YouTube Ep 9 | Dear Treehouse | Advice On Life, Love, Relationships, and Needy Vaginas

0:05 It is time to leave your worries outside and laugh with us inside the treehouse. I'm Dan ol Mallley and he is Trey Trendholm. What do you have for us today? Trey? Well, Dan, I feel like the world needs some advice and and and I think we're we're, you know, two people to uh to really give that advice out? Are we people? For people that are posting on Reddit? Yes? You know what? When uh, you know what? You're right, Trey, there does seem to be an overall lack of two white guys telling people what to do with their lives.

0:46 So let's dig in, let's go, let's get after it. Hey, if you're posting on credit for advice, you could do worse than ours. That's a good point. I'm with you there, Thank you for Yeah. I mean I've not only are some of the post on Reddit fantastic about what people ask the stories they come up with, but some of the advice, I mean, it's top notch. What I find myself doing late at night is I'll occasionally scroll Reddit and I'll just like, I'll go through and I'll go into certain subreddits like am I the a hole? Or am I overreacting? All those types of subreddits, and I'll go in there and I'll just scroll. I won't even look at the full story or the comments.

1:42 I just look at the headlines and just think, my god, what is wrong with some of you people? It's a yeah, I I mean, it's one of the things I think is our overall problem. But the fact that what is it about Reddit is so fascinating, because I don't know what it is about that site that it's like people just spill everything out out on there and then either are shocked by some of the advice they get or or the reactions that they elicit. It's amazing what can happen when you ask a bunch of strangers for their opinion and their advice, and then they give it to you, and you're shocked at what some of them have to say. You shouldn't be You should not be shocked by what some of these people are going to tell you, because you opened it up.

2:39 You opened up this forum, and you asked a question, and you got some answers, some of which you may not have wanted, some of which you may feel compelled to call the authorities on. But I mean, that's what happens when you ask a bunch of people something and everyone has the power of anonymity. Well, also, let's keep in mind, I mean, go back to to the whole Reddit game stop stock thing that you know, where they just drove up the price. I mean, and it's a it was a fascinating study. But keep in mind one of the people that profited most off the game stop deal on Reddit was a guy living in his mom's basement.

3:20 Mhm. It's the ultimate stereotype, it is, and I power to the people it goes to show. I think Reddit is a great example of the power of the Internet for both good and evil. Agreed, A. There's nothing you can't find on Reddit m hm. And but it also it as society progresses in the Internet is just more and more a staple of people's lives.

4:02 And I it's just amazing that people will just throw stuff out there for advice to a bunch of strangers. And I mean, and maybe maybe there's something cathartic about it. I don't know that I'll ever try. I think you may be onto something there because I have heard and I don't know if this is coming from actual professionals or this just you know online you know, social media experts or experts on social media saying like, if if there's something that you're holding on to, whether it's a past regret or something you wish you could have told someone in the moment, something you wish you could have said for some situation, whatever it is, write a letter to that person or to yourself, get it out, put it on paper, and then just you don't even send it to the person. It's just you just write it down, kind of like a journal, and that's supposed to be somehow cathartic. Maybe that's what this is in digital form. I feel really bad about neglecting my mom, so I'm going to write this thing on Reddit. Maybe it'll make me feel better. But not if you read all the comments that aimed at me, bro, that could be aimed at both of us. I don't feel bad about neglecting my mom and B the a hole. Yeah, I'm gonna need more information please. Yeah, that topic is

5:35 a shotgun and you and I both are downrange. Oh yeah, that one would be a really tough one for me right now, because yeah, my mom blew away blue through all her money. Uh oh yeah, is she asking you for some uh huh? And It's an odd feeling, isn't it. It's a very odd feeling. And you know, I've tried to help her out some. I wish I had made better decisions in my life, that I was in a position I could help her out more. But now all he can do is help her sell some of her crap.

6:20 And but at the same time, I warned her about this a year ago because where she was living, I go, you need to scale down. Your money is finite. And anytime I've tried to get you know, I tried to help take control of her finances and getting better organized. I was told to basically f off and. Okay, here she is, and. Here she is, you know, but you know, and then I start looking through things and I'm going, oh, so you needlessly were having your dog walked three times a day. Oh wow, when someone was there in the morning, could have done it. And then it was like, hey, all right, good luck.

7:08 Yeah, all right. So now your mom is out of money and you're helping her to find ways to sell some of her things to get money, right, right, eBay and the like. Have you considered seeing how much you could get just for her just sell her to someone else, like here, put a bow on her and go here, here's a mom. Take it. I've yeah, that's I have better luck with a ninety five Ultima with two hundred and fifty thousand miles. No, that even, you know. The more fascinating thing is she flew it, flooted it out there one time about what I could come live with you? Oh no, the fun You're not.

8:02 No, you can't just get that out of your head right now. And and part of it is like because she, you know, in a kind of a guilt trip moment, was like, well you would do it for your stepmother? Yeah, you're out of would. It's a harsh truth, mom, but yeah, you backed me into her corner. And yes, I'm going to be honest with you about it now. Yes, And mind you, this is two days after her basically, when she was telling me all my life's mistakes and I said anything else, she goes, yeah, you were born.

8:48 And you're still taking care of her. I'm trying to yeah, mhm. Where she lives right now? Is it on the first floor? No? Well, after a bomb like that, I can only think of one place to make yourself feel better. And that's right. What did you find? What did you find that made you feel better? Oh, there's a lot of things. So a couple of my my favorite reddits are number one, am I the asshole.

9:31 M? And then the other one there's uh, well, there's a couple of relationship reddits, but the first one am I the asshole for evicting my girlfriend of three years. No, I'm just gonna go on face value. I love, I love, I love doing these just on the headline and just going with my gut reaction based on next to no information. If he if he felt the need or she whatever. If this person felt the need to evict the girlfriend after three years she did something wrong, I'm yeah. Oh you're you are not wrong. So it's a good feeling.

10:13 I'll summarize this a little bit. The guy's thirty three. He received an inheritance when he was twenty four, bought a cool condo in downtown Vancouver. Been dating a girl for three years and she's been living there for the last two years. He makes more money with her, so he doesn't charge her a lot of rent or anything else, and he said pretty much pays for everything. About a month ago, they were supposed to go out on a Saturday, but she canceled the plans and said she had to go to a family dinner that he wasn't invited to, which normally his and said her parents live about an hour away and they were going to discuss what to do with her grandmother that was getting dementia. So edding, long story short, she leaves for the day to go to her air quotes family meeting, briefly calls him that night saying she's had a couple of glasses of wine with her mom and is going to spend the night there, but then doesn't show up. The next morning, he calls the mom, and Mom's like, no, I don't know what you're talking about. I haven't seen her. There was no family meeting. Oh man, so as any guy would, or any any person if they found this out. You know, he's obviously getting angrier by the second.

11:35 Oh yeah, said, because your imagination starts taking over and creating these wild and horrible scenarios, and they run the gamut, some of which involve her being dead in a ditch and some of her just being faced down ass up in front of a train. Yes, and that is uh, he's so. Then shortly after he said, someone starts trying to buzz in to get to into the building, and it's his girlfriend. She's lost her fob to get into the building, and uh, obviously he confronted her and said she lied to him. Went clubbing with a friend, they met a group of three guys started to go back to their place. She said, she of course did nothing. It was just her friend that was having sex with them.

12:31 Okay, what you were just filming? If that and and if that was true, you didn't feel that you could tell me that. Instead, you decided to create some lie about family and blah blah blah blah blah that was premeditated. Come on, lady, that's not even a good lie. Like Thanels had a point, Okay, overall, Thanels had a point, but more specifically, like when he's talking to uh, what's your face? Saying I never taught you to lie? I should it's like he's saying, it's like you're so bad at it, M And that's what this sounds like. If you're bad at lying, don't do it. Just don't. I mean, you shouldn't lie anyway, but I get it. Shit happens.

13:17 But if you're gonna do it, do it well, do it well? And tie up loose ends, so you know when you're gonna include your family and your life, either give them the heads up or don't do it because they're just right off the bat, you've left yourself open to someone going no, I don't know what you're talking about. Yeah, so anyways, No, dude, you are not the asshole. You had every right kicker the f out. Yeah. Absolutely, it's not even close. This. Why did you feel that he didn't need advice, he just needed support? Well, I am sure, I am sure there are people who have been you were like, oh my gosh, but but she needed a place to live. How could you just put her out on the street? Well, was she should have thought about that?

14:08 Yeah, if sounds like she knows. It sounds to me like she knows of at least one place that she'd be with too. Of those guys upondents? Are you know her friend? But you know, also, when you're going to say that, no, I was just sitting there. My friend was the one getting railed. Yeah, yeah, I'm not buying that, lady. Sorry, So, no, dude, you are not the asshole, and don't don't listen to anyone who makes you feel like you are. Yeah, this really is a scenario that this one's not a complicated at all. I was thinking it was going to be a thing like she was taking advantage of him and find finances and he's floating it and evicted her.

14:53 It's like when he when I realized when the headline was, am I the a hole for evicting my girlfriend of three years? I was thinking of it. It sounded more like a landlord issue. She was taking advantage of the situation, not paying rent, not cleaning, doing all these things that would make you a very terrible tenant. Which he didn't just evict her from the building. I mean, it's like he evicted her from the relationship. Like wait, so it's the headline is a little misleading. Well, judging by the comments that was some of the people were on there saying, and I don't know what the laws are in Canada, but some people were like, oh, she's entitled the part of the equity in your place. Now He's like, no, she's not. I've taught to an attorney.

15:36 And but a lot of people are here like, well, you can't just put her out on the streets. Yeah you can't. I really can. I absolutely and if she didn't. It's my house, and if she didn't want to be put out on the streets, you should have thought about that before. Yeah, at least they had a backup. Always have a backup plan. Mm hmm. It sounds like her back gut plan was backing up. Ah. Well, yeah, I have I have. I have no sympathy for for someone in this situation, and I don't understand people that would say, well, shouldn't have a place to go. Well, she should have thought about that before she helped somebody come.

16:20 Exactly. That's what I can't That's what I can't stand. I can't stand it when people don't think one or two steps ahead, they just start doing shit. Think about it, think about it just a little bit, Think about what if? What if? What is the worst possible thing that could happen if I go through with this lie. My boyfriend finds out well, and the guys that use me like a slut don't want me. Yeah, had she thought of that, she might have, you know, not done what she did, or she at least would have had a plan in place just in case the worst case scenario happens as it did. See, if you prepare yourself for the worst, but hope for the best.

17:02 You'll be better prepared. Sage advice, sir, sage advice. Especially if, especially if you have plans to run a train and you're the conductor. All right, So the next one, oh oh, there there's a lot more there's but this one it's a funny, funny thing. But at the end is where I'm like, this is why you don't You really should think before you post on reddick or Reddit or any forum on the internet. The title is this weird libido change in my late twenties twenty eight. I've always had a fairly libido, but lately, within the last year it got n half hand.

17:48 I've always masturbated clatorally, and usually that was enough to satisfy me, but now I'm left wanting for more. I can't get satisfied. It's like my vagina is literally craving dick, like I need to put something in there. It's almost like an eight What the F. It's almost like a what an ache? Oh? Got it? Yeah, So I'll admit I was I. I will admit I'm a little sexist on this one because right up until you mentioned platorally, I assume this is exactly well that's.

18:33 So. Here's the you know, it's so bad. I even got back with an X just that for the physical MC, but broke that off. Now the ache is back. I need to have sex, don't have a boyfriend. I hate this. Does this happen to everyone? Is my body just trying to get me pregnant? L O L oh my god FML l O L. But then edit to the pathetic ask perverts trying to DM me, I'm not looking at any of your messages. I'm simply hitting ignore and moving on with my day. What did you think was gonna happen when you post it on Reddit that you needed constant dick?

19:22 What? What? What were your expectations here did you? I mean, look, guys, guys will send that stuff at the drop of a hat anyway, just just the mere hint of an invitation. Guys will send that stuff. And here you're saying it's wide open for business and you're mad that people are coming knocking down your door. And this is something we have talked about for years, and it's just the truth. If you were a girl, I don't care what you look like, what your weight is, anything else. If you want to get laid, you can get. Mm hmm. There's always at least one guy, always somewhere.

20:06 There's always at least one. You may typically more than but. Yeah, especially you know, go to a bar, find some drunk ones. You can always find one. But yeah, what what did you expect when you post on Reddit that you are literally craving dick? Did you not think they were gonna come out of the woodwork. Did you just think it was going to be a flood of empathy? Yeah, that's up, so good luck to you lady. It's just how do you not know this about life in general? Which is the old saying you reap what you sew, You get back what you put out into the world. If you put out onto Reddit that you have it crazy, yeah, and then and then a bunch of people go, here's my offering, how why are you bad?

21:10 I mean, if you you basically just ran an ad and people showing. You put out there that you needed money, and a bunch of people sent you money, you wouldn't be pissed. Yeah, god, oh people. You know what, as much as I hate people, and I do I want that. No, the older I get, the more people I hate. You know what? That sounds too specific. Let me step back and make that more broad, is what I mean. The older I get, the more I hate people. Yeah, just all. And this is another great example of that, people having certain expectations and not realizing what's going to happen. My hope is that she's learned from this and that going forward, she'll think about the things she posts and you know how like, uh, what's the term dog whistle? Yeah, that's that's what she did.

22:14 She just blew a really big dog whistle in the middle of this Reddit form and they came and running, Why are you surprised? Why are you surprised? And and and you could have said that out loud at a bar, posted it on Reddit, posted it on any social media, and they're gonna come running swinging like Parzan. From Vain to Vein. All right, one more, All right, here we go. My girlfriend recently betrayed me. For a long time, most of my life, I was very overweight, weighing in at you know, about five eleven and three hundred and forty pounds. Over the last year, I lost a lot of weight, got fit, finally found a diet that's stuck, and even got a girlfriend.

23:25 Never felt better and more comfortable in my own skin than I have recently. So for Halloween, my girlfriend and I decided to dress up, and she wanted to do something from Rocky Horror Picture Show, and I dressed up as Frankenfurter. Now, for those of you who don't know, that's basically a man in lingerie, it's the. Tim Currii role, right, That's correct, got it? Thank you for saving me the search. Girlfriend found it incredibly hot. We had the best sex of our lives that night, and after that she kept wanting me to put it on and has even bought me some more lingerie. Everything was going great until I found out that she was telling all our friends about how I like to dress up in lingerie and have sex with her.

24:27 Oh no, that is the ultimate betrayal. So now I'm not quite sure what to do. I think I have to break up with her. I feel incredibly betrayed. Was I stupid to trust her so much? Yes? Well, and Dan, this is where I wanted to ask you, At what point do you tell your partner these deep down secrets? Well, this one's weird. I believe in open communication, you should build the voice of the things you want and need in the bedroom. Sure, but this one, this ain't right because it sounds to me if I'm receiving all the information that you've put out there that this guy put on Reddit correctly, he was cool with his new hot body and decided to show it off a little bit on Halloween. Turned on his girlfriend so much that she now realizes maybe she didn't realize this is a thing she was into and until by the way, what I wonder is is he into it as much as she is?

25:39 No, So number one, I should I press this. This was one of these reddits that had constant updates. It was actually from Halloween a year ago, and so then it was a bunch of updates since then. Whatever. But No, in fact, she was the one who kept buying lingerie because it turned her on so much. But then she started telling her friends about it, and obviously I think her friends probably looked at it a little weird. So she was like, yeah, he's got this thing. You know, it's fetish about dressing up in ladree, which included obviously, when you're a couple, you have other couples that you're friends with. The guy she's friends with the girl, so now his buddies. No, he likes dressing up in lingerie.

26:28 First of all, Trey, I'm not saying this is you at all. I just wanted on the record that if you were the guy in this scenario and I was the friend one of your buddies, I really wouldn't give you that much of a hard time about it. I'd be like, best sex of your life. Huh, that's good, Good on you. You do you whatever makes you happy. You're doing something that makes her happy, and she sold you out, that's bad. I got you and I have the rest of our lives for me. Give you a hard time about wearing women's lingerie, but ultimately you were doing something to help their relationship. So from a macro standpoint, I applaud the effort. And from a more specific standpoint, Uh, he can't just break up with her. He has to move, he has to fight. Have you ever heard of this?

27:21 I saw this online a few months ago. There there's a service that a company in Japan offers that they will disappear you in the middle of the night. They will take you like close up all your bills, all your business, everything. They will relocate you into hiding with a brand new life. This is what that's what this guy needs. If he feels this betrayed and that he can't look at all the people he knows in the face anymore, then he should just you know, poof. But but you, you would be such a friend that you would, you know, be like, oh, I understand, man, if you're into it, who cares? I mean? You say that.

28:08 But I also have a feeling that the next show would be let's talk about trace lingerie fetish. Well, I'm not saying I wouldn't use it as shown, I'm just saying off the air as a friend, i'd be there for you. Professionally speaking, I'm gonna run you over with a lingerie bus. The bus is gonna have stockings like a microthong thing. It's gonna he'd be like a little strap on. Jokes aren't funny anymore, are they? That is right? Joke about it again? Go ahead, come on, lover boy, not the least to what your new nickname would be.

28:50 Freaking well, I don't think you have much worry about that one. I can't walk in high heels. Especially not that's hard enough in jeans. For all things Treehouse. Hit our website, Treehouse on air dot com. You can also listen to the Treehouse Show podcast everywhere you get your podcasts, that includes Spotify, iHeart Apple, over Acast, Amazon Music. Find and choose your favorite platform today at Treehouse on air dot com, or also on Patreon. We'll see you next time right here inside the Treehouse