Dec. 18, 2024

Trust Me, I'm a Professional | Wednesday 12.18.24

Show Notes
Transcript

We start off revisiting the devout porn star Sophie Rain, we learn about Pope Francis opening holy doors, a professional drinker (really an amateur), best jobs for people who hate people, and how many guys does a girl have to sleep with in one day before the spark dies? But first, Birthdays!

LINKS:

Christian OnlyFans top earner reveals bids to lose her virginity on camera: 'Multiple companies offered'

Pope Francis to open 5 sacred portals on Christmas Eve -- for a ritual that’s never been done before

Man tells police he’s a ‘professional drinker’ following multi-vehicle crash

What are good professions for people that hate people? : r/AskReddit
OnlyFans model Lily Phillips cries after sleeping with 101 men in a day

The Treehouse is a daily DFW based comedy podcast and radio show. Leave your worries outside and join Dan O'Malley, Trey Trenholm, Raj Sharma, and their guests for laughs about current events, stupid news, and the comedy that is their lives. If it's stupid, it's in here.

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It is time believe your worries outside and laugh with

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us inside the Treehouse. I'm Daniel Malley along with Trey

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Trenholm and Raj Sharma on Wednesday, December eighteenth, two thy

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twenty four. We've spent a little bit of time recently

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talking about only Fans model Sophie Rain, who has definitely

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made it rain on her channel to the tune of

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forty three million dollars four point seven million of which

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from one guy. But she ain't done yet because with

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all this new fame comes new offers. Especially the other

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angle that we talked about with Sophie Rain was wondering

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does her only fans content conflict with her devout religious beliefs.

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Something that I posed recently online was can Sophie Rain

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spray and pray? You really got to follow all things?

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Three House?

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Thank you? Yeah, well done?

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Matter check us out on YouTube as well, that's where

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that little nugget is. Uh so again, So, now that

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she's out there as far as forty three million dollars

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and only fans revenue, adult content creator Devout Christian still

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goes to church with the fam.

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Which I'm sure makes it interesting for everyone else.

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But because she's a Christian. She also says she's a

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virgin despite her only fans content. Now again, I've not

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seen any of her only fans content, so I don't

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know what it all entails. I'm certain she's naked, and

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I'm that's really all I know. I don't know if

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she's a solo act. I don't know if she has

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any collaboration things or whatever.

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I don't know.

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But she says she's a virgin, and since no one

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else is saying no, you're not, I'm just going to

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take her word for it. And I'm assumed that there's

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no pinned tritive content or something.

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I don't know.

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Some people's definition of virginity varies.

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Anyway.

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Sophie Rain religious OnlyFans, millionaire content creator, and virgin. Well

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because of that, now the offers are rolling in.

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To take her virginity.

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Multiple companies have offered her seven figures for the v

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card m That's what she has divulged to fellow content

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creator Camille Arajol in a TikTok video with probably ten

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million views or so, she says. Sophie Rain says, multiple

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companies actually offered me seven figures to take my v card,

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The Padoxical, The paradoxical. Pornographer Sophie Rain is not ready

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to cash in her V card on camera, though she

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says no, why would I do that? She boasts nine

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point six million followers on TikTok, and she frequently shares

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sultry dancing videos that prompted her friend to joke that

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she'd volunteer in her stead, telling companies to hire her,

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before cheekily observing that it may not be a ve car,

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but more like a thirteenth. It's unclear which pleasure purveyors

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approached Sophie Rain, but she has received offers to join

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OnlyFans rival fans Leap, which I have not heard of

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until this exact moment. Meanwhile, adult streaming platform cam Soda

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previously offered the proud V card holder two hundred and

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fifty thousand dollars to host a virginal show on their site, saying,

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your debut would be a masterclass in proving that you

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don't need to go all the way to make people

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go all in. That's according to cam SODA's vice president

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Darren Parker. Plus, let's be honest, who wouldn't want to

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see what the most lucrative virgin in the game has to.

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Say she's made forty three million dollars and you offer

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her a quarter mill I think that.

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Offer was before it was known how much she was

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pulling in in her content, and that's probably why she

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released that figure, because you had the head of cam

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so to saying I'll give you a quarter million dollars,

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we'll do this, blah blah blah, and she's like, bitch,

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please look at my bank account. Honestly, she could just

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sell it. She could just sell whatever her subscription is

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on only Fans. Again, I have no idea. Let's say

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it's twenty bucks a month. She could sell a one

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off thing on her own.

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Where she actually loses her virginity and has that filmed

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or whatever.

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That could be a one off sold like a pay

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per view event for one hundred dollars and people would

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buy it and it would probably still be more entertaining

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than the Jake Paul Mike Tyson fight. Honestly, if you

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insert Sophie Rain in the middle of that fight, now

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we're really talking about something here. Now, that's the way

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you're gonna lose a If you're gonna lose it, that

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that'd be a way to go.

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I would.

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I would guess she would lose it to the guy

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that gave her four point seven million dollars, Like that's

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who you right, Like, that's kind of that's only fair.

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Well, or you know, if if she got some guy

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to give her four point seven million just for various acts,

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who knows what, she could you know, get paid to

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auction off her v card.

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That's what I'm saying to that, Like, that guy would

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probably be the top bidder and.

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He has any money left, yeah, if he has any

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money left. But let's be honest. I mean, if someone's

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gonna swoop in and like if she was to actually

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just outright sell her virginity, uh, you know, a Saudi

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prince is gonna come come, you know, flying in to

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be like I got this.

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Yeah, that was my first thought. I'm not gonna make

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that up. That was my first thought.

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Is like if she was to do middle if Sophie Rain,

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the only fans creator, was to then sell her virginity, would.

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That then conflict with her Christian beliefs?

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I would go with you, yes, And as as a Hindu, yes,

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I don't know a lot about a lot, but I

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know that much.

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Uh, But yeah, I don't think you can.

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I don't think there's anywhere in the Bible it says,

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you know, you have to stay in virgin until marriage

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or until a Saudi prince flies in.

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But I mean part of Jesus's posse was Mary Magdalen,

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who was a reported uh call girl, woman of the night,

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So I mean he's not totally ignorant of the profession.

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Yeah, but I think she knocked that off once she

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she met Jesus. So I think.

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As far as we know, yeah, as far as we know,

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she gave she gave up that.

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Life and became a devout follower of Jesus.

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And I will say this, Uh, Sophie Rain, as a

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self professed virgin and only fans creator has the ability,

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has the opportunity to do something truly miraculous this Christmas.

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Is she she could take the best of both worlds

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and one fails.

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Swoop.

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If she sells the virginity and somehow gets pregnant at

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the same time, she's both Mary's wrapped in one little package.

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I think I think you got the story wrong. She

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got pregnant as a virgin, not the other way around.

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I'm just saying that there's an opportunity here for a

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Christmas miracle she could really cash in on.

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Now, this is a Christmas story I'll watch.

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I bet you wear that pink bunny up fit.

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Now you're listening to the Treehouse. Visit us online at

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Treehouse on Air dot com.

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It truly is the greatest story ever told.

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You're in the Treehouse.

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Visit us online at Treehouse on Air dot com.

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are available to shoot us an email Treehouse on Air

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at gmail. That's Treehouse on Air at gmail dot com

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to advertise right here inside the Treehouse. You are in

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the Treehouse. I'm Danil Malley along with Trey Trenholm and

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Raj Sharma. I don't know if this is my phone

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or my computer listening to me as we talked about

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that story with Sophie Rain and OnlyFans and religion. But

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I just got shown one of the best news article

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recommendations I have ever seen in my life.

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Are you guys ready to hear this headline?

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Pope Francis to open five sacred portals on Christmas Eve

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for a ritual that's never been done before. I would

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like to point out that I have yet to read

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this story past the headline. But with a headline like that,

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I figure we can just kind of learn about it together.

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What do you say, Let's do it, okay?

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Pope Francis to open five sacred portals on Christmas Eve

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for a ritual that's never been done before.

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Four.

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Pope Francis will commence a centuries long Catholic tradition on

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Christmas Eve and introduce a first time historical addition to

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the holy ritual. Starting on December twenty fourth, the pontiff

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will open a series of five holy doors throughout the Vatican,

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including Saint Peter's Basilica, plus Rome's three other basilicas, to

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commence next year's Catholic Church Jubilee, a joyful commemoration of

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faith that normally occurs.

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Every twenty five years.

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The door at Saint Peter's was sealed shut by a

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wall of bricks since the Jubilee Year of Divine Mercy

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in twenty sixteen, and on December second, those were written

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down to ready the door for opening as part of

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the right of recognition. Is it just me or does

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this just sound like a Catholic Advent calendar.

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But life size.

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I don't know what that is.

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Yes, where you three you count down the days to Christmas?

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Rosh oh, gotcha, little little treats and things.

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Yeah, okay, now we don't we don't really do that.

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So if you're watching the show, which you can do

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at patreon dot com slash Treehouse on air when you

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subscribe to the Treehouse, you can see over my shoulder here,

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I have a little advent calendar. That's that was a

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gift from my wife. That is a Christmas vacation themed

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advent calendar from China.

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Yeah.

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Yeah, yeah, Rajer.

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Think of it like a a calendar, just like a

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daily scratch off. Oh okay, yeah, depending on Yeah, there's

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all various things but and themes.

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But it's like a little gift every day.

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Yeah, oh okay, that's nice.

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I'm not I'm not winning thousands of dollars on mine

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from I wish that'd be awesome. So after that Christmas

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Eve ritual, Oh Francis will open a symbolic door inside

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the Roman Prison Rebibia on December twenty sixth, which is

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the Feast, which is the Feast of Saint Stephen. It'll

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be the first time a pope has opened a holy

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door at a prison. That's according to the Denver Catholic.

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According to Pope Francis, he says, I think of prisoners

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who deprived of their freedom daily, feel the harshness of

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detention and its restrictions, lack of affection, and in more

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than a few cases, lack of respect. In order to

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offer prisoners a concrete sign of closeness, I would myself

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like to open a holy door in a prison as

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a sign inviting prisoners to look to the future with

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hope and a renewed sense of confidence.

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I think, if you want to do that for them,

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just open the gate.

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That's what I was gonna say. It's like the headline

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is hundreds of prisoners fleet.

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I don't think they want you to open a symbolic door.

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They want you to open the door and say you

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may go.

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Oh.

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It is nice of him, though, too, as he says

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to offer prisoners a concrete sign of closeness, which well.

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That a certain way.

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He The objective of opening the doors later this month

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is to usher in a year renewed in hope as

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Christians and as Christians find Christ as the door of

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our salvation. Pope Francis wrote in proclamation for the twenty

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twenty five year long celebration. He says God's word helps

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us find reasons for that hope in the heart of

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each person. Hope dwells as the desire and expectation of

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good things to come, despite our not knowing what the

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future may bring.

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Pretty sure, I'm sure there's some altar boys that are

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delighted that the prisoners are gonna, you know, take up

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the reins you you mothers, let their holy doors be.

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Yeah, you're right, I imagine imagine some of those kids

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are thinking, like, how about we shut some doors.

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Knock yourself out? How about the back one.

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You're listening to the treehouse, visit us online at Treehouse

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on air dot com.

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You're in the treehouse.

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the microphone lower right hand corner and leave us a message.

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Talk back to us. Click on that microphone and leave

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us a message. Thank you very much.

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Uh. I have a pro tip and This not a

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pro tip for you Trey, or for you Raj, and

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definitely not for myself. This is just for the general public.

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If anyone is keeping a public file for us for

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the FCC, slide this in there because this is a

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pro tip. Don't tell police you're a pro drinker, especially

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if they've just pulled you over for a suspicion of

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DWY seems like an obvious thing, but there's one man

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who didn't get this membo. There was a multi vehicle

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crash in Colorado earlier this month, and when the police

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showed up, a driver admitted that he'd had some drinks

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and basically confessed to being the cause of the accident.

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But he's got a reason. Okay, he's got a reason.

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I want you to hear it.

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How much if you have to drink that a ten drinks?

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See, most cops are used to hearing two drinks. This

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guy went straight to the top with ten.

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Ten.

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Yeah, how much if you had to drinks that ten drinks?

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Cool? If you want to do road tie you to

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tell me your ten drink.

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Steve right pretty drunk.

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The cops like, we don't even need to do the roadside.

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You told me you've had ten.

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There's no way you're going to pass that.

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Thing, right, I plot is honesty. But if I was

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this lawyer, I'd be.

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Like, you dumb.

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Yeah, I'm still gonna charge you my full fee.

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Yeah, but you stupid?

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Yeah? Oh my god, ten ten drinks. That's impressive.

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If you want to do road tiz, tell me you're

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trying to drink Steve right, I can preach.

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Your own day. Yeah, okay, right now, like I'm.

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Okay, yes, yes you are.

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No, I'm sorry, No you're not. No, you're a leaping amateur.

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Professional drinkers would never admit to it. Yes, that that

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is from a professional drinker. Yes, yes, now I will

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say this to this man's credit. Even though he caused

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an accident, he's admitted to having ten drinks, and he

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claims to be a professional drinker, basically saying it's okay.

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It is okay because I'm professional at it.

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So, while the police didn't bother with the roadside sobriety

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test since the man confessed to having ten drinks mmm,

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they did get a breathalyzer from him, and the breath

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lizer test showed this professional drinker had a BAC of

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point three two six, which is four.

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Times the legal limit.

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Well, that side of the pro drinker argument holds liquor

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because if if you can have a BAC of point

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three two six and still be coherent to tell police anything,

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you've definitely got some stamina. Not smart, but you've definitely

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got some stamina.

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I mean, remember, Olympians are amateurs.

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That's true.

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That is true. They have to give up their amateur status.

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Yeah once they go pro.

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So yeah, good good on this guy man point three

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two six, hell like done?

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Goodness, Yeah he was arrested.

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That's uh yeah, good news is uh, no one was

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injured in the crash, but the pro drinker was was arrest.

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Okay, okay at point three two six. Like shouldn't they

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just like, hey, call somebody that's impressive, Like, well, we're

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not gonna take you to jail because nobody's gonna believe this.

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You don't get clemency for a high score.

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Yeah, okay, I know that's the Indian in me.

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I'm like, he he got the highest score out of everybody. Uh,

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they should just be like, hey man, good, you're still talking,

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you can move, you can stand up straight, you're looking

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at me in the eye.

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All right, buddy, just call somebody and go home.

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Just a fist, bump toe the car to let him

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walk home or something.

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Yes, at that point, like that's that's that's impressed. Like

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I've never even heard of somebody having a B A

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C like that.

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I have, I've I've heard of I've heard of some

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point four's in the news before threes. Yeah, Now, the

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point four ones don't typically have this happy of an outcome.

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That's usually where the headline is is something along the

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lines of former pro drinker.

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I can think.

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You're listening to the Treehouse. Visit us online at Treehouse

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on Air dot com.

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Youreuse visit us online at Treehouseonair dot com.

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Did you know you can get more Treehouse It's true.

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Go to patreon dot com slash Treehouse on Air and

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subscribe to Treehouse Plus, Treehouse Super Plus and Ultimate Treehouse.

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That is, to get bonus many episodes of the Treehouse

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and full video episodes of this here program. Just go

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to Patreon dot com slash Treehouse on Air. Back inside

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the Treehouse Now, I'm Dan along with Trey and Raj.

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If you are looking for a new job in the

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new year, and if you hate people, I've really really

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got your attention.

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Now.

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If you're looking for a new job next year and

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you hate people, I've got the job listings for you.

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Are you ready, Trey, you you immediately perked up.

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You like absolutely, I'm all ears.

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Yeah, So here we go.

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This is these are the perfect jobs for people who

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hate people.

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Okay, it's a.

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Thread online and people are suggesting based off this question,

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ideal jobs for people that hate people.

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So yeah, if you're looking for a new job in

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twenty twenty five.

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Here you go.

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Number one power plant operator.

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They say most of that is sitting in a room

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at a control panel that auto fixes itself.

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Ninety nine percent of the time. Sounds easy enough.

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I've been on LinkedIn more in the last couple of

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years than I have on the than I have in

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the previous twenty I've yet to see a power plant

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operator position open. And maybe it's because these people got

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it figured out. Maybe it is a really good, cushy job.

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I mean, hell of Homer Simpson can do it for

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as long as ease. That is nuclear power plant job

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number two. And this is kind of twisted. Some kinds

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of doctors, like say a pathologist or a doctor at

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a morgue, which makes sense. If you hate people, then

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that's kind of that makes sense. Like a medical examiner,

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what a jerk?

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So there you go.

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There's if you feel like you know doing the can

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you know the additional education and learning.

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To be a doctor, be a doctor? Can evil doctor?

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Number three lighthouse keeper.

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I'll occasionally see these photos online where it'll be a

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lighthouse or a very secluded cabin somewhere, and it'll say

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it's you know, it's it's a it's a make believe thing.

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Could you live in this house with you no whatever,

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like no internet for thirty days And a lot of

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people are like yes, because it looks beautiful and serene

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and you don't have to worry about other people and nonsense.

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Lighthouse keeper would be like that.

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No Internet.

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Well, lighthouse keepers, by today's standards, I think you get

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Wi Fi, but those fantastical, those make belie leave situations

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online that's usually could you live in this beautiful, serene

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place but completely unplugged for thirty days?

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Interesting? I don't think I can. I don't think I

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can do that.

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I couldn't.

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Yeah, I remember seeing one of those lighthouse jobs. It

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was like you're you're out alone for like six months

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and it looks great and everything else. Then they show

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you some of the storms that you're gonna face and

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I was like, uh oh no, it was. It was

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Trust Me, I'm a Professional | Wednesday 12.18.24

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