May 19, 2026
Monk Seal Defense Goes Horribly Wrong + Dallas Wants to Save Whales? | Funny News Podcast

The Treehouse Show is back with one of the worst defense attorney arguments we’ve ever heard: apparently the guy accused of throwing a rock at a monk seal was “trying to save the turtles.” Sure. Totally normal behavior.
From there, things spiral into classic Treehouse chaos as we break down why Dallas is suddenly trying to save whales, celebrity birthdays that somehow turn into Arnold Schwarzenegger impressions, and a new report claiming high school drinking is at an all-time low.
Plus:
- The monk seal story that keeps getting worse
- Dallas whale conservation confusion
- Grace Jones birthday discussion
- Are teens actually drinking less?
- The terrifying roller coaster story Dan never wanted to hear
About the show:
Leave your worries outside and join Dan O'Malley, Trey Trenholm, and their hilarious guests for laughs about funny news and viral stories with ridiculous commentary inside the Treehouse Show.
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WEBVTT
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Want more Treehouse, check out our YouTube exclusive shows at
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YouTube dot com. Slash at Treehouse on air.
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It is time I believe your worries outside and laugh
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with us inside the Treehouse. I'm Daniel Malley along with
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Trey Trenholm. Coming up on today's show. The Whaling Wall
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has us in tears. The Whaling Wall has some of
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us in tears. I have found a rebound for Trey.
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This may also lead to tears.
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But first inside the Treehouse today and to start us
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off this week, demand that went megaviral just last week
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for throwing rocks in Hawaii at an endangered monk seal.
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Azar Fond.
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Oh boy.
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Yeah.
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The man seeing throwing a rock toward an endangered Hawaiian
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monk seal had a good reason for it, According to
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his defense attorney, who released this statement a few days ago,
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one of the.
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Resoundingly clear with the public. He never intended to enter
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the monk seal.
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Trey correct me if I'm wrong, But if I'm throwing
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a rock at something, my goal is to injure it.
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If you're getting as close as he did to hitting it. Yes,
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and mind you that this monk seal was in a
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cordoned off space because she had just given birth.
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Well, let's let the court of public opinion roll just
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a little bit more. Let's hear out this attorney for
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one of the most hated in on the planet.
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I want to be resoundingly clear with the public. He
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never intended to enter the monk seal.
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In fact, I love as he says that the news
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station shows footage of him throwing the rock at the seal.
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He's been to Hawaii a few times. He was unaware
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that we had seals here. He does have an affection
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for turtles, as does his wife, and as our understanding,
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there were turtles in the area where he was in
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the water he saw the monk seal. I think his
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intent was to scare the seal away from the turtles.
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We were waiting for a video that we can use
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to illustrate what he saw at the time before he
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went and pick up a rock and through it.
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Oh my god.
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See, Trey Igor had a great reason for throwing rocks
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at that endangered monk seal. He was trying to protect
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the turtles that you don't see in the video. And
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the attorney says, we're hoping to find another video that.
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Will support that claim good luck.
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How did he know he wasn't going to hit a turtle.
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That's an excellent point because if you felt the need
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to intervene to save the turtles from that mean, nasty seal,
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then you would think the seal was really close to
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the turtle, which means you're throwing the rock in the vicinity.
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Of the turtle.
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Do seals eat turtles?
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I don't know. I know they eat fish.
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Yeah, I'm going to do a live I'm gonna go
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to Gary on this. Gary is what I've named my
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chat GPT. Do seals eat turtles? Keep in mind, this
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is gonna completely throw off my algorithm with my chat GPT.
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He's gonna think I've lost it. I'm drunk or on
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drugs or somebody else.
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You start a new session for those those questions.
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Oh yeah, this is this is a completely new branch.
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Do seals eat turtles? Yes, some seals do eat turtles,
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but it's not very common. Seals are carnivorous and have
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a pretty flexible diet depending on the species and where
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they live. Most of the time, they prefer easier, more
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abundant prey like fish, squid, crustaceans. However, larger or more
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opportunistic species like the leopard seal are known to eat
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a wide range of animals.
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Yeah, I just don't see I mean, if a seal
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is really hungry, then I see them, you know, trying
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to mess with a turtle. But it's like most most
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things don't eat the turtles because they're kind of a
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pain in the ast eat.
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Yeah, they have that big protective shell.
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They are a real pain.
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I have seen one video of a shark eating a turtle,
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and it was because I believe the turtle was already
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dead and or injured by run into a boat propeller,
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so it was basically easy pickens for the shark. Yeah,
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it's that that's not an ideal meal for any creature
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on this planet.
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Turtle.
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I'm sorry for the pun, but I have to say
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it because I can't think of a better way. In
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the moment, this attorney is saying that I Gore had
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a good reason to throw the rocks at the seal,
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and that was to protect the turtles.
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Does that argument hold water?
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Yeah, I don't think so. I think.
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A if you are going to say that you knew
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there were turtles in the water but not seals and
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b well.
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He was saying that he didn't know Hawaii had seals
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in general. When he saw the seal in front of him,
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then he knew that they were there. Even though he's
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been to Hawaii like three times, he's claiming he didn't
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know that Hawaii had seals.
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I believe most Pacific Coast Pacific Ocean places have seals.
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I have not studied it immensely, but if memory serves
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that that's.
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They're fairly common in the Pacific.
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Is where they go.
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This guy has been to Hawaii a few times, according
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to his attorney, and didn't know there were seals. I
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I know comparison is not always fair, but I'm going
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to do it in this case because it illustrates my point.
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I have never been to Hawaii, and I know Hawaii
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has seals. I don't know how you can go to
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Hawaii and not know that they got seals. So I
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don't buy it, mister attorney.
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Man, this is one of those things where God blessed
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defense attorneys that they have to you know, they get
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paid a lot of money to do this kind of crap.
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But I just feel like, either the guy is so
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egotistical that he's gonna try to beat this because really,
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it seems like the smartest thing to do would just
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be a mia culpa, say I screwed.
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Up, I'm sorry.
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Here, let me stroke a check for you know, fifty
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grand to the Save the Seals, and you probably would
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be a lot better off than this dumbass line of defense.
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Yeah, at least then it has a chance of going away.
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But with this strategy, you just added fuel to the fire.
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Clearly he's beside himself with.
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If the rock don't hit, he must have quit.
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Illustrate what he saw at the time before he went
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and picked up a rock and threw it. Clearly he's
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beside himself with regret.
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Okay, that's a horrible thing for an attorney to say.
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Clearly he's beside himself with regret. How was that clear
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to anybody, because the one comment we heard out of
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him was from the initial video of him saying I'm rich,
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I don't care to find me.
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Yeah, he's the sight of himself because he is now
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one of the most hated people on the face of
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the earth.
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When he's he's he is awash with regret because he
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realizes he's not that rich. He thought he had money
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until he until he got himself into depths of trouble
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of which there are no return and and he doesn't
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have the level of money to buy his way out of.
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This well, and.
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He doesn't have one of those names that is just
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gonna fly under the radar, and you people are going
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to see it and go, oh, you know that's oh
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Jack Smith, Sure.
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Yeah, Noor instead.
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According to a criminal complaint, Igor Maclayovich Litvchuk of Coming
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in Washington was filmed on May fifth, twenty twenty six,
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walking along the shoreline in Lahena of Maui while following
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the movements of a Hawaiian monks. Heal name Laney gained
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widespread attention after a witness posted video footage online and
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it went viral. Yeah, I mean Igor, I call him
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Igor or whatever, Nick Kaloivich lit Vinchuk, I gore at mL.
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Mega loser.
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I mean obviously Eastern European heritage of some sorts. But
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I even I think they probably think he's an asshole.
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Yeah, they probably saw his fun and like, see, this
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is why we were glad he left.
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I mean again, this is one of those things thirty
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years ago, if someone had their beta cam out there
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and was recording you.
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Chances are you're set.
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But yeah, you're just an a hole on someone's family videos.
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Yeah, but internet lives forever.
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Internet lives forever, and smartphone video is forever. Look, we're
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not typically known as environmental activists inside the treehouse, but
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we are animal lovers.
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Well, I isn't the term clubbing a baby seal just
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universally known as you're just being an ass?
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Yeah, that is sort of the equation. That's sort of
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the metaphor, that's sort of the standard, that's that's the
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standard equation of how much of an a hole are you?
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Are you someone willing to club a baby seal? And
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this guy seems like he is. But this is not
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the biggest environmental story. Well, okay, it probably is the
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biggest environmental story at least over the last.
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Week or two.
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But locally in our beloved Dallas Fort Worth, there is
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another environmental issue that has been painted over in downtown Dallas.
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A well known downtown Dallas mural created by marine life
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artist Wiland, was painted over as part of a new
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project tied to the twenty twenty six feef of World Cup,
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sparking backlash from the artist and some residents.
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Who say a piece of the city's history is disappearing.
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I thought they just they taped, they covered it up,
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and then they painted over it.
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Yeah, they painted over it, but not.
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Really painted over it.
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It's just, oh, they taped it and painted on the
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tape so they can peel it off later.
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Yes, I don't know.
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The mural, known as Whaling Wall eighty two, has covered
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the side of the former Texas Utilities building facing ackerd
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Street for nearly thirty years. Full disclosure. I remember driving
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into downtown Dallas after that thing was painted and a
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number of times thinking why did we put wales on
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the side of the building. It seems we're we don't
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have them here. I didn't understand it, but I didn't
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know anything about it at the time, and I still
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know very little. But that was the extent of my
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knowledge on the Whaling Wall of Downtown. It was something
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that I saw, I was familiar with it. I didn't
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know why it was there in the first place, but
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I just knew it existed. Last week, Cruise began covering
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portions of the mural with new artwork connected to the
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upcoming World Cup. Dallas resident Ed Smith said I couldn't
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believe it because I've always been a big fan of
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this will wowl. He said, I'm just heartbroken. That's why
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I had to come down here and take a photograph,
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just to make it believable to me. Wyland, who created
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the mural, said he was never contacted before work began.
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He says, we have lots of walls and you're gonna
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paint over mine. The artist said he first learned about
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the changes after someone sent him a photo of the
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work underway. Wyland called the decision really disrespectful on every level.
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And FIFA and the City of Dallas came out or no,
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FIFA came out and said, uh we we talked to
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we talked to the artists, we talked to Dallas about this,
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and you know, everything's fine.
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And the artist is like, uh uh no, they didn't.
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And Fox four caught up with him and he reiterated
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that by saying, no, they didn't.
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They had all these walls. There's so many great walls
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to paint. Uh pick a wall that's not part of
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Dallas's public art, you know history.
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They said that they contacted us. They did not. They
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did not contact me. That's a lie with a capital L.
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They picked the wrong artists. I can tell you that
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I'm going to go after them, and I'm going to
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go out after from hard. I'm going to ask the
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community of Dallas stay with me, because we're gonna protect
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the other works of art in Dallas.
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I mean, my god.
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So it seems like Dallas has its own punisher and
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it comes in the form of a whale skeleton, and
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he's coming for you.
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