas, So if you see him,

646
00:44:00.199 --> 00:44:03.559
let us know. We assume somewhere on the along the

647
00:44:03.559 --> 00:44:06.760
I thirty five quarridor we'll see you tomorrow right here

648
00:44:06.920 --> 00:44:07.960
inside the Treehouse.