April 20, 2026

Dear Treehouse #20 | Relationship Confessions, Toxic Kids & Brutally Honest Advice 😂

Show Notes
Transcript

How honest should you be in a relationship? And what do you do if your kid is… kind of a nightmare? 😅

Welcome to Dear Treehouse, the advice segment of The Treehouse Show—where we answer real-life questions with zero filter and a lot of laughs. In Episode 20, we break down:

When (and if) you should confess your past to your partner
How much honesty is TOO much in relationships
What to do when your kid is acting like a complete jerk
Real talk on parenting, dating, and tough conversations

If you like comedy podcasts that mix relationship advice, parenting struggles, and unfiltered humor, you’re in the right place. 🎙️ The Treehouse Show covers funny news, viral stories, dating chaos, and real-life situations with a comedic twist.

About the show:

Leave your worries outside and join Dan O'Malley, Trey Trenholm, and their hilarious guests for laughs about funny news and viral stories with ridiculous commentary inside the Treehouse Show.

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WEBVTT

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Oh that's right. It is time to leave your worries

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outside and laugh with us inside the Treehouse. I'm Daniel

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Malley along with Trey Trendholm and Raj Sharma. Trey, what

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do we have in store for Deer Tree House today, Well.

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We're gonna start off with something that just makes you

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shake your head and go why.

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You're gonna need to narrow that down?

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Yeah?

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I feel like that's every time I open my phone

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or watch.

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My husband confessed to me. Husband twenty nine confessed to

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me last night that at a friend's Bucks Night bachelor party,

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two weeks before our wedding last year, his friend paid

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for a private lap dance. He was drunk and coked up,

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and during the lap dance, as a consequence, made out

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with the stripper. He promised, that's all it was. I

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was so scared before he confessed that he's slept with

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someone cheats on me. When he broke the news, cheated

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on me. When he broke the news, I wasn't even

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phased that much. He was distraught, you know, telling me this.

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He was almost hyperventilating in fear that I would leave him.

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I was consoling him as he was a mess. I

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felt so bad for how bad he was feeling. He

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told me I don't need to console him, and he

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was apologetic and remorseful, but I was very forgiving in

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the moment she messed up. Today, I am mad at

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the thought of kissing, of him kissing another woman when

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he knows how I feel about strippers, nothing against them.

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I just don't want my husband being around him. I

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feel silly going back on my forgiveness.

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Is that wrong?

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I am actually hurt and so disappointed.

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It's got to be so confusing to be a feminist

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but also jealous like that, Just that conflicting world happened

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right there, because on one hand, you want to support

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your fellow woman on going to get you know, being

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empowered and doing your thing girl, But at the same time,

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don't make out with my husband, all right, so let

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me make sure he got this straight. Bachelor party, the

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now husband. On the bachelor party night, his best man

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buys my lap dance and he he tongue down a stripper.

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Mm hmm. The now husband, he confesses, and the year this.

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Is like a year later.

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Why why why why why why?

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Why? Time?

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It takes It's hey, it takes time to you know,

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what build up the courage to confess.

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No, no, but sometimes it makes a year that window

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closed a long time ago. There there are windows for

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certain things in relationships, I feel, and this is one

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that was closed a long time ago and never should

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have been opened again. I don't know why he would

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confess a year later.

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I had an ex girlfriend by me a lap dance

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at the clubhouse one night, and she was over the

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moon about it.

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At the time, or you were, she was your current

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at the time.

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She was my current at the time. Yeah, and she's

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the one that bought the lap dance and she's like,

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go for it.

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Well, I think there's something. If they're there, it's one thing.

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If if it's uh, they're.

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Always here, they're always here in my heart, they're here,

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and they're here and here.

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You just don't want always here or there there. That's

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why I rule she I mean she was.

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She was like, if you want to have a threesome,

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we just have to find the right person. Like that

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was the thing. Like I was like, Okay, that's not

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my thing. Uh, but uh, good to know, I guess.

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So maybe he thought she was on the same page

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as he was with the best man.

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I'm going to say no, because from what Trey said

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in the description, he was so distraught and fearful about

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coming clean and confessing to her. He was expecting her

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to you know, to dump him, to divorce him, and

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instead he's going the route that she feels bad for

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him about how bad he feels. So she consoles him,

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which that's not fair because to me, all all she

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was doing at that moment was laying She's laying groundwork

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for him to do worse things. He's like, you know,

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all you did was kiss her. That's fine. I thought

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it was gonna be way worse. And now he's like, well,

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if I just baby step it eventually get to you.

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Know, he was laying groundwork as well.

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But I mean I think, uh, he was the one

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who was upset.

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She is angry a year later, Well, she's anger that

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this was recently, but yeah, I mean after after she

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thought about it, she's now angry, big surprise.

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Uh huh. Yeah, But because in the in the moment,

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she hadn't processed at all. So let me make sure

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at the timeline correct. A year ago, he made out

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with the strip, got married, then now present day, he

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tells her, yes, got it, and then in the moment

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she consoled him. But now, after a little bit of

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time has passed after his confessional, she's now rightfully upset

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that he did something you shouldn't have.

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Yeah, a big shocker. She's thought about it, and now

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she's really pissed.

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But you know what she should be.

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And maybe it's my I don't know, maybe maybe it's

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my flawed deal. But why now? Why? That's why did

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you decide you needed to confess this? What good? Listen?

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It's like in AA when you make amends, there's basically

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this caveat which says, if you're going to do if

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your a mind is going to do more harm than good,

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keep it to yourself. Yes, what good did you think

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was gonna come out of this? How?

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What?

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Hey? You know, maybe he was just trying to be

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an honest guy and be like, listen, this is what.

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This has been on my mind for a while a year.

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No, no to me. No, That's that's why I'm saying,

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in relationship, you have a window. You have a window

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in which you need to confess this thing. I'm wondering

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what else was going on recently that he all of

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a sudden felt the need to confess this thing that

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happened a year ago.

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Also, let's move the stripper aside. The cocaine wasn't a problem.

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Clearly not the way this is written.

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That's just like, you know, you know, he's coked up.

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Yeah, it Saturday night.

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To me, that would be the ultimate excuse. That would

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be the reason that you made out with the stripper.

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It's like, baby, I had no idea what I was doing.

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I was coked out of my mind, and that is

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the reason you did it.

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When you're coked out of your mind, do you know

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what you're doing?

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Well, yeah, here's the other thing I ever done it.

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So I don't know. I don't think the way this

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is written, I don't think this is If he blames

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it on the coke, I think he's gonna have a

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lot more explaining to do about a bunch of other nights.

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Yeah.

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Again, that's that's where it depends.

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First time whatever, if it was just booze, like, you

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can blame it on booze, Like, Hey, I was drunk,

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I didn't realize what was going on. I woke up

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the next day and I realized what happened. Blah blah blah.

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But when you're drunk and on cocaine. Start with those two. First,

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stripper third.

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Okay, so with cocaine, there is no blackout. In fact,

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it's the opposite. It's everything is hyper aware and awake. Yes,

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got it. But I've got to assume.

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But yes, I've got to assume he has there was

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someone in the in the group of friends that knows

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what happened, told his significant other like they're breaking up

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or something, and he's worried he's about to get busted.

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Right. That's because otherwise there's no reason to ever bring

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it up ever again, let alone a year later. No, honestly,

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unless there's photographic or video evidence of the night in question.

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I mean you're talking about a year later, deniability is

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high for him.

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I mean like, yeah, you saved that, You saved that

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for therapy.

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You don't tell the wife, that's silly. Yeah.

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Yeah, you want to work through some issues and you

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really feel guilty about it, go to therapy and talk

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to a therapist about why you did it. Uh, not necessarily,

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just because you just want to offload the burden onto

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someone else to see if she'll keep you around. Kind

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of a thing.

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But also, flip side, isn't that a decent dude, Like,

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he's like, hey man, this has been on my mind

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for a year. I am so sorry. I was on

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drugs and drunk and I did this.

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If he truly feels sorry, then yeah, I'm fine with that.

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But you can't go the you know, the the boohoo,

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woe is me. I feel so badly blah blah blah.

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You just need to be kind of straight with and

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be like, all right, look, I feel terribly about this.

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I feel so bad about it. I'm now going to

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tell you what I did. I did this thing. I

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did X y Z and I've thought about long and

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hard about whether or not I should say anything. I

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decided to tell you because it's the right thing to do,

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and I want to and if he wants to be

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with her, he needs to say that. He's like, look,

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I want to be with you, and I want you

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to know so you can decide whether or not you

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you can get past this thing to stay with me.

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That's really about the only way I think you can

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go about it. I still say you don't say anything, Well.

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I'm sure. I'm sure he was long and hard to.

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So if if you're really if it's if it's eating

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you up with that much guilt? Wouldn't it have been

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prudent to talk about this before the wedding?

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Yes, that's what.

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That's right.

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I go back to my window. You go back to

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the window. You know how expensive weddings are.

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I well know. I. But if you're trying to be

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a good guy and it's eating you up with guilt,

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don't you want to confess your sins before you say

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I do?

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You cut the cake fucking first.

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Like you're gonna be in trouble either way.

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Yes, you cut the cake and then fucking hey, uh,

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I'm sorry about that.

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That's all is right? Before you do the little like

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smush the cake in each other's mouth kind of thing.

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As you're slicing it, you just whispered to her, I

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made not with the stripper.

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Shoot, And that's what you'll know if she's the one

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by whether or not she stabbed you with the with

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the cutlery because.

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You told her at the right time about you give

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her the power right then and there. Yeah, or maybe

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the option to stab me if you want. I made

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up with the stripper on my bachelor party.

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Or there's another. Because it says the wedding was in March,

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and you do the math, or something more than kissing

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happened and he's got to take a DNA test.

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I don't know how it happened, Baby, everything was above

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the clothes.

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You said you wanted kids.

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Yeah, Baby, I got good news, bad news.

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You didn't say they had to be yours.

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I found us a surprise surrogate. I didn't cheat on you.

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I just I just did a surprise surrogate.

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Aren't you at Mercedes?

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Happy Valentine's Day? By the way, I've also gone ahead

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and and hired on a production crew to follow us

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around for the reality show we are now going to film.

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I'll see it in lifetime.

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Oh god, Yeah, there are a lot of levels to

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this one. Dre that's a doozy. Oh man, why why?

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Why? Oh?

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I mean I hadn't Again. I had an ex that

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worked at Baby Dolls. She was the bartender there, and

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I would come in just to pick her up from

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work and sit down and grab a beer, and she

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would buy me lap dances. So it just depends on like,

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I didn't feel anything. I felt weird, but there was

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no guilt. Like this guy obviously had some sort of

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like moment where he was over a year, has been

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stewing on this.

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Yeah, I just I don't buy it. I don't buy it.

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I feel like something more happened. I think something else

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was coming, because if he's truly guilty, he would have

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said something a year prior. Waiting a year before he

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says something, something else was about to drop.

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Interesting.

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I like the friend idea, like somebody else rotted him

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out that.

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I can see.

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00:13:11.240 --> 00:13:13.399
Yeah, I mean it's got it. That's the only thing

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that makes sense. I don't know any other guy that'd

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be like after after a year later, all of like,

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do you do you really feel that badly about something

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you did a year ago?

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No?

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No, especially if you knew it was wrong. If you

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knew it was wrong, and a year later you still

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think about it, You're not thinking about how badly you

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feel about it. You're thinking a year later, Ah, got

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away with it. I'm in the clear.

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Uh that's a solid point. Yeah.

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If if nobody ratted me out in a year, I'm like, Okay,

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we're good. We don't have to do anything at all.

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So for him to come clean, well, yeah, the other

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shoe was about to drop.

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Yeah, either eithers Either Mercedes Junior is about to drop.

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Uh Or, That's what I want to name my child.

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There's no other senior but Mercedes Jor is just his name.

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00:14:10.759 --> 00:14:12.559
Yeah, Rajah, I don't know if you know this about me,

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but I'm actually really really good with naming babies.

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Oh are you?

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00:14:17.879 --> 00:14:22.480
Yeah? One of my favorites was Thud, Thud thud, because

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00:14:22.480 --> 00:14:25.799
that's the noise he made when he fell out. It

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00:14:25.919 --> 00:14:27.799
was a very special couple. And for those that have

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been listening to the Treehouse Show long enough, they will

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know who I'm talking about and appreciate baby Thud. So

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00:14:34.799 --> 00:14:37.000
now I have a mount Rushmore's baby names. I have

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Thud and Mercedes Junior.

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Nickname Sea Class.

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I like you gave him the smallest version. He's not

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00:14:53.000 --> 00:14:55.360
even an E class, no.

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C class for a different reason because it's tre and

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she's driving it and he's under it.

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All right?

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00:15:10.720 --> 00:15:17.000
Next up? Yes, Dan, I don't know if you you

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00:15:17.080 --> 00:15:20.320
may not relate to this, I think, Raj, will I

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00:15:20.440 --> 00:15:23.080
do because I don't know if you ever dated anyone

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00:15:23.120 --> 00:15:25.000
with kids?

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Yes?

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Sort of? Okay, so not serious? Not seriously? How about that?

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Am I the asshole for breaking up with my girlfriend

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when her kid called me names? And she didn't tell

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him to knock it off.

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No.

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My ex girlfriend, Heather and I are both teachers. She's

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forty eight and I'm forty eight. She's thirty four. Got

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together four years ago. Well, I've known her son since

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he was eleven. I have no biological children. Just getting

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00:16:00.320 --> 00:16:02.759
the facts out of the way. I had a polite

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relationship with her son for the four years i've known him.

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Good kid, blah blah blah. His father is a waste

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of air. So Dan Junior as the kid, wasn't really

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a problem for most of our relationship. His dad was

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00:16:22.080 --> 00:16:25.039
and is a jerk, but not more than not around

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more than most. Anyways. Then Heather and I started talking

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about getting married, and all of a sudden, he started

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mouthing off and misbehaving, saying stuff that I couldn't replace

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his dad. He was confrontational. I'm a teacher, so I've

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seen many kids go through this. I talked together about

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getting him some therapy and also suggested family therapy. She

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said she's seen students too, and she should know what

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he needs. Just after Christmas?

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00:16:50.799 --> 00:16:53.360
Can I interrupt real quick, just quick clarifying question, how

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00:16:53.360 --> 00:16:54.039
old is the kid?

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The kid would now be fifteen. Okay, well, just after

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00:17:01.159 --> 00:17:06.480
Christmas break he started calling me a pedophile. That's the

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00:17:06.559 --> 00:17:09.119
kind of thing that could end my career. Talked to

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00:17:09.160 --> 00:17:11.440
Heather about it, and she said he was just working

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through his emotions. I understood he was angry and confused,

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00:17:16.279 --> 00:17:20.440
but some words could lead to severe consequences. She refused

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00:17:20.440 --> 00:17:23.640
to see my position. I brought it up in counseling,

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00:17:23.680 --> 00:17:28.880
and she still defended Dan Junior. The kid said it

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00:17:28.920 --> 00:17:32.680
again in therapy, said I could have been her teacher,

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which she was in elementary school, which, while it was

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00:17:37.200 --> 00:17:40.400
technically true, I never met her until she was thirty,

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so I can't take any chances. I broke up with

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00:17:44.279 --> 00:17:46.839
her and moved out. She thinks I'm overreacting.

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Nope.

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Her folks think we needed to slow down and give

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the kid a chance to catch up. I miss her,

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00:17:53.480 --> 00:17:55.440
like I said, I can't have that word around me

332
00:17:56.079 --> 00:17:59.880
and she couldn't control her kid. Am I being an asshole?

333
00:18:00.440 --> 00:18:05.319
No? No, In fact, you're a freaking saint, because if

334
00:18:05.359 --> 00:18:10.240
I was you. No, I am not a pedophile. I am, however,

335
00:18:10.319 --> 00:18:13.039
a punch a Fhile the reason I asked how old

336
00:18:13.079 --> 00:18:14.839
the kid is is like, is he old? Enough to

337
00:18:14.920 --> 00:18:20.160
deck because that is and this is also a reason

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00:18:20.200 --> 00:18:23.960
why I don't have children, because I'm like fifteen punchable. Absolutely,

339
00:18:25.039 --> 00:18:26.640
you know, he did the right thing. He did the

340
00:18:26.680 --> 00:18:31.920
mature thing, He did the very responsible professional thing by

341
00:18:31.960 --> 00:18:35.759
getting himself out of that situation and may and you

342
00:18:35.799 --> 00:18:37.680
know what, maybe might not be a bad idea to

343
00:18:37.839 --> 00:18:39.920
move fresh start, get out of that town. I don't

344
00:18:39.960 --> 00:18:43.160
know how big it is, but get out. Because he's right.

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00:18:43.559 --> 00:18:46.519
You can't have that P word following you around, period

346
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if you're a person, but especially if you are a teacher.

347
00:18:52.680 --> 00:18:53.599
I mean that's what I did.

348
00:18:53.759 --> 00:18:58.880
I'm my ex her daughter, same thing, not pedophile, but

349
00:18:59.000 --> 00:19:01.640
she's like, uh, I met her when she was eleven,

350
00:19:02.119 --> 00:19:05.880
and this was when she was sixteen or seventeen, and

351
00:19:05.920 --> 00:19:08.000
she said, I didn't like you from the moment I

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00:19:08.039 --> 00:19:08.359
met you.

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And I was the daughter, Yes, okay, I didn't like you.

354
00:19:14.400 --> 00:19:16.079
With from the moment I met you, And I was like,

355
00:19:16.119 --> 00:19:18.839
that's kind of but I went to like, you know,

356
00:19:19.559 --> 00:19:23.640
if it's like, you know, dad daughter dance or whatever,

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I'm the step dad.

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00:19:26.119 --> 00:19:28.480
That's what she used to call her friends.

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00:19:30.039 --> 00:19:35.720
So I Christmas presents and birthday presents and all that stuff.

360
00:19:36.119 --> 00:19:38.319
And this is what I said to her when she

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00:19:38.519 --> 00:19:42.799
was sixteen seventeen. I said, but you took every gift

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00:19:42.920 --> 00:19:46.359
I ever gave you. And she's like, yeah, I go.

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00:19:46.440 --> 00:19:52.319
You know who does that? Strippers, that's who does that.

364
00:19:52.480 --> 00:19:55.960
They pretend to like men that they don't like and

365
00:19:56.079 --> 00:19:59.039
take gifts that are given to them. And as she

366
00:19:59.240 --> 00:20:04.200
said that, uh, I remember this vividly. Her mom was

367
00:20:04.240 --> 00:20:06.079
on the phone, My ex was on the phone, like

368
00:20:06.160 --> 00:20:09.559
just watching YouTube. She didn't correct the daughter like, hey man,

369
00:20:10.240 --> 00:20:14.720
he's done so much for you. Uh So I was like,

370
00:20:15.000 --> 00:20:19.720
I'm out of this immediately because there's no reason to

371
00:20:20.400 --> 00:20:21.440
this is not salvageable.

372
00:20:21.680 --> 00:20:23.240
And heard to me it heard to me, it's a

373
00:20:23.400 --> 00:20:25.839
it's a red yeah.

374
00:20:26.039 --> 00:20:28.799
Or her dad deadbeat, like he lives at home with

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00:20:28.839 --> 00:20:31.079
his father and plays roadblocks with her.

376
00:20:32.119 --> 00:20:34.799
So to me, it is a red flag. If like

377
00:20:34.839 --> 00:20:38.400
to me as an adult, as a parent, it's a

378
00:20:38.440 --> 00:20:42.839
red flag if you don't recognize that your children are fallible.

379
00:20:43.880 --> 00:20:46.759
If if you're of the mindset that your children are

380
00:20:46.799 --> 00:20:50.119
perfect little angels and can do no wrong, then you

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00:20:50.160 --> 00:20:53.160
should run as fast as you can in the opposite direction.

382
00:20:53.640 --> 00:21:00.319
Because now, because that's not a parent, uh because children

383
00:21:00.359 --> 00:21:02.920
are supposed to learn from their parents. Parents are supposed

384
00:21:02.960 --> 00:21:05.160
to teach their children. And if they don't teach the

385
00:21:05.279 --> 00:21:11.519
children how to you know, speak with communicate, get along

386
00:21:11.599 --> 00:21:17.079
with elders, you know, people in authority, or just good

387
00:21:17.079 --> 00:21:21.519
old fashioned human respect, then you need to run right.

388
00:21:22.519 --> 00:21:24.880
Yeah, I mean like we would just randomly, like I

389
00:21:24.960 --> 00:21:26.440
just look at her and like, hey, you want to

390
00:21:26.440 --> 00:21:26.920
go to the mall.

391
00:21:27.000 --> 00:21:28.000
I just want to walk around.

392
00:21:28.240 --> 00:21:30.400
Let's go do something, and I'd buy her something like

393
00:21:30.440 --> 00:21:32.799
a sweatshirt or a T shirt or whatever it was.

394
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Uh, and oh, you're the best, You're the best.

395
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You're you're one of my best friends, you know, fist

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Dear Treehouse #20 | Relationship Confessions, Toxic Kids & Brutally Honest Advice 😂

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