March 12, 2026

Magic Mike | Thursday 03.12.26

Magic Mike | Thursday 03.12.26
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In today's episode, we talk about a bass fisherman who is going to learn a new meaning to fish hook, what the latest trend in bachelorette parties is, and hemorrhoids can be drained?  

LINKS:


Angler arrested after getting caught cheating during North Texas fishing tournament

Bridesmaids swear new trend at bachelorette parties even ‘better than a stripper’

https://www.usmagazine.com/entertainment/news/who-is-matt-waldron-padres-pitcher-was-benched-to-have-hemorrhoids-drained/

The Treehouse Show is a Dallas based comedy podcast. Leave your worries outside and join Dan O'Malley, Trey Trenholm, Raj Sharma, and their guests for laughs about funny news, viral stories, and hilarious commentary.

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WEBVTT

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Want more Treehouse, check out our YouTube exclusive shows at

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YouTube dot com. Slash at Treehouse on air.

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It is time to leave your worries outside and laugh

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with us inside the Treehouse. I'm Daniel Malley along with

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Trey Trindholm and Jerry Caldwell.

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Coming up on today's show, I didn't know you could

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drain these.

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Trey has a big arch review hopefully that will rival

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the McDonald's CEO. And there's a new party trick crashing

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bachelorette parties. That's all today Inside the Treehouse show. But first.

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We are going to start with felonious fishing.

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Over the years, I have fought all of these types

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of stories because I am so intrigued by those that

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not only cheat to get ahead in life in general,

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but especially those that do it in the very illustrious

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sport of fishing. A North Texas angler was arrested after

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officials say he's stuffed three weights inside of a bass

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during a Lake Fort fishing tournament in an attempt to

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win a prize of over ten thousand dollars. So if

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you're wondering why anglers are cheating at bass tournaments, it's

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because money. Lots and lots of money. It's not just

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about a trophy in bragging rights. Tournament staff noticed something

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suspicious at the wigh in when a metal detector alerted

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them to objects inside the fish. Yes, this is so common.

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They run the fish through metal detector. Game Wards later

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confirmed the weights and found similar ones on the angler's boat,

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and because the prize exceeded ten thousand dollars, the alleged

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cheating resulted in a third degree felony charge under Texas

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Fishing Tournament Law. Texas Tournament Fishing Law. If ever, there

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was a time for you to feel slighted that whatever

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law you want passed in Texas hasn't yet. Just know

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it's now worse knowing there's a Texas Tournament Fishing law

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in front of it.

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It's no bs in Texas. It's like football beer fishing.

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It's like it's your holy trinity right there.

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You can't.

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I grew up fishing. I enjoyed it. It was never

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competitive at it. And again, I don't really know how

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many fish my grandfather had in his stock pond. Some

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days it felt like none. But I felt out of fishing.

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You know, It's like I think the last time I

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was ever actually consistent fishing was like eleven or twelve

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years old. As an adult man, if someone says, now, hey,

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you want to go fishing, I'm like, eh, And it's

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not because I don't enjoy it. It's because it's been

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so long. I'm afraid to go because I can't do

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it very well. I don't want to be the guy

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that asks my buddy, hey, can you tie this for me?

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It's not fun when you emasculate yourself, and so I

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don't typically seek that out.

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Anybody ever, fite you to go fishing. Just let me know.

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I'll give you a little tie in tutorial. You'll be good.

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It's easy because all I end up doing is just

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tying like fifty knots in the thing and just hoping

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for the best twist and loop.

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Twist and loop.

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Is it basically you're just making a little noose kind

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of on the fishing line. Yeah, I'm not going to

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say I know how to tie a noose. I'm just

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saying I think I know how.

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So I mean, do you know what a good bass

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boat costs? I don't.

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I know what.

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I know.

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Boats are shockingly expensive.

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Bass boats are shockingly even more shockingly expensive because you're not.

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It's not like you're getting a cruiser or you know,

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something that can hold ten people, but you know, a

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good a new bass boat top of the line. You're

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talking sixty seventy thousand dollars.

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Woo woo. Does that include the motor? Yeah, okay, just

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make it sure because I've never bought a boat.

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That's the thing with.

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And I hate that I even know anything about this,

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but at one point I had a friend who decided

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he wanted to be a on the bass phishing tour.

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And the thing that makes it it's not just the

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prize money, but it's the sponsorship deals where you get

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get the goods, because I mean, you ever, if you

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ever look at these guys, you know, they look like

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a NASCAR car. They've got patches everywhere and sponsorships and

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everything else. So you win a tournament, it's a lot

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more than.

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The prize money.

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So here for a twenty twenty six Phoenix twenty one

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x E Penci. We're looking at a twenty one and

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a half foot boat. It's got a Mercury engine two

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hundred and fifty horsepower. It's very sleek, it's purple, it's beautiful.

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Take a guess how much costs. What year is it again?

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Twenty twenty six and it's an XL E.

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Close enough.

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Yeah, I don't, I don't freaking no, it's and it's

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got a Mercury two fifty on her. All right, I'll

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go based on Trey's earlier range. That is common. I'll

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go fifty.

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Five, all right, Tray, Yeah, sixty five.

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One hundred and nine, nine and ninety five dollars brand new,

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and you can have it.

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I was a little off. Now that's top end obviously, Jesus.

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Like living where I live, you know, in the in

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the Virgin Islands, I see really really nice boats every

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single day, and I see the entire range of them,

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like yesterday, looking down into the harbor. In addition to

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cruise ships, there were three massive yachts. And when I

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say massive now, I mean like stop you dead in

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your tracks, massive yachts like the mega yacht style, you know,

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like the the Lady that is one of the main

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heirs of Walmart. Her boat called Chaos comes here pretty often.

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That's a boat I want to get on, and you

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know it when you see it. David Geffen, the record

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producer media mogul. He's got his yacht Rising Sun. You

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know that when you see it, it's a big frickin' boat.

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But then yesterday there's like three out in the harbor

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that just dwarfed all these other yachts, which, by the way,

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the regular yachts are still nothing to turn your nose

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up back because they're probably five to ten million dollar

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yachts that these other yachts are making look like bathtub toys.

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And then when you have a big boat like that,

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you have to have what's called a tender boat, which

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is the boat that tends to the big boat. Because

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it's so big, it can't go into shallow waters to

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get stuff, so you have to have a smaller boat.

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Those smaller boats are still six figures, usually a center

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console type of deal. He's at least two fifty. So

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one hundred thousand dollars bass boat, why not.

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Yeah, those boats you're talking about, they can traverse the seas,

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oh yeah, yeah, and they do good on Texoma.

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Yeah yeah. I don't think I want to take I

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don't want to take one hundred thousand dollars bass boat

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to the Gulf. Maybe stay in the bay at most,

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but I'm definitely not going to take my one hundred

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thousand dollars bass boat across the Atlantic to see if

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I can redo the route of the Titanic. These cheating

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fishing stories always fascinate me, and the fact that it's

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a felony because of the prize money involved is outstanding

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because I just I want to be in I don't

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typically want to be in prison. Just want that made clear. However,

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I would love to be a fly on the wall

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in the cell. When that guy gets to prison and

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his sell he asks him, so, what are you in for?

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And he says fishing. I can't imagine that gets you

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a whole lot of cred inside prison.

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No, I imagine he's going to learn a new meaning

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to fish hook though.

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I think I might actually fly out of cell for

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that part. You're listening to the Treehouse.

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It is online Treehouse on air dot com.

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Eight three three cookdf W is the phone number you

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will need to reach Daniel Cook at COOKDFW Roofing and Restoration.

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Use that to schedule your free roof inspection and property

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review today. Look, let's be honest, the roofing industry is

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not the most well regarded on the consumer side because

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there are so many fly by night slash straight up

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fraudsters out there taking advantage of homeowners. What's what's a

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homeowner to do?

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Daniel Buyer Beware, Buyer, Beware. I can't stress out enough.

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We talk about this all the time. You as a

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homeowner responsible for who you have on your property, how

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they repair it. And there's not much support that's going

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to be given to you. So do your due diligence.

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Do the you know, discovery on the company you're using.

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Find out what their reviews, you know, ask for some references.

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Are they local, do they have they already done, you know,

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work in your neighborhood. Before we just had this happen,

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we had a client that we worked on several homes

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around them. They unfortunately went with a contractor that was

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based out of Houston. They drove up here after the

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last storm in September. They went door knocking. They asked

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this client to get their business from told they had

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all this crew, they had all these specially people that

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could handle their their you know, problems with their home. Well,

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you know, five months into this now they have more

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problems than they actually had after the storm, because now

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they've let somebody that painted their house wrong overspray on

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the brick, you know, the garage doors not you know,

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put in there correctly. Windows are not sealed around. They

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broke brit trying to install the windows. They tried to

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put carpet in a bedroom and they left a big

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seam all the way down the middle of the room.

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So you can see this huge seam in this carpet.

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Just there's a mountain of lists. And now unfortunately this

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homeowner's finding themselves they had to hire a lawyer, spend

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money on litigation up front, because most lawyers aren't going

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to take that on pro bono or anything. Now they're

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fighting this contractor on doing the right thing with their home,

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and they're just asking the contractor to relieve them so

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also of any liability. They're willing to pay them a

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small amount of money of the things they've already done,

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which they're actually going to spend more money.

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To fix them.

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But these are the things that you have to do,

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and the company is not willing to do the right thing,

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you know. That's that's the red flag in itself. But unfortunately,

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now this homeowner's going to go through all of this

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huge lawyer litigation stuff and all this and is going

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to drag out the repairs on their home. So now

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they're going to be out repairs on the home another

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six eight nine months.

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Maybe save yourself the headaches, save yourself the possible nightmares.

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If you need something done around your home, especially when

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it comes to your roof, called Daniel and Kerry Cook

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today eight three three Cook DFW eight three three Cook

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00:12:38.840 --> 00:12:41.759
DFW get that free inspection scheduled. You can also check

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out the website cookdfw dot com.

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You're in the treehouse, visit us online at the Treehouse

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OnAir dot com.

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This segment of the Treehouse is brought to you. Buy

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COOKDFW Roofing and Restoration to get your free roof inspection

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scheduled today eight three to three Cook DFW. That's eight

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00:13:16.159 --> 00:13:19.360
three three Cook DFW. That also comes with a free

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00:13:19.399 --> 00:13:21.759
property review. You can also take a look at the

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website cook dfw dot com and telling the Boys in

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the Treehouse ASSENTI I'm Dan along with Trey and Jerry

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inside the Treehouse on our Ultimate Treehouse live stream earlier

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this week, which are Patreon subscribers, our Ultimate Treehouse Patreon

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00:13:38.799 --> 00:13:44.759
subscribers we're able to enjoy. We talked about the McDonald's CEO,

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going viral for his unboxing and eating of the new

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Big Arch available from McDonald's. I believe for a limited time.

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I don't know if this is a special thing and

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it's gonna go away, or if this is just a

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brand new menu item and it's a staple.

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I think it's a brand new item.

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Good for them, because I mean, look, it sounds good.

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It sounds like everything I would want to burger, which

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is a lot of meat, and his awkward way of

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eating it went crazy viral. It inspired all the other

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CEOs of the fast food companies to eat their products

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for social media and do it better. So yeah, we

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had fun discussing that the other night. But that also

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inspired Trey. Trey, you felt so inspired by Chris k

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the CEO of McDonald's, that you went out and tried

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a big Arch.

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I did.

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I did, And I'm gonna have to say, it's a

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tasty burger, all right, good for them? I was, first

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of all, he is not like it is a big burger.

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I could not. Like I could have finished it all,

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but I would have been miserable. I ate about three

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quarters of it, and I was stuffed. Really Yeah, and

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and and I can put down some food.

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I will. Here is my Yeah. Now that's how you

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00:15:14.960 --> 00:15:15.960
take a bite of a burger.

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00:15:16.320 --> 00:15:19.879
Yeah, there you go, Chris k CEO of McDonald's.

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00:15:20.000 --> 00:15:21.960
That's a hut. That's how you take a bite out

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of a hamburger like a damn man.

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00:15:23.840 --> 00:15:27.120
But yeah, it doesn't like I said, it's it is

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a big burger. It is it's I knew exactly what

248
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he was talking about when he said it is uniquely McDonald's.

249
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It absolutely tastes like a McDonald's burger.

250
00:15:41.600 --> 00:15:43.600
It is a kin to a Big Mac with just

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but the sauce is a little different and it and

252
00:15:46.600 --> 00:15:50.279
it uses a white cheddar cheese instead of American, uh,

253
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big back American or.

254
00:15:53.120 --> 00:15:56.360
Cheddar probably American American I think.

255
00:15:57.960 --> 00:16:03.559
But still excellent burger. I highly recommend. You know it's

256
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fattening as hell.

257
00:16:05.919 --> 00:16:08.720
Well sure, I mean yes, this is this is not

258
00:16:08.840 --> 00:16:11.039
this is not typical food. If you're going for a

259
00:16:11.080 --> 00:16:13.320
six pack, yeah, on your stomach.

260
00:16:14.399 --> 00:16:17.480
If you want to splurge, go get yourself a Big Arch.

261
00:16:17.679 --> 00:16:20.840
They are a very good burger.

262
00:16:22.279 --> 00:16:26.600
We had here. The McDonald's Big Arch is a large,

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00:16:26.799 --> 00:16:33.360
limited time burger featuring two four ounce beef patties, making

264
00:16:33.399 --> 00:16:37.679
it a half pound of meat, three slices of white

265
00:16:37.720 --> 00:16:41.279
cheddar cheese, crispy and slivered onions, pickles, lettuce, and a

266
00:16:41.360 --> 00:16:44.879
new tiny big Arch sauce served on a toasted sesame

267
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and poppy seed bun boasting. I don't know if they

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00:16:48.039 --> 00:16:50.519
boast it, but that's what it says here in the

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00:16:50.519 --> 00:16:56.120
description boasting one thy twenty to one and seventy calories.

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So I could see why you would be a little

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full tray. I mean, that's half a day's worth the calories.

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But definitely H.

273
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Like I said, I will always say McDonald's double cheeseburger

274
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you can never go wrong with it. Gets it gets

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00:17:14.640 --> 00:17:19.920
on my list of all time solid fast food burgers,

276
00:17:19.920 --> 00:17:22.319
I would put it right there.

277
00:17:22.440 --> 00:17:24.480
It would be one A one B with with a

278
00:17:24.519 --> 00:17:29.839
double meat from Waterburger Waterburger double God bless it. So

279
00:17:30.119 --> 00:17:34.359
h but yeah, the big arch solid, highly recommend.

280
00:17:35.000 --> 00:17:37.319
All right, I'll have to see if my McDonald has it,

281
00:17:37.400 --> 00:17:40.119
and if so, I will also give it a try.

282
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And if I do, I will also take a photo

283
00:17:43.279 --> 00:17:43.960
of my bite.

284
00:17:45.440 --> 00:17:47.519
There you go. That's how you do a GD promotion

285
00:17:47.680 --> 00:17:50.119
right there. McDonald's. You can make your checks out to

286
00:17:50.240 --> 00:17:56.880
trade payable to. Hey, well, I guess that's fair. He

287
00:17:56.920 --> 00:17:57.440
did it first.

288
00:18:00.319 --> 00:18:00.799
Well that's right.

289
00:18:01.160 --> 00:18:05.400
Yeah, literally, if you ever do get one, HE'LLI like,

290
00:18:05.559 --> 00:18:07.599
I look at that picture. I'm like, my bite normally

291
00:18:07.640 --> 00:18:10.000
looks a lot bigger on a burger. I think, so

292
00:18:10.119 --> 00:18:15.680
damn big that Uh it's it doesn't look that impressive,

293
00:18:16.240 --> 00:18:17.799
fair enough, but.

294
00:18:17.839 --> 00:18:19.839
It's nice and uniform. I mean, that's a good looking

295
00:18:19.880 --> 00:18:22.640
bite there. I mean, I'm not a dentist or anything,

296
00:18:22.680 --> 00:18:25.200
but I think you look good. Hey, thanks, you're welcome.

297
00:18:26.240 --> 00:18:31.759
All right. Bride'smaids are switching up their traditional bachelorette party,

298
00:18:32.920 --> 00:18:36.319
and they bride's maids swear that this new trend at

299
00:18:36.319 --> 00:18:46.799
bachelorette parties is better than a stripper. I'm trying to

300
00:18:46.799 --> 00:18:48.720
decide if I want to ask you guys this in

301
00:18:48.799 --> 00:18:52.759
a like a believe it or not scenario or a

302
00:18:52.839 --> 00:18:55.079
wrong answers only, or just straight up tell you.

303
00:18:58.680 --> 00:19:00.920
As long as the trend in of them not going

304
00:19:00.960 --> 00:19:03.160
to bars whatever.

305
00:19:04.839 --> 00:19:10.559
Spoken like a true bitter former service industry employee.

306
00:19:11.000 --> 00:19:11.839
Yeah, they're there.

307
00:19:13.880 --> 00:19:16.640
There are some things that just immediately make you cringe

308
00:19:17.759 --> 00:19:21.079
if you know they're coming. And a bachelorette party is

309
00:19:21.200 --> 00:19:21.720
one of them.

310
00:19:23.599 --> 00:19:28.759
The party bus pulls up. Everybody puckers loud, just loud.

311
00:19:28.720 --> 00:19:35.400
Want free shit, just oh, sat out in the tiaras

312
00:19:35.519 --> 00:19:37.440
and ugh no.

313
00:19:37.640 --> 00:19:39.640
Your worst nightmare loud and entitled.

314
00:19:40.000 --> 00:19:44.519
Oh.

315
00:19:44.759 --> 00:19:50.599
Brides to be are changing the rules. They have decided

316
00:19:50.640 --> 00:19:55.200
to leave the traditional bachelorette parties stripper in the past

317
00:19:56.039 --> 00:20:09.519
in favor of something else to entertain them. Magicians. Uh huh, good,

318
00:20:11.720 --> 00:20:13.480
hold on to that thought trick, because I think you

319
00:20:13.519 --> 00:20:16.920
and I are probably in the same place, according to

320
00:20:17.160 --> 00:20:25.480
an Australian magician. According to an Australian magician, he says

321
00:20:25.559 --> 00:20:29.279
he's noticed a massive surge in requests for his services

322
00:20:29.640 --> 00:20:34.039
at bachelorette parties over the past year. He says, I've

323
00:20:34.039 --> 00:20:38.400
noticed a big shift away from traditional bachelorette entertainment. Every

324
00:20:38.440 --> 00:20:41.119
group or bridesmaid who books me says the same thing.

325
00:20:41.200 --> 00:20:44.440
They want something everyone can participate in and enjoy it

326
00:20:44.480 --> 00:20:48.039
without being awkward or tacky. The focus has shifted from

327
00:20:48.119 --> 00:20:54.200
spectacle to connection and creating really memorable experiences, says the magician.

328
00:20:55.079 --> 00:20:57.759
He also says his services typically last an hour and

329
00:20:57.880 --> 00:21:00.880
he performs a series of magic tricks from mind reading

330
00:21:01.079 --> 00:21:05.119
to card games. This year alone, he says he's been

331
00:21:05.119 --> 00:21:08.880
booked for over twenty bachelorette parties. He also says, I'm

332
00:21:08.920 --> 00:21:12.000
seeing more mixed generations at these events, with magic providing

333
00:21:12.000 --> 00:21:15.359
an incredible and unique opportunity to break down walls and

334
00:21:15.440 --> 00:21:19.759
connect attendees very quickly. This magician says that performing at

335
00:21:19.759 --> 00:21:25.079
bachelorette parties is truly is truly, quite special. He also

336
00:21:25.119 --> 00:21:27.559
said that he'll frequently overhear his guests saying that he

337
00:21:27.759 --> 00:21:30.119
was so much better than a stripper.

338
00:21:33.160 --> 00:21:33.519
Sure.

339
00:21:39.000 --> 00:21:43.880
Look, I've seen magicians operate in the bar environment before,

340
00:21:44.000 --> 00:21:47.200
and it's always fascinating to see them come in and

341
00:21:48.480 --> 00:21:51.440
you know, within ten minutes, they've got a small crowd

342
00:21:51.480 --> 00:21:55.319
around them. Right, So I could see how having a

343
00:21:55.359 --> 00:22:00.160
magician at a party might be fun. It's certainly surprising

344
00:22:00.200 --> 00:22:02.519
to hear that bachelorettes are saying, you know what I

345
00:22:02.559 --> 00:22:05.160
really wanted my bachelorette party is a magician.

346
00:22:08.039 --> 00:22:08.240
Yeah.

347
00:22:08.279 --> 00:22:08.359
There.

348
00:22:08.880 --> 00:22:10.480
I don't know if you're thinking of the same. There's

349
00:22:10.519 --> 00:22:12.759
a guy who runs around Uptown has for years. His

350
00:22:12.799 --> 00:22:15.240
name is Dave, and he does magic tricks. He goes

351
00:22:15.240 --> 00:22:18.359
in and out of the bars. He's I knew. I

352
00:22:18.440 --> 00:22:22.400
knew his mentor, who was a far better uh the

353
00:22:22.799 --> 00:22:25.400
magician slash drug dealer slash pool shark.

354
00:22:26.960 --> 00:22:28.720
It's important.

355
00:22:29.079 --> 00:22:32.480
Doc was one of a kind. I Doc was this

356
00:22:32.480 --> 00:22:35.440
this very unique character. He also did security and and

357
00:22:35.480 --> 00:22:36.920
everyone thought it was.

358
00:22:37.000 --> 00:22:38.000
Just absolute bullshit.

359
00:22:38.319 --> 00:22:40.240
But then like when you know, one time, like he

360
00:22:40.279 --> 00:22:44.400
shows up with Britney Spears and uh that yeah, he

361
00:22:44.400 --> 00:22:46.640
would show up with random celebrities and even like Owen

362
00:22:46.640 --> 00:22:50.079
and Luke Wilson came to his funeral. But he would

363
00:22:50.079 --> 00:22:52.400
also say he was a frequent of the of the

364
00:22:52.400 --> 00:22:56.960
Old Loon. And then but you would go anywhere Greenville, uptown,

365
00:22:57.119 --> 00:22:59.680
I mean a deep elum whatever, and like you'd be

366
00:22:59.680 --> 00:23:00.920
at some and a bar and all was an eat.

367
00:23:00.960 --> 00:23:04.079
See Doc pop in and obviously he was. It was

368
00:23:04.079 --> 00:23:12.079
something transactional sure, but uh but Dave, Yeah, if this

369
00:23:12.200 --> 00:23:15.759
was true to this is the the absolute thing Dave

370
00:23:15.799 --> 00:23:17.599
has been waiting on for twenty five years.

371
00:23:18.640 --> 00:23:22.519
His dream might be might be coming true. Because let

372
00:23:22.519 --> 00:23:28.400
me offer a word of warning for grooms, just because

373
00:23:29.079 --> 00:23:33.400
how do I want to phrase this? If your bride

374
00:23:33.440 --> 00:23:37.039
to be tells you that at her bachelorette parties, she's

375
00:23:37.039 --> 00:23:39.319
not going to have a stripper, but instead is going

376
00:23:39.400 --> 00:23:42.880
to have a magician as the groom to be. Don't

377
00:23:42.920 --> 00:23:46.960
feel so sure that nothing will happen mm hm, because

378
00:23:47.000 --> 00:23:49.799
you just know that at the somewhere in the middle

379
00:23:49.839 --> 00:23:52.839
of that magician's act, he's going to say to the

380
00:23:52.880 --> 00:23:57.799
bachelorette party, and now for my next trick, watch me

381
00:23:57.920 --> 00:23:59.279
make my penis disappear.

382
00:24:01.359 --> 00:24:07.440
Yeah, or pick a number between one and ten oh nine.

383
00:24:07.680 --> 00:24:12.720
Yes, bunk, yes, correctly.

384
00:24:22.920 --> 00:24:24.720
You're listening to the Treehouse.

385
00:24:25.319 --> 00:24:30.799
Visit us online that Treehouse on air dot com.

386
00:24:30.839 --> 00:24:33.559
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387
00:24:33.599 --> 00:24:35.839
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388
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389
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390
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391
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392
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393
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R E O N dot com slash Treehouse on Air.

394
00:24:57.480 --> 00:25:01.799
You're in the Treehouse. Give us online at us on

395
00:25:01.880 --> 00:25:05.920
air dot com.

396
00:25:05.920 --> 00:25:14.960
Boy, I didn't know you could drain these things. San

397
00:25:14.960 --> 00:25:22.279
Diego Padres picture Matt waldron is sidelined indefinitely after having

398
00:25:22.279 --> 00:25:26.680
a procedure to drain his hemorrhoids.

399
00:25:29.480 --> 00:25:31.440
What you just removed them?

400
00:25:31.559 --> 00:25:39.640
But you'd think I I have, I have. I have

401
00:25:40.480 --> 00:25:48.319
questions and concerns on many levels. Look, I realize that

402
00:25:48.759 --> 00:25:52.599
as a professional athlete, when you sign your contract, you're

403
00:25:52.599 --> 00:25:57.200
also agreeing to releasing certain medical information. Okay, that's just

404
00:25:57.240 --> 00:26:01.960
how it works injury reports and air competition, adding all

405
00:26:02.000 --> 00:26:06.799
that stuff. Couldn't you just said he twisted his ankle,

406
00:26:10.319 --> 00:26:13.240
something like who did this guy piss off in the

407
00:26:13.359 --> 00:26:15.559
organization for them to be like, oh, yeah, yeah, he's

408
00:26:15.599 --> 00:26:20.440
having his hemrhoids drained. Maybe it's the manager that he

409
00:26:20.480 --> 00:26:23.759
pissed off, because it's his manager that confirmed the hospitalization.

410
00:26:27.200 --> 00:26:32.400
I mean, I've never had a hemorrhoid. I don't know, uh,

411
00:26:33.119 --> 00:26:37.880
but I do know this. My godfather, who is in

412
00:26:37.880 --> 00:26:40.599
the Chiefs Hall of Fame at one point was voted

413
00:26:40.599 --> 00:26:42.400
one of the top ten toughest men to play in

414
00:26:42.440 --> 00:26:48.759
the NFL, played with broken leg, broken arm, broken back.

415
00:26:52.039 --> 00:26:54.480
He always said, till the day he died, the most

416
00:26:54.480 --> 00:26:59.599
painful thing he ever did was play after having hemorrhoid surgery.

417
00:27:01.839 --> 00:27:06.200
Ugh, oh, man, I can't imagine that. I really can't.

418
00:27:06.240 --> 00:27:09.240
Like I'm thinking back to my very limited high school

419
00:27:09.240 --> 00:27:16.160
football playing days just after a hemorrhoid surgery. Just existing

420
00:27:16.319 --> 00:27:20.920
would hurt. Sitting will hurt, Walking will hurt. I can't

421
00:27:20.960 --> 00:27:25.440
even fathom running, let alone running and running into other

422
00:27:25.599 --> 00:27:31.079
people with you know, serious violence. Oh do you know.

423
00:27:33.680 --> 00:27:36.880
The little the little trot that Ogre does when he's

424
00:27:36.960 --> 00:27:39.640
leaving the field on Revenge of the Nerds. After then

425
00:27:39.680 --> 00:27:42.599
they have the liquid heat and the job. That's kind

426
00:27:42.599 --> 00:27:45.079
of Cheryl would demonstrate how he would prance off to

427
00:27:45.119 --> 00:27:46.960
the sideline because all he wanted to do was go

428
00:27:47.000 --> 00:27:49.000
sit on the donut, you know those foam donuts they

429
00:27:49.000 --> 00:27:51.960
would give you after hemorhoid surgery, and that it looked very.

430
00:27:51.960 --> 00:27:52.480
Much like that.

431
00:27:53.000 --> 00:27:55.400
Oh man, I don't know there's enough preparation h on

432
00:27:55.440 --> 00:27:57.319
the planet to make that feel better.

433
00:27:59.480 --> 00:28:01.759
I mean, kudos to him for taking care of it, right.

434
00:28:01.759 --> 00:28:02.759
This was a baseball player.

435
00:28:04.240 --> 00:28:06.160
Yeah, I believe he still is. I don't think.

436
00:28:06.440 --> 00:28:08.680
I don't think it's retired him, but I mean, you

437
00:28:08.720 --> 00:28:10.119
gotta take care of him. You don't want to slide

438
00:28:10.119 --> 00:28:12.839
into home plate leaf skin marks. That's that's very important,

439
00:28:14.319 --> 00:28:15.160
that's very true.

440
00:28:16.279 --> 00:28:19.599
The plate is white, Yeah, the dirt may be brown,

441
00:28:19.799 --> 00:28:21.000
but the plate is white.

442
00:28:24.000 --> 00:28:24.240
Wow.

443
00:28:24.279 --> 00:28:28.680
Okay, maybe I don't I understand what a hemorrhoid is.

444
00:28:28.720 --> 00:28:30.200
I thought it was like a grow. I didn't know

445
00:28:30.279 --> 00:28:31.200
you drained them.

446
00:28:31.759 --> 00:28:32.920
I didn't either either.

447
00:28:33.480 --> 00:28:36.480
No, I mean I honestly I didn't even necessarily know.

448
00:28:36.680 --> 00:28:39.279
I guess I've never thought about it about like, oh,

449
00:28:39.359 --> 00:28:40.000
can you do.

450
00:28:39.920 --> 00:28:41.640
Surgery on a hemorrhoid? I guess you could.

451
00:28:41.720 --> 00:28:44.599
You can do surgery on anything. But as far as

452
00:28:44.640 --> 00:28:50.440
my knowledge of hemorrhoids, it's just a protrusion of you know,

453
00:28:50.519 --> 00:28:56.680
the little tissue just inside your your bung hole right

454
00:28:58.799 --> 00:29:02.279
as you both go to start looking stuff up and look,

455
00:29:02.359 --> 00:29:05.160
I grew I almost said, I almost said, look, I

456
00:29:05.200 --> 00:29:08.119
grew up with hemorrhoids, not on me. Not that there's

457
00:29:08.160 --> 00:29:10.079
anything wrong with that. It's a sad thing if it happens.

458
00:29:10.119 --> 00:29:12.359
I think I've probably had some as an adult, never

459
00:29:12.400 --> 00:29:15.680
had him as a kid. What I mean by I

460
00:29:15.680 --> 00:29:17.960
grew up with hemorrhoids is my dad. I think it

461
00:29:18.000 --> 00:29:20.200
was my dad that had them, because I remember in

462
00:29:20.240 --> 00:29:23.400
our refrigerator at all times there was always a tube

463
00:29:23.440 --> 00:29:26.039
of preparation h in there. And this was the eighties,

464
00:29:26.039 --> 00:29:28.960
this was long before anyone knew that you if you

465
00:29:29.000 --> 00:29:32.359
put preparation H like under your eyes, it can actually

466
00:29:32.400 --> 00:29:35.519
reduce the swelling and the bags under your eyes. People

467
00:29:35.599 --> 00:29:39.920
use preparation H now for cosmetic reasons, not just for hemorrhoids.

468
00:29:40.279 --> 00:29:45.119
But I remember opening up that refrigerator. There was always

469
00:29:45.200 --> 00:29:47.200
in that little window where you're supposed to put the

470
00:29:47.200 --> 00:29:49.119
butter in the door, you know, there was always a

471
00:29:49.160 --> 00:29:51.359
little tube of preparation H in there, And I just

472
00:29:51.400 --> 00:29:53.119
thought it was a guy thing. Now that I'm thinking about,

473
00:29:53.119 --> 00:29:54.480
it's like, I guess it could have been my mom.

474
00:29:54.480 --> 00:29:58.519
I don't know. I've never asked her my dad.

475
00:29:59.160 --> 00:30:02.079
As heck of a reason for you to pick up

476
00:30:02.079 --> 00:30:03.240
the phone and call mom.

477
00:30:03.680 --> 00:30:06.079
It really would be Number one, she would love to

478
00:30:06.119 --> 00:30:06.519
hear from me.

479
00:30:06.640 --> 00:30:10.440
Number Two, I don't think she would want me to say,

480
00:30:10.599 --> 00:30:12.559
so the reason I'm calling today is did you have

481
00:30:12.640 --> 00:30:16.400
hemorrhoids a lot in the eighties. I'm pretty sure at

482
00:30:16.440 --> 00:30:18.920
that point she'll immediately blame my dad, like she does

483
00:30:18.960 --> 00:30:19.519
with everything.

484
00:30:23.920 --> 00:30:29.440
Rightfully, so women should never give away their secrets.

485
00:30:30.599 --> 00:30:33.000
So anyway, Yeah, I grew up with preparation H tubes

486
00:30:33.000 --> 00:30:35.839
of my refrigerator, so I was aware of hemorrhoids as

487
00:30:35.880 --> 00:30:38.000
a kid. But to be honest with you, I didn't

488
00:30:38.000 --> 00:30:42.319
really know what they were. And then at some point

489
00:30:42.400 --> 00:30:44.480
I guess there was some sort of awareness that it

490
00:30:44.559 --> 00:30:45.519
was something with you butt.

491
00:30:45.680 --> 00:30:46.079
I don't know.

492
00:30:46.119 --> 00:30:46.759
I didn't really know.

493
00:30:46.759 --> 00:30:49.079
It didn't really affect me, so I it was just

494
00:30:49.119 --> 00:30:50.680
there in the fridge, and I knew not to eat it.

495
00:30:51.880 --> 00:30:58.240
I got most of my hemorrhoid knowledge from our former coworker.

496
00:31:01.519 --> 00:31:04.720
The one in all right, this is where the show

497
00:31:04.759 --> 00:31:07.640
gets weird. Are you talking about the dead one or

498
00:31:07.640 --> 00:31:09.039
the one that's in federal prison?

499
00:31:10.359 --> 00:31:10.559
Oh?

500
00:31:10.559 --> 00:31:16.880
The dead one, Okay, just checking because the one that's

501
00:31:16.920 --> 00:31:20.359
in federal prison probably has his own newfound knowledge of hemorrhoids.

502
00:31:23.200 --> 00:31:24.359
Teach you to touch kids.

503
00:31:30.960 --> 00:31:33.079
I mean, if if I'm being Trey's gickling that makes

504
00:31:33.079 --> 00:31:33.519
me giggle.

505
00:31:38.119 --> 00:31:39.880
That's kind of It's kind of fitting. We started the

506
00:31:39.920 --> 00:31:42.079
show with prison sex. Maybe we can into it with

507
00:31:42.160 --> 00:31:50.920
prison sex. Uh Okay, So when you guys just now, uh,

508
00:31:51.640 --> 00:31:55.000
did you search on hemorrhoids and surgery? Did you find anything, Jerry?

509
00:31:55.039 --> 00:31:55.599
Would you find?

510
00:31:57.039 --> 00:31:57.400
Uh?

511
00:31:57.440 --> 00:31:57.680
Well?

512
00:31:57.720 --> 00:32:02.400
A hembrooid is basically a blood claw that forms in

513
00:32:02.440 --> 00:32:07.400
a swollen vein, which causes it to like really expand

514
00:32:07.400 --> 00:32:12.480
out like a little bubble. And apparently now instead of

515
00:32:12.519 --> 00:32:16.400
just having them removed if they're not serious, a way

516
00:32:16.400 --> 00:32:19.920
that you can mitigate how bad they are is to

517
00:32:19.960 --> 00:32:27.200
have them drained professionally. Obviously, as you apply your ointments

518
00:32:27.200 --> 00:32:29.319
and you do the things necessary for them to go away.

519
00:32:29.400 --> 00:32:32.440
So it just makes them a little more comfortable to

520
00:32:32.440 --> 00:32:34.640
deal with them while you write it out, so to speak.

521
00:32:34.960 --> 00:32:35.799
Got it? You know?

522
00:32:35.920 --> 00:32:38.359
You do bring up a solid point. If you are

523
00:32:38.400 --> 00:32:42.799
going to have any medical procedure done, especially hemorrhoid draining,

524
00:32:42.880 --> 00:32:45.440
make sure you're going to a professional, because I don't

525
00:32:45.440 --> 00:32:48.880
think you want to go into someone's garage who claims

526
00:32:48.920 --> 00:32:53.240
to be an amateur hemorrhoid drainage expert. I don't think

527
00:32:53.279 --> 00:32:55.000
that's going to end well for you.

528
00:32:56.200 --> 00:32:56.960
I don't think it's going.

529
00:32:56.960 --> 00:32:59.480
To be Are you talking from experience?

530
00:33:01.519 --> 00:33:05.039
I don't need to experience that to know you shouldn't

531
00:33:05.079 --> 00:33:08.400
do it. I'm just I'm making a blanket statement across

532
00:33:08.440 --> 00:33:13.039
the board on the whole. If you need to have

533
00:33:13.119 --> 00:33:16.000
a hemorrhoid drained, don't have it done by an amateur.

534
00:33:16.079 --> 00:33:18.079
Make sure it's done by an actual professional.

535
00:33:19.960 --> 00:33:22.359
Make sure they at least have a business card, at.

536
00:33:22.319 --> 00:33:26.640
Least a business card, Give me a website, at least

537
00:33:26.799 --> 00:33:30.880
at least a linked at least a link tree website,

538
00:33:30.960 --> 00:33:34.759
just something something to lend a little bit of credibility.

539
00:33:36.759 --> 00:33:38.279
Yeah, I don't think that's going to be on the

540
00:33:38.319 --> 00:33:40.200
standard esthetician menu.

541
00:33:42.319 --> 00:33:42.559
Yeah.

542
00:33:42.599 --> 00:33:44.640
I don't think you should go to some guy's house

543
00:33:45.039 --> 00:33:47.880
who's wearing a shirt. If you got him, I'll pop

544
00:33:47.960 --> 00:33:50.880
them and trust him to do it properly.

545
00:33:51.640 --> 00:33:52.640
Throwing a free bleaching.

546
00:33:54.759 --> 00:33:56.480
I don't think you should do those things at the

547
00:33:56.519 --> 00:33:57.200
same time.

548
00:33:59.519 --> 00:34:00.880
I don't think that's a two for one.

549
00:34:00.920 --> 00:34:01.440
You should be.

550
00:34:01.400 --> 00:34:10.800
Doing like Rudge, get a little miradic acid in there.

551
00:34:15.400 --> 00:34:15.840
I just.

552
00:34:17.360 --> 00:34:24.840
I now thank you Jerry for the.

553
00:34:22.079 --> 00:34:26.440
The class on hemorrhoids or the information on the hemorrhoids.

554
00:34:31.159 --> 00:34:34.760
It's important to note, though, that if you snoop in

555
00:34:34.880 --> 00:34:37.760
somebody's house and you find preparation age, it may not

556
00:34:37.960 --> 00:34:40.039
be because they have hemorrhids. It may actually be for

557
00:34:40.280 --> 00:34:41.400
cosmetic reasons.

558
00:34:45.119 --> 00:34:50.280
Dearly noted. I'm gonna have to go buy some right now.

559
00:34:51.760 --> 00:34:54.840
Is that? Is that why it's in your fridge?

560
00:34:55.079 --> 00:35:00.800
Yes, it's not due to any other reason.

561
00:35:05.480 --> 00:35:09.360
For all things treehouse, treehouse on air dot com. And

562
00:35:09.639 --> 00:35:12.559
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